[Closed] Tracing Relatives

Have tried tracing my dad but he won't lie still.

(Coat on and out of the door)

The Salvation Army can help you track long lost relatives.

http://www1.salvationarmy.org.uk/uki/www_uki.nsf/vw-dynamic-index/1DD3D338B60A0D1A802573AD00581CB1?Opendocument

uplink - register of births deaths and marriages. any death should be registered

Thanks taxi put I'm fairly sure he's dead

TJ - I did look at that but I need details like place of death, date etc.

It all sounds a strange request, I know, but I'm getting to that time of life where I'd like to know things & I've put off checking this out for too long

ancestry.com - mostly not free
latter day saints - familysearch.something (possibly.org) - free

You will discover that your relatives from way back were obscure disease-ridden agricultural workers in the 18th century who went on to become obscure disease-ridden industrial workers in the 19th century who then died in childbirth, were killed in the trenches in WW1, were wiped out by flu in 1919, or were killed in the Blitz in 1941. So statistically you are bloody lucky to exist. I advise you not to go poking around in the general unpleasantness of your ancestry - it will only depress you.

Thanks for the advice eldridge but I'm only looking to find out what happened to a brother I never knew
Where [if] he's buried & to generally tie things up & make sure any grave is marked & in good repair

Was there never any mention from your parents? Are they still alive and if so, can you ask them? Any other siblings from your parents that may know? How about old family friends?

Slim pickings I'm afraid - Both parents have passed away
My older brother vaguely remembers hearing mum saying something about him to dad though

Nobody else to ask I'm afraid, I'm taking a trip over to see the vicar in the church near where we used to live as mum was quite religious so he may be able to help with some old records etc. - I do know he's not buried there though unless it was an unmarked or shared grave, which was [apparently] pretty common for babies that died.

Thanks all for the ideas

Would the details not be held at the local council offices? Can't say I have ever had the misfortune to have to tackle something like this though 🙁

worked here earlier in the year http://www.whodoyouthinkyouarelive.co.uk/ and i guess there'll be another one next year

it's a way off but probably the best place to get loads of help on where to start

Could be MF but it's not online [no results found] & the office that issued the birth certificate was 'restructured' [closed] 20 years ago

I spoke to someone at county level who suggested I come in & search the archives so next time I get a couple of days off I'll drive up there & see what I can find

The church could have records of baptisms. They would probably either have a date of birth or age on, so you'd get a better idea for finding the birth certificate.

Good luck.

I've got a birth certificate Mike - that's all though

The vicar does sound helpful & reasonably confident though so I'm trying that first, next week

I've got a birth certificate Mike - that's all though

Would that not be enough to find a death certificate?

I think it's probably easier to find ancestors from way back than fairly recent ones, as the census data is available.

It may be Mike, it's just that there's nothing online that I can find so some shoe leather will need to be used as they don't particularly do phone enquiries

TBH - I'm more interested in finding where he is rather than the death certificate per se but it would confirm things for me

Good luck in your search uplink, I hope you find the information you are looking for.

I would be interested to know how you get on as this could be something I will do myself at some point, although I don't think I am ready to at the moment.

Will do MrsF but TBH, having started it - I'm not really sure I'm ready yet either, it's a lot more emotional than I thought it would be.

I'll leave till next week & see how it goes

thanks all

My wife is a clerk in a Darlington church. If you want any info on what information churches may have, let me know.

Will do Mike, Ta

My email is in my profile.

Cheers Mike - it isn't Darlo though but I appreciate the help

I'll go see the vicar next week & see what he has to say

I was lucky as a lot of my rellies come from Scotland - the Irish side are virtually untraceable - thanks to the Irish's love of torching buildings!

[url= http://www.scotlandspeople.gov.uk/?gclid=CIme04PdopsCFZgU4wodE08_Aw ]Scotlands People Link[/url] if you have rellies from Scotland. My lot are scattered from the Shetlands to Forres and then Glasgow! Was able to trace all the way back to 1700's on the Shetland Islands.

Not much cop if you have no Scottish ancestry I guess 😳

You can do online searches of the General Registrars Office index of death (and birth and marriage) certificates. These are available through third party websites such as www.bmdindex.co.uk/info.htm for a small fee. Records from before 1984 will be harder to search as they are stored in image format but are indexed by name. So if he did die as a child it should be fairly easy to find the certificate as you have the full name and know whereabouts the deceased was living (i.e. which borough). The death certificate also contains the date of birth, so this could help you confirm whether it is the right one. It also has the informants name and address (this would be one of your parents - again assuming he died as a child). It will also have place of death and usual address but it won't tell you where he is buried.

Best of luck uplink
Your not the only one on that trail as I had a younger brother who died in 1967 aged 1 🙁 my mother is very much alive and I have tried to broach the subject a few times but she just shuts me out when I mention it.
I do know it was as a result of negligence in hospital, but I think she has sort of erased it from her memory as her way of dealing with it! I only found out about him when my father died 11 years ago :/

Thanks schnullelieber - that site quickly confirmed for me that he did indeed die in the last quarter of 1960, aged 0

Good luck with your searching MrOvershoot - I guess with your mum in the picture it could me much harder for you - I only have my own feelings to consider

MrOvershoot that is why I haven't done anything about this as yet. My mum and brother were killed in a car accident when I was a child and my father and I find it incredibly difficult to talk about them. There are things that I would like to know, but I have yet to find the courage to broach the subject. I hope I will do at some point.

I am very sorry for both your losses uplink and mrovershoot.

That is not going to be an easy journey for you MrsF but I guess it's one that needs taking sometime - I can't even begin to imagine how I'd cope with that.

There's no hurry to tie these things up so you just need to wait till it feels like the right time & don't be afraid to back away again if it starts hurting too much - take care & good luck

Cobblers I just spent 1/2 hour pouring my heart out in a post and then hit backspace when not in the text box so I have lost it.

MrsFlash I can’t begin to know how you deal with that.

I have located the birth & death cert of my brother through the Scottish site someone linked to. Though I feel slightly guilty as I have gone behind my mothers back (yes I am in my mid 40's but still fear the wrath it could incur) though its a long way for her to come round and clobber me as she lives in France.

She went to great lengths to keep any evidence of him having ever existed from my sister & I, even to the point of destroying the photographs of her while pregnant with him!
Or so she thought as when my father died (they were divorced by this time) he left me 1000's of slides and some were dated 1966 and my mother was obviously pregnant.