[Closed] Stuff you HAVE done before

Wayy too much, but that just someone a long time ago who used to wear my skin

Ridden a motorbike @130mph+ on a 30mph road

Dated a pornstar 😳

driven from a to b without feeling the need to complain about something

I have:

Driven over 100mph
Sailed a boat
Killed a creature with my car
held the hands of a few people as they've died
stabbed my best mate in the knee with a scalpel
had about 40% of myself tattood
bungee jumped
re-broken an old ladies arm whilst flying a kite
abseiled
been responsible for getting a few murderers back into the community
been to amsterdam (that explains all i'm willing to admit to online)
performed on stage in front of sold out crowds
🙂 must stop before this list keeps growing and incriminates me 😉

Pigface, sort of snap!
i either:
1 hope i already mentioned this to the wife or 2 she never sees this....

bungee jump
canyoning
flown a plane
driven round silverstone
broken multiple bones (and had metal to fix me)
been in a car crash
worked abroad
had second degree burns
been unconscious

erm...and other things

fired a gun

I have crushed a grape!
Wrestled an Action Man!
Test-driven a Tonka!
Jumped off a dolls' house!
Duff'd a daffodil!

and

Rip'd a tissue!

Made tea.
Read a book.
Stared into a fire.
Walked the dog.
Been for a nice, gentle XC ride.

performed on stage in front of sold out crowds

Awesome

abseiled

Most of your other stuff was seriously impressive, but come on - 14 year old kids abesil at activity centres!

Looped the loop in a glider
Been skinny-dipping on top of a mountain, in the snow
Shot living things and eaten them
Driven at 120MPH
Ridden very fast away from a bear (apparently they can't run downhill: This isn't true, they bloody well can!)

...and a whole lot of other stuff I wouldn't want Mrs Belgium to read about here!

Made tea.
Read a book.
Stared into a fire.
Walked the dog.
Been for a nice, gentle XC ride.

How did you get your name? overdose on fanta and sunny dee?

How did you get your name? overdose on fanta and sunny dee?

I wouldn't want to give you nightmares.

I drank some of Lisa l'Anson's Pepsi once.

drank till i passed out
driven a car very fast round a track
lots and lots of drugs
shot a gun
smashed my knee cap in a skiing crash
Enjoyed the company of two women at one time
had a very very expensive meal
flown in business class (everyone should do it)

Visited a brothel with a famous (non current) Formula one driver. And no I didnt, went just for a giggle !

Been driven home in the back of a police car whilst stark naked (female officer too)

He doesn't bite but he's got a very nasty suck....

performed on stage in front of sold out crowds

How big was the venue though and were you the 'main event'?

I've done a hell of a lot...with hopefully a lot more to come, most of it pretty dumb and not that impressive. 🙂

I drank some of Lisa l'Anson's Pepsi once.

Is that a euphemism? Was it a furry cup?

I would...... 😀

haha i was younger than 14... i was about 9 and at some event, the TA had set up a tower for under16s to abseil down... i got strapped in and went over the edge.... just let go until i realise i was going to hit the ground, grabbed and swung back into the wall about 1ft from the ground.... needless to say whoever was meant to be watcting me got a bo11oxing and i scared my parents!

does that make it a little more awesome?

I drank some of Lisa l'Anson's Pepsi once.

Is that a euphemism? Was it a furry cup?

More like a two litre bottle actually 😉

I once taught the world to sing. The harmonies weren't great though.

The F1 driver - Eddie Irvine I presume?

sold out venues up to 800 as main act, sold out venues up to 1200 (apparently according to venue owners... i think a bit smaller) as main support. main support to skindred was my favourite show.. only a 600cap venue, but the owners are dodgy and crammed 750+ in there, split the crowd down the middle and commanded a wall of death that had enough of an impact to shake the computer monitor off a desk upstairs which broke haha. the first show my girlfriend saw us perform at 🙂 handy as a crap venue with wrong crowd would'nt have been impressive at all.

Did a poo in the sea

Looped the loop in a glider

I have also punched a Baboon until it was sick!

Now THAT i'd pay to see!!! 😀

rode a motorbike on rough ground wen i was about 9 or 10 and nearly killed myself..the throttle was going up up up .

flew over Gretna Green in a helicopter
re-newed my wedding vows at gretna green
tried smoking at the age of 13..first and last ! gud 4 me !
been down some deep and long cave systems luckily i didnt get washed away.
been chased by a wild horse- i beat the horse !
helped deliver my baby donkey (years ago)...
thats all for now ..the list could get too long ! 😉

Still remember the first motorbike i rode as a 12 mebbee 13 year old, Yamaha YPS, all was fine until i hit the power band and that front wheel came RIIIIIIIIGHT up!

- Gotten round a supermarket within 5mins (start to finish)
- Eaten three bacon butties
- Drank three bottles of redwine.

Everything else I'll never write on a forum and the serious stuff I wont reveal until Im dead.

Worn out a big ring on an MTB.
Punched through a door.
Broken several frames.
Spun a car off the road into a hedge backwards.
Been chased out of a farmers field, aged 28! OOiii!

If you'd said 'almost died in an abseiling accident' I'd have been more impressed in the first place 🙂

The F1 driver - Eddie Irvine I presume?

No

Ate 2 Mc dees burgers in one sitting.
Yes. I did feel ill for hours afterwards

I once stole a maintenance buggy from a hotel in Cuba and tried to drive to the local town but the battery ran out and I ended up spending the night in a cuban police cell. Not my finest hour.

Made people I've never met cry using only my voice
Made shallow people in a bohemian bar fall awe-stuck-silent with an acoustic instrumental
Talked a suicidal girl down from a rooftop
Improvised a well-received guitar solo while headlining

The rest is rather self-indulgent...

sounds awesome SSS 🙂

kudos on the suicidal girl thing too, been there a couple of times and its not an easy job!!

I once stole a maintenance buggy from a hotel in Cuba and tried to drive to the local town but the battery ran out and I ended up spending the night in a cuban police cell. Not my finest hour.

Are you Andy Powell, by any chance? 😉

If you think I am telling you guys some of the dodgy things I have done........

Streaked / skinny dipped a posh hotel swimming pool - and got away from the cops but my disabled mate was arrested

Stood on the speaker stacks in a techno club jugging luminous balls - in exchange for free entry.

Walked / motorcycled / bicycled all over the world - asia, south america, africa, and visited nearly every European country (Baltic states still to do)

Held the hand of someone who was dying and done CPR for real

Taken my pleasures in simple ways - watching the sunset over the mountains of Scotland, riding my bike thru the scenery

Made risotto.

I got arrested for street surfing as well.

Talked a suicidal girl down from a rooftop

"Oi! you up there, jump ya bitch!"

and down she came

I've been on Romanian TV

Go Andy Powell! Just looked it up and I think he might be a genius. Great minds think alike I say!

Made risotto.

We have a winner!

I've done that too - joint first place?

I did some shopping once.

Wrestled a Pig
Ridden a Bull
Gone my whole life(so far) without drinking coffee
Played to a sell out crowd at Shepherds Bush Empire and other selected venues.
Appeared on Hollyoaks. 😳
Edit; Just for Torminalis 😉

Is Hollyoaks like Holyoaks but with an unfeasible amount of chavvy quim knocking about?

[edit]

Delivered my second daughter (with some help from my wife)
Killed, cooked, and eaten.
Slept rough in a large UK city.
Seen a teenager die in front of me.
Spent a couple of nights in custody.
Slept with a former high school teacher of mine.
Played county level sport.
Read 'Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintainance'.

P'eed in the middle of the night while staring at Everest in the moonlight.
Successfully sued a (ex)mate who owed me quite a bit of cash.
Fired a AK47 and M16 one after the other ... better than sex, well, it is at the moment anyway 😆
Went up in a tandem microlight thing, and said 'can it do stunts?'
Done a tandem paraglide in Turkey, and ... said 'can it do stunts?' (very close to vometing on both those occasions.
Ridden a motorbike through California with only sunglasses to protect my head.
Crashed a friends dads car, very long time ago this one, into a hedge at night when I said 'let's see what it's like if we turn the lights off?'
Spent the night in a police cell after trying to nick one of those big mobile crane things ... dunno why we did that, youth and too much ESB !

That is all for now.

I used to turn the lights off all the time over the west pennine moors relying on pace notes, as way, so we thought, of getting in the girlfreind du jours knickers..

Warra hot catch we were, eh girls?

Surf-Mat - Member

Made risotto.

We have a winner!

It changed me.

Been on TV
Rolled a go cart (after being told it was impossible during the safety briefing)
Curated an exhibition of my own stuff
Had some work published in a book
Entertained 200 people with balloons
Informed public policy
Been a ball boy for a premier league club
Flown first class
Shot a gun and bow and arrow
Slept under the stars
Broke into the olympic stadium in Athens

It changed me.

Add the stock too fast - sloppy mess. Too slowly - burnt pan. Just right - cracking meal. It is the sort of thing that can change a man for the better.

So why the **** did that guy win "The Restaurant" (Raymond Blanc TV thing) when he couldn't even nearly cook one?!!

Back to the original topic - my god there's some sanctimonious knob wavery going on here...

Yes I once saved an entire city by defusing a ticking atom bomb.
That was just after discovering a cure for AIDS.
And not long before swimming the Pacific Ocean twice.

Been chased (me on foot) by a herd of wild African elephants on a remote island in the middle of the [url= http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Okavango_Delta ]Okavango Delta[/url] in Botswana. Serious bricking it time.

A year later, was bush camping in Tanzania and was woken up by gunfire in the camp with sounds of people walking past our tents cocking rifles. Bricking it time again! (Turned out to be the Tanzanian police looking for a nicked truck - we were travelling in a truck).

Been called 'induraaaaaaaaaaain' by a crowd of lunatic drunken basques on a climb in the pyrenees.

Made it across 3 countries and one sea in less than 36 hours for the grand sum of £0.00 without performing any favours for lonely truckers.

Does a mosquito count as an animal that could realistically kill and eat you?

On a similar note, we was once chased through Bolton by a gang of black men intent on killing us, like Zulu it was... I never knew i could run that fast until that days..Out the back door of Astleys nightclub, across the wasteland, through a river and through Warmsleys paper mill back to Tonge Moor in a heartbeat!

Of those things that can be mentioned:

Flown Concorde first class (for free on business)
Eaten octopus in South Korea which was still moving
Lived in the Amazon
Been interviewed on Sky News as an expert on mobile phones
Cycled from my house to the most southern tip of Europe 😕
Had a novel published
Had my video about biking shown on Sky News
Been initiated at a secret tantra temple in Varanasi
Seen a funeral pyre on the Ganges
Smoked toé - the world's strongest and most dangerous hallucinogen
Been asked to perform two exorcisms
Been a guest at the Brit Awards, Mercury Music Prize and Sony Radio Awards
Hosted a party at the top of the BT tower
Had a colonic irrigation
Seen UFOs

And yes, I completed my Argentina 1978 sticker album 😀

Performed stand up comedy on TV
Was rude to Jimmy Edwards
Ran drunk down Mount ****
Windsurfed at Margaret River
Paraglided at Rhossili
Danced with Kate Moss (the Kate Moss)
Worked as a binman
Worked nights in a porkpie factory
Ran the KIMM/OMM with Ranulph Fiennes
Experienced the midnight sun in N Sweden
Had a chat with Rolf Harris
Been first on the scene at a couple of serious RTAs
Built a shed (a good one!)
Rode the TransAlp
Appeared in a film, a TV Drama and on a quiz show.
Stayed awake for 56 hours (without the aid of drugs)

etc etc...

I'm quite old though.

But I'm sure the best is yet to come....

Got the piano player in a 5 star hotel in Karachi to (try) and play 'Firestarter'

I havent posted on here the Ableton breakdown of how many samples were used in Smack my bitch up, have i?

Edited for blond moment

😯 at U31

I don't think much of this is willy waving - I did ask in the thread title, and people answered. Fascinating, it all is 🙂

The animal in question btw was a bear, and I wasn't really in much danger tbh. I could have run faster than most of the other people standing about photographing it. I would like to stress that it was a real wild bear tho despite the way it sounds 🙂

Oh and I also have had stuff published in a book. I wrote a chapter of a crappo budget book about the internet for a mate.

Flown low-level in a Tornado (passenger)
Flow a Harrier (second seat SnL only)
Flown a Sea King Helicopter (for 5 mins),
Flown to Gibraltar on a C130 - longest noisiest journey of my life, the landing was ace though,
Been Weighless (aircraft attempting fugoid),
Driven a car at over 150mph,
Sailed on a tall ship,
Been on an aircraft carrier,
Been underwater in a nuclear submarine,
worked within 2ft of an active nuclear reactor.
Met princess Diana,
Completed the Navy Leadsership course,
Seen people die 🙁
Wreck dived in the Maldives,
Seen the Easter parade in New Yok
Spent 2 weeks with the Royal Marines (music and combat),
Fired a pistol, 22 rifle, Vostok, SA80, GPMG.
Owned some nice cars,
Packed in a good job and career to persue a dream of going to uni,
Found myself in demand upon graduation,
Collected a great group of friends,
Married a great girl.

at 29, I've got a long way to go, but don't think I'll be famous like Simon up there.

Hired helicopters to fly up mountains so I could ride down.
Sky dived, microlighted.
Taken trawlers over the North Sea.
Travelled the world for 10 years.
Hunted big animals.
Had lunch with King of Spain.
Smoked a spliff in the dungeons of Windsor Castle.
Crossed several borders illegaly.
Fist car jouney after my test was to Barcelona.
Slept rough in UK and Israel.
Mimed guitar to about 100,000 scousers during the city of culture opening.
Been a bingo caller.
Got an honours degree.
Crashed a car and several mopeds.
Climbed some scary shit.
Had dreadlocks.
Killed a kangaroo.
Missspelt stuff.
Made cakes.
Had regrets but still glad I did it all.
Cried a lot when my dog died.
😛

Still lots to do.

Learned to drive my own car when I was 12.
Shot my mate up the ar$e with an air rifle.
Broke INTO school & nicked loads of gym stuff.
Had sex in the front of a Mini Pickup.
Fired an Accuracy International sniper rifle, a Heckler & Koch sub machine gun & a 9mm pistol in the same day.
Rode trials for 15 years.
Had sex with 3 different women in a 24 hour period (not that kind of period) (not hookers either)
Flown a helicopter, badly.
Sat in the front seat of a Tornado GR1

Been dumped on facebook chat......(i'm not over this yet)
Been Paragliding in Nepal
Beaten Bill Bailey in a drinking competition
Double orgasmed

That's it. i've never done anything else.

Wow you've all done some pretty cool stuff for internet forum finger waggers, well done chaps and chappeses, best thread yet.

Remember, we're all supposed to be fat IT middle managers...

Remember, we're all supposed to be fat IT middle managers...

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. [i]All[/i] those moments will be lost in time... like tears in rain... ooohh, it's time to log-off - pint, anyone?

"Remember, we're all supposed to be fat IT middle managers... "

No one told me that I'm in the wrong job......

I have googled "Tannhauser gate" 😳

But hey, jobs in IT come in handy sometimes, knowing how to google and all!

Wonder how much of it is actually true though (or at least not wildly exaggerated)?

I toned mine down a bit.

grum - Member
Wonder how much of it is actually true though (or at least not wildly exaggerated)?

It's all on the internet, it must be true.

Mine are VERY toned down, just trying to remember a few cool things really.

I once shot a man in Reno

Mines all true. some of the more scurrilous stories will remain secret tho

Rode a 1961 BSA to Moscow and Nordkapp in 1990
Maxed out my BMW R1100rs ( 140mphish)
Wheelied a GSXR streetfighter at 90 mph - accidentally!
Slept rough for months in Australia
Been on telly

I have:

a helped make happy family
produced 2 fine sons
remained true to my wife since the day we met
bought a home in MTB heaven
set up my own small but beautifully formed business
acquired sufficient toys to keep me amused
an enormous level of contentment

🙂