Sounds like a job for…
Jessica Hynes rules. Also, in my agency days, I worked with so many people who spoke like a pastiche of Siobhan Sharpe, rather than the other way around.
My favourite bit is the same blue in the header as an unstyled link.
It hurts. But when you use the shop website, it doesn’t really matter, as everything below the header is exactly as it was before. Same style, same colours, same everything. I used the site before seeing this thread (are Oakley Sutro Lite any good?) and didn’t even notice anything had changed, as you soon scroll off the bit of new candy at the top.