[Closed] Things that make you feel a bit "dirty"

I put a tube in my mountain bike wheel

After remembering why I never use that old but still good nobby nic on my commute bike, I used a flat head screwdriver to get said nobby nic off rear wheel, as plastic tyre levers just bent. Late to work by 15minutes. Woopsie.

My 1000gb of bestiality porn

Fast food outlets. However, I never use them so stay clean

getting off the train at Bolton Station when I come to the UK to visit family

Women's tights, the thick ones.

Clicking a link on here and discovering it's the guardian.

parading round the house after a road ride while the bath's running with just my leg and arm warmers on, pretending I'm CZJ in Chicago.

I don't do it so much now the daughters are older but it makes the wife come over all funny.

Was that too much 😉

Women's tights, the thick ones.

10/10 😀

old lady cleavage

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Finding that i agree with jambalaya?

[i]Was that too much[/i]

Pics might've nudged it over.

The sausage and egg mcmuffin looks bloody awesome.

I forgot a very important "occasionally" in that sentence. I'm not that dirty

My drunken stumbling home food is now 2x Double cheeseburgers and a large strawberry milkshake from maccies

That's an improvement as back when i was a big fat f'er it used to be a donner meat pizza

Buying industrial amounts of junk food in Asda yesterday for our ill (tonsilitis) daughter - basically we went round buying all the things that 'took her fancy' which meant all sorts of crap.

I even had to explain to the cashier that it wasn't a normal shopping basket.

Jeez Northwind. Is it even legal to say that?!? 😯

parading round the house after a road ride while the bath's running with just my leg and arm warmers on

Knowing that we may have both been doing the same thing...at the same time....has left me feeling a little violated!

Using the toilet on an airplane.

Using the toilet on an aeroplane after Quirrel.

An inadvertent shart.

I even had to explain to the cashier that it wasn't a normal shopping basket

You were in ASDA. I suspect for a lot of their customers that was a perfectly normal basket

Binners.

Quirrel - Member
Using the toilet on an airplane.

Ahhhh...The pile high club!

Always best to pop down the back if you're going to drop a bomb.

Watching the result of the Copeland byelection and thinking that the winning candidate is quite attractive.

Went in Poundland today...

That'd do it for me.

Knowing that we may have both been doing the same thing...at the same time....has left me feeling a little violated!

Knowing that you may have been spying on me and copying me makes me feel a little more than violated. Quite..... tingly actually.

Browsing On-One/Planet-X

Toilets on a train....shudder.

Lusting for a kebab after a few two many beers, indulging and then waking up in the morning realising what you ate last night.

Moist farts.

Pot Noodle, especially the Chicken* and Mushroom** one.

I had a horrible desire for one after a long run around a reservoir last month and hated myself the whole time I was eating it.

* - May not actually be chicken
** - Also may not actually be mushroom

Having a dump with the door open* if i'm in the house alone.
.
.
.
.
* it's an act of rebellion against the forces of the universe which usually conspire to have a pant-wettingly desperate child bang on the door every single time I sit on the pan.

This place.

Watching the webcams from Casa Perchy.

Watching Flashy as he watches his webcams.

Watching Harry watching Flash, while wearing nothing but arm and leg warmers as the bath runs.

Who, me or you?

There are a lot of us currently hiding in Flashy's wardrobes by the sounds of it. I think that Binners is in here somewhere trying on all the size 10 high heels.

Sitting on the pan with my ipad watching the webcams from PMJ's gaff as he spies on Casa del Spider as he watches Flashy watching me.

It makes me feel a bit dizzy as well.

I blame mrsfry.

Not fussed, if perfectly honest. Who's turn is it this week?

😆

Honey-mustard sauce on my 6" sub

Honey-mustard sauce on my 6" sub

Worst. Euphemism. Ever.

Dirty boy! 🙂

That moment you pull out and see a bit of poo on the end............. then you know you have to wash your hands and change the nappy

A second cream bun or scone.

First one .... lovely... and I done loads of running lately and generally I eat well... go on then, I polish that last one off.

5 Mins later ... yuck feels like I've got cream sweats... not out of guilt or anything like that, just feels like I've OD on cream and it makes me feel icky... especially my face... wierd.

Its never stop me having that last one mind 🙂

Smoking a cheap cigar instead of my usual Havana 🙁

Am I the only one wondering what aracer is going to do with glycerol, deionised water, a battery, wires, a straw, a battery powered air pump and a clearomizer???

Am I the only one wondering what aracer is going to do with glycerol, deionised water, a battery, wires, a straw, a battery powered air pump and a clearomizer???

What a grown man gets up to in the privacy of his own sex dungeon is none of my business.

Starting a thread that's just begging people to ask a question...... and then nobody does 😆

and then nobody does

I've never before in my life purchased something directly related to imbibing tobacco,

I'm all the more curious about this bit. I thought vaping was just what kids who can't buy sweet flavored cigarettes or recovering smokers did. I had no idea adult (I'm assuming a racer isn't 12) non smokers took it up

A ruddy great Donner Kebab and Chips.

It's become a tradition in my House, when my Wife goes out for her Xmas Work thing, the Eldest and I have a horrible greasy Kebab and watch something completely inappropriate for an 11-year-old.

Last year it was Aliens.

It’s the one night I year I know Mrs. Jay will return shitfaced, falling about the place and generally too drunk to notice the smell of Kebab and too hungover to moan about the 18 cert film or deadly food.

The sausage and egg mcmuffin looks bloody awesome.

I'm all the more curious about this bit. I thought vaping was just what kids who can't buy sweet flavored cigarettes or recovering smokers did. I had no idea adult (I'm assuming a racer isn't 12) non smokers took it up

Sadly yes, the huge amount of advertising that the industry is allowed, coupled with the sort of 'cool factor' tobacco hasn't enjoyed since the 50's means the Vape Industry is producing lots of lovely new addicts every day, and nothing does "returning customer" quiet like an Nicotine addiction.

They do actually make nicotine-free vape liquids, which is kind of nuts and sensible all at the same time.

One day, many years from now, I suspect the dangers of vaping will be known and we’ll all wonder how we could have been so stupid, like they did with Tobacco in the 50s.

And we still don't know what he's going to blow up with all those wires and batteries.

I assumed he was making an IED too.

That Daily Express web page what was linked to on another thread and secretly wanting to find out what 8 women said about their experiences with micro penises.

That Daily Express web page what was linked to on another thread and secretly wanting to find out what 8 women said about their experiences with micro penises.

😳

Neptunes kiss.

..... bought a clearomiser.....I've never before in my life purchased something directly related to imbibing tobacco

... and you still haven't.

Riding an elephant in Thailand. Not related to Northwind's post

Having to deal with Quantity Surveyors. 😛
All they want is to have things stroked.

Sunday nights.

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Having to deal with Quantity Surveyors.
All they want is to have things stroked.

Preferable to having to stroke yerself. 🙂

Having to deal with Quantity Surveyors.
All they want is to have things stroked.

I've been thinking of changing my profession for a while.

Always said it's better to be the strokee than the stroker.

Am dirty, am dirty, am dirty! Time for another shower.... That strange QS is following me around. 😛
Now I know why there's never one around to take calls, they're all on specailist forums. 😀

[quote=nealglover ]... and you still haven't.

nicotine then - you know what I meant. It was kind of strange, because I've never paid any attention to such things before, so it was a total mystery to me.

Since somebody finally asked 😉

I've been asked to help the scouts add some effects to their St George's Day dragon - I have a small budget, but not enough to cover a normal battery powered smoke machine.

http://www.instructables.com/id/DIY-Smoke-Machine-from-Ecig-clearomiser/

Bodged together for a test at the moment - I'm blowing through the straw rather than using a pump - and it works surprisingly well.

Chrystal meth and underage Catholic choir boys.

Malvern Rider -
Sunday nights.

Nothing dirty there! Great programme... Not quite as good as the Sky Arts original, but excellent stuff.

Riding a road bike 🙂

^pervert

Lusting for a kebab after a few two many beers, indulging and then waking up in the morning realising what you ate last night.

Pot Noodle, especially the Chicken* and Mushroom** one.

I had a horrible desire for one after a long run around a reservoir last month and hated myself the whole time I was eating it.

* - May not actually be chicken
** - Also may not actually be mushroom

I even had to explain to the cashier that it wasn't a normal shopping basket.

😆

Imagining a 'sportsman's double' with the missus and her mother.

I'll get my coat.