[Closed] There is a boy in my daughters room..

a little poodle

Don't distract us from the really sordid story! 😆

How old is your daughter? The answer is probably.

Kill him with fire!

Little poodle? Is that different to a miniature poodle?
Anyway, I believe the appropriate thing to do is to clean your shotgun in a wing-backed armchair, muttering indistinctly.

I never want a daughter.

Anyway, I believe the appropriate thing to do is to clean your shotgun in a wing-backed armchair, muttering indistinctly.

^This^

Have a word with the wife, she'll tell what girls were up to at that age. I'll tell you what boys were up to too, if you were a late starter, that is. 😉
Anyway, this poodle? 😛

At the very least you need to be walking up and down the stairs loudly every 5 minutes. Actually make that every [s]3[/s] 2

You're probably too late now anyway.

It's the boy at the breakfast table you want to worry about...

You should cup him when he comes out. He'll not return

Don't spend too long polishing the shotgun or she'll be polishing his 😉

It is weird. The first time my son brought his girlfriend home they spent most of the time in his bedroom (both aged 14). I was unsure how to feel about it. I think (probably naively) that they were happy to have some space away from us and on their own.

It is the time to have frank, open conversations about everything (if you have not had them already).

They are still together (he turned 16 today) and they spend most of their time in his bedroom (apart from when they want feeding).

Hum, not sure my 3 daughters where allowed boys in the bedroom, certainly not before their later teens 17 / 18 ?

We can see the stealth edit.....

I'd say it would be amusing if the lad read STW, but we all know that no-one under the age of 35 does.

Seriously, bollocks to the drunken 'shotgun drama queens' on here tonight!

At that age, what is in your mind? Ok, grab the pitchforks 😆

I'd say it would be amusing if the lad read STW, but we all know that no-one under the age of 35 does.

I'm 22, but then again I do get told I'm an old man occasionally

Suggest the last 5 letters of the title probably need removed now...... 😀

I'd say it would be amusing if the lad read STW,

He'd be a truely sad git if he was reading STW right now

Don't worry, apparently kids don't do fingering these days.

They are probably just banging and streaming live to their friends on the webcam.

Suggest the last 5 letters of the title probably need removed now......

😀

I think there are going to be some STW'ers, accompanying Ms Wrigtyson Jr gentleman friend, under the patio he's currently digging out the base for.

Ask if you can borrow his bike?

He'd be a truely sad git if he was reading STW right now

Imagining the scene where the OP's daughter is frustratedly waiting for the BF to finish his point on the EU or Jeremy Corbyn thread.

[quote=Rusty Spanner ]Ask if you can borrow his bike?
Only if the OP is from Norfolk

He'd be a truely sad git if he was reading STW right now

Nah...we're cool. Right?

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would you be so concerned if your daughter was a lesbian tendencies or if it was a gay son with a boy as a freind in their room.

Its 2017 not the 1920,s

Or, funnyily enough 🙄

You could be a total and utter drama queen about it, and ask the opinion of drunken strangers, without giving all the details, on a website forum of their opinion! 😯

Back in the day, this sort of thing wasn't a problem.
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project - Member
would you be so concerned if your daughter was a lesbian tendencies or if it was a gay son with a boy as a freind in their room.

Its 2017 not the 1920,s

In which one of those scenarios is his daughter already preggers?

You started this post 28 minutes ago, he has been sleeping for the last 26 minutes whilst you're daughter is waiting for him to tell her that he loves her

Given the ease of access to prolific amounts of Internet grot, you would probably be better off getting her some swimming goggles rather than worrying about birth control.

Sorry, but Jamie has the right suggestion.

Get out in the yard and start digging that visitor size hole in the ground.

Frank 😀

I take it we're just assumin she has Netflix? Don't think you can have "chill" without it these days

Quality Tag!

Given the ease of access to prolific amounts of Internet grot, you would probably be better off getting her some swimming goggles rather than worrying about birth control.

If she's seen the Donald Trump videos it's him that needs the goggles.

One of these would come in handy ?

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Don't think you can have "chill" without it these days

Or "chilli", if you're Neil and Susan Carter.

To keep their privacy maybe don't fit the trap door and install one of these

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40mins of intense action and STW has blown its load.....

Recharging to go again later

How old is the daughter? I was her age once - shall I tell you what I was up to? 😆

Edit - though it *probably* didn't involve a poodle.

Grab his hand and sniff his fingers before he leaves

Tags: Wrightyson = Granddad

An old flames Dad once said at dinner that I was everything he could have hoped for in one of his daughters boyfriends and that it was a pleasure having me over to stay.

If he'd walked down the open plan stairs and looked across the open plan living room towards the open plan kitchen/dinner on the first night I ever spent there then he may have had a different opinion 😀

I'm sure they're just chatting......

PJ266 - Member

I never want a daughter.

[i]All[/i] the women I want are daughters.

Some cracking replies on this one. As the t-shirt slogan goes...
I have a shotgun, a shovel and an alibi!

So we shoed him out the house pre 10pm. The latest buzz word with "the kids" is they're not going out they're just "talking" whatever that means I'm not sure?

If she's over 16, then even if she's being taken roughly from behind, it's none of your business. It's her business. It's her body, and she's an adult, (presumably). You're only a "guide" along the path we call life.

If she's under 16, then tape him to a typists chair in the garage and pour petrol over him, whilst delivering your speech to him about how no one hurts your daughter, whilst waving a lighter about in a haphazard fashion.

^ erm

Also "talking" is pre "seeing" which is pre "going out" 😉

Jujuuk68 - Member
If she's over 16, then even if she's being taken roughly from behind, it's none of your business. It's her business. It's her body, and she's an adult, (presumably). You're only a "guide" along the path we call life.

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^ That BSometer is great! 😆

Is he gone now?

Gone in 30 seconds at that age

Wonder if he'll come again.

Set out your expectations of behaviour early on and be strict. They'll only get diluted over time then ignored, so just hang in there as long as you can.

Also expect your wife to know way more about their relationship than you.

do you have a brother called Buck ?

Not work or children safe:

CaptainFlashheart - Member
Wonder if he'll come again.

If he didn't while he was there then probably when he got home 🙂

 

it's none of your business. It's her business. It's her body, and she's an adult, (presumably). You're only a "guide" along the path we call life.

I agree in principle but it becomes null & void when its occurring 'under my roof'...think that's the standard parenting caveat 😀

You may as well let them do it 'under your roof' where it's nice and safe and warm - they'll only do it somewhere else otherwise.

Wonder if he'll come again.

Probably at least once since the comment was posted, maybe twice.

You have all this to look forward to Captain... 😆

wallop - Member
You may as well let them do it 'under your roof' where it's nice and safe and warm - they'll only do it somewhere else otherwise.

If she's under 16, then tape him to a typists chair in the garage and pour petrol over him, whilst delivering your speech to him about how no one hurts your daughter, whilst waving a lighter about in a haphazard fashion

😀

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I agree in principle but it becomes null & void when its occurring 'under my roof'

Does this still apply if the daughter's bedroom has a large velux window that is open while lad is in there? 😆

^^^ is that so his mates can watch ? 😀

my 14yr old dd has already stated that she couldnt be a lesbian as girls are too messed up and boys her age are just boys and shes not interested.. spends all her time out running..

What's going to happen will happen, nothing you can do to stop nature...

Better this happens where your daughter feels safe than in the back of a Clio (I've 2 daughters and feel your pain).

my 14yr old dd has already stated that she couldnt be a lesbian as girls are too messed up and boys her age are just boys and shes not interested.. spends all her time out running..

That's what she says she is doing 😉

I was 17 when a boy first visited my bedroom. I had flu, and he was a long standing boyfriend. We pulled the door to so that we could chat at ease (I had a 15 year old brother). My mum had a hissy fit, came upstairs, flung the door open, had some random cross words about it. Me and BF were just kind of bewildered by the steam train which seemed to come hit us for predictable reason. I had flu. Anyway, my mum is bonkers. The moral of the story is don't do that unless you want to be an internet memory in 30 years time as being bonkers. She never did have any kind of talk with me, never took the talking approach. But don't let facts get in the way of a sense of suspicion and fertile imagination, eh?

My mum did have a chat with me Alisonsmiles! And it went like this: (I kid you not- this is 100% genuine)
Mum "So, have you slept with anyone yet?"
Me "Umm- no, why?" (I was 17 and hadn't)
Mum "Well when you do find someone stupid enough to do it with you- make sure you have a w**k first so you last long enough for the poor girl won't you!!"

Then when I started going clubbing (a couple of months after the chat) she said "It's your house too, so I don't care what old tarts you bring back to your room but please let me know before breakfast!"

Equally bonkers perhaps 🙂

"Well when you do find someone stupid enough to do it with you- make sure you have a w**k first so you last long enough for the poor girl won't you!!"

I wish my first boyfriend's Mum had been this thoughtful.

A brilliant thread ..... has made my laugh out loud whilst watching Sarah and Duck with my four year old....

The whole "loaded gun" matter was dealt with effectively in There's Something About Mary, wasn't it?!

When I was a teenager, my parents insisted on door open, 1 foot each on the floor at all times rule. The latter was just an invitation to be more creative. At my GFs house, her dad insisted on leaving the dogs in the room with us at all times. Fear they may be mentally scarred to this day!

Be grateful she's at home, and ensure the communication is open and honest.

A 14 year old in the year above me at school was murdered by the (older) lad who had got her pregnant while her parents thought she was down at the stables with her horses.

My first proper girlfriend played the role of the murdered girl in the Police reconstruction which is when I found out the full story.

Teenage kids have lots of sex. They like it.

Deal.