[Closed] Splitting the bill.

Maybe I'm tight or maybe I just like fairness and don't like being taken for a ride.

I'm not being funny, but if you don't like fish, then maybe consider going somewhere else other than a sushi restaurant 😆

And now we just do even more personal digs as folk cannot argue their point without name calling

Leaving thread it just gets insulting

😯 😯

You see insults where ther are no insult, you don't see answers where answers are given. And you're still not invited.

I'll give you a simple story to illustrate what I posted above.
I had a mate who always doged round, yet he was minted. One typical converstaion was along the lines "James, it's your round"
"Sorry chaps, I've got no cash" at which point he turned back to the person to tell them that he was thinking of buying a 60ft yacht.
He was incredibly generous in other ways.
If you only count the pennies at the table then you are indeed a tightwad and have no invitation to my table.
HTH. 😀

I'm kind of torn on this, and I guess the answer is "it depends." Money is only important between friends if you don't have any, something the bill splitters would do well to remember.

I went on a good friend's stag do recently. I couldn't really afford it, I've had a bit of a cash flow issue of late, but took the hit as I felt it was important to go. The group was, as these things usually are, made up of people from different circles of the groom's life so there were other friends there along with folk I'd never met before.

The evening meal was about a dozen people. I deliberately ordered frugally, skipping starters and only having a couple of drinks, whilst others knocked back heroic amounts of food and beer. At the end it was all "let's split the bill" (and it's always the ones who've consumed their own bodyweight, have you noticed?) and my response was "bugger that." So because of this expected culture I'd to explain why to a bunch of strangers (much like I'm doing now, ho hum). I paid for what I'd had, rounding up to the nearest note to cover the tip.

I think where I'm going with this is, it's an unfair approach if there's a large disparity between people's orders. With a group of mates it's not worth bean-counting for the sake of a couple of quid, but if folk are struggling then it's the nice thing to do to be sensitive to that.

As for "if you can't afford it don't come" - what sort of friends do you have? If friends couldn't afford to come out for a drink or a meal, I'd happily pay their way if I was in a position to (and have done so numerous times in the past). I'd rather have the pleasure of a friend's company and be down the price of a couple of pints.

This thread is right at the top of "most STW thread of the year" and it's still quite early on in the thread.

I'm so so so glad that most of you are no more than words on the internet in my life.

When I come up against the people like the teetotal vegan i simply just pay their share, give them their money back along with a condescending look and walk away from them.

Anyone with a calculator our saying right you pay £18.32, you pay £21.45, you pay £13.54, needs a slap.

Beancounting is irritating, true. But there I'd say they pay £20, £25 and £15 respectively.

When I come up against the people like the teetotal vegan i simply just pay their share, give them their money back along with a condescending look and walk away from them.

I expect the teetotal vegan would be very glad that you did. I know I would.

I have no idea, we won't be engaging on conversation again 🙂

Have you noticed almost the entire catering industry is run by sixth-formers and under 20s? They're on £3.87 and £5.30 per hour respectively. Get your wallets out and show some love on the tips.

Get your wallets out and show some love on the tips.

Assuming they get them off course.

*kicks over can of worms*

Cougar - Moderator
Anyone with a calculator our saying right you pay £18.32, you pay £21.45, you pay £13.54, needs a slap.
Beancounting is irritating, true. But there I'd say they pay £20, £25 and £15 respectively.

If there's only 2 out the 3 drinking, the 2 split the drinks. Easy enough to ask to have a separate drinks bill.

In my experience the people who do this whole totting up exercise at the end of the meal are generally the ones who earn far more than anyone else at the table.

They're just tight-arses! Pure and simple. Just tell 'em to **** off! Seriously. I would. Life's too short to bother with this type of nonsense

This. What goes around comes around. I spend my life being as unselfish as possible. Just been on holiday and didn't even go through the motions of checking we had all contributed the same. Whats the point - good friends will offer and make it right in the long run.

Those that insist on splitting equally and chase the penny are usually introverted passive aggressive types that your life could do without.

Why not pay for their better bike after all you are both there riding bikes. Why is it no longer fair?

I largely agree with you but think they'd have to share the bikes for your analogy to work properly ;).

funny thread, espicially this.

smiththemainman
Sadly we all know a "taker",
You can do me once , maybe twice but never ever again,

I used to be the sort of person who would try and work out what I owed but now I have enough money not to GAS, not baosting and I'm not wealthy but if you're out for a night out with drinks and everyone's having a good time who cares about another tenner. If they're your friends you can always mock them later, a few pints further on, with abondon.

Have you noticed almost the entire catering industry is run by sixth-formers and under 20s? They're on £3.87 and £5.30 per hour respectively. Get your wallets out and show some love on the tips.

At my friday night debacle the person who got their hands on the bill first demanded the 10% service charge was removed. This was despite is having a private dining room for 15, with 4 waitresses running hand and foot to us all night with excellent food and drink.

The service charge was £48 between 15 people. By the time they'd removed that then got everyone to contribute their own share of the bill, the staff were left with a £25 tip. 😳

Needless to say when we left the restaurant and it was suggested to go on to a bar, I made my excuses and left (apart from one of them, these people weren't actually my friends)

A grim experience.

"When I come up against the people like the teetotal vegan i simply just pay their share, give them their money back along with a condescending look and walk away from them."

My wife was once in a group containing a fundamentalist extreme vegan. After the conference/meeting they'd attended, they went out to loo for somewhere to eat. The vegan kept refusing to go inot places she suspected of having less than 120% veganity. At every place, she'd bother the poor overworked staff for at least 10 minutes on where their produce came from, is the soya 100% organic, etc. Won't go into details but it was a situation where the others couldn't really tell her to **** off, so they all bit their lips and went along with her nonsense. After over an hour and a half, someone finally cracked and insisted that they eat somewhere before they all starved. Surprisingly she agreed to go into a place that seemed far less than suitable (had meat on the menu!) and they all ate. 🙄

Me, I wouldn't have tolerated such selfishness from the start, and formed a splinter group and just found somewhere to eat and be damned with her. There's politely requesting others respect your requirements, and there's being a totally selfish ****.

At my friday night debacle the person who got their hands on the bill first demanded the 10% service charge was removed.

Seriously? That is absolutely ridiculous! And takes tight-waddery to a new level. I think at that point I would actually have told whoever said that to stop being a dick, and get their ****ing wallet out!

Seriously? That is absolutely ridiculous

Yip. I was very embarrassed.

Seriously? That is absolutely ridiculous! And takes tight-waddery to a new level

The background to my story

Me & my mate drove a minibus full of women over 1000mls over a 5 day period for a club we are members of.

We had our two 9/10 yr old kids with us for the trip

The vegans within the group insisted on cooking their food seperately to the chicken nuggets and chips the kids wanted. Normally we would expect 30mins grace so that we could get the kids food sorted and then let the whoreds into t kitchen. NOPE, kids didnt eat until they had finished prep which was sometimes 10pm.

Thing that really astonished me was the night we went for a group meal at an italian. Having done all that driving etc, i was happy to do the driving that night. It was raining and i happily dropped them off outside the Italian then walked 1/2 mile in rain by myself. At the dinner my pal who shared the driving had 2 glasses of house wine out of the shared caraffs. At the end they cracked the calculators out, divided everything up and had the cheek to divide a 4 glasses caraff by 2 to take into account my mates glasses.

We looked at each other in utter horror and were not surprised when we hardly got a thank you from the Vegans at the end of the trip. I will be going on the same trip next year but i will be driving myself and my daughter. Staing in relative luxury and keeping out of the pettiness that is Vegans.

This coming from someone who agrees splitting the bill is fair enough as i quite often make a pig of myself and wouldnt want someone paying for it.

Yep. What kind of restaurant doesn't pay its staff a proper wage then forces an optional charge on the customers. Tight wads indeed.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess you've never worked as waiting staff or behind a bar?

I'm sorry, but demanding the service charge is removed is epic bell-endery. If you have a problem with the minimum wage, and the social injustice of people earning it, then write to your MP, start a petition/crusade. Just stop being a dick/tightwad while you're at it

I'm sorry, but demanding the service charge is removed is epic bell-endery.

I take your point, but I find an additional charge added to the bill without asking to be offensive. Why not just add 10% or whatever onto the price of the food up front to cover any required "service charge"? It's just dishonest, making things appear cheaper than they are (and is easy to abuse, who knows where that money actually goes). Depending on circumstance, I might be tempted to boot it back on principle and then tip manually (sometimes more than the 'mandatory' charge).

This isn't America, the whole point of tipping in the UK is to give a little bonus to staff who've gone above and beyond. We shouldn't be expected to pay staff wages separately, the restaurant should be doing that properly already. We wouldn't stand for it in any other industry; when was the last time you tipped a well-performing supermarket checkout attendant?

Seriously? That is absolutely ridiculous! And takes tight-waddery to a new level.

"when was the last time you tipped a well-performing supermarket checkout attendant?"

Ok, so my shout for the 3.40 at Kempton proved to be wrong, but at least I meant well.

Massive devil's advocate and all that, but...

Me & my mate drove a minibus full of women over 1000mls over a 5 day period for a club we are members of.

Were you providing an agreed service, or were you just members who offered to do the driving? Could no-one else in the group drive?

The vegans within the group insisted on cooking their food seperately to the chicken nuggets and chips the kids wanted. Normally we would expect 30mins grace so that we could get the kids food sorted and then let the whoreds into t kitchen. NOPE, kids didnt eat until they had finished prep which was sometimes 10pm.

i was happy to do the driving that night. It was raining and i happily dropped them off outside the Italian then walked 1/2 mile in rain by myself.

At the dinner my pal who shared the driving had 2 glasses of house wine out of the shared caraffs. At the end they cracked the calculators out, divided everything up and had the cheek to divide a 4 glasses caraff by 2 to take into account my mates glasses.

we hardly got a thank you from the Vegans at the end of the trip.

keeping out of the pettiness that is Vegans.

This coming from someone who agrees splitting the bill is fair enough as i quite often make a pig of myself and wouldnt want someone paying for it.

I think there was some confusion over expectations. I think you went on a trip with some arsey and petty people. I think you expected drinks and gratitude in return for a favour that, perhaps, you might have given freely?

I'm sorry, but demanding the service charge is removed is epic bell-endery.

A service charge is the work of the devil though. It's most definitely not a tip by another name.

As I said previously, I'm all for the end of tipping as a default expectation with the living wage coming in etc. We are not America, thank Christ, and waiting staff are not paid literally pennies an hour and expected to make their salary up to a living wage using tips. In the UK tips are a bonus in addition to a wage.

Service charge is a nasty business though - legally different to tips with no need to pass any of it on to staff. If I must pay extra on top of the price stated on the menu I at least want it to go as a bonus to the people who made the experience good.

And yes, I did plenty of waiting and bar work in my youth.

I find an additional charge added to the bill without asking to be offensive

Usually it's mentioned on the menu.

It's a bit sad really this thread...in our land of plenty people are arguing over a few pounds...maybe we have too much as a nation and have become greedy...many poor countries I've been too have always shared what they have and wouldn't dream of just thinking of the 'me'....

I find an additional charge added to the bill without asking to be offensive

In the list of things to get worked up about in modern society, its not really registering with me.

Whichever way you look at it, demanding a service charge is removed while sat on your fat arse, filling your face, while people wait of on you hand and foot makes you an utter cockwomble in my book

In the list of things to get worked up about in modern society, its not really registering with me.

No-one is getting worked up are they? Just stating they find the charge structure unreasonable.

Well I'm with edenvalleyboy on this one. Whats 10% on your bill if you've had a nice meal? Seriously?

It just seems to be another thing that massively illustrates how petty, selfish and mean spirited a lot of people are. Some even wrap it up as some kind of ethical stance. Which is just bollocks

You going to take that shit, Cougar? ^^^^

😈

Well I'm with edenvalleyboy on this one. Whats 10% on your bill if you've had a nice meal? Seriously?

on a slightly different tangent, I'm a member of a country club type place, which adds by default, 12% to every bill for service.
I'm well aware that the tips don't go to the staff, so routinely ask for it to be removed and leave at least the equivalent amount cash. Seems to be very well received.

As for bill splitters anyone who gets a calculator out at a restaurant needs a good shoeing.
If however I'm out with t-total friend who doesn't eat much (he's now sadly moved to London), I'll often buy the dinner just so I can get a quilt free lift home!

just so I can get a quilt free lift home!

Duvet mind this arrangement?

bongohoohaa - Member
just so I can get a quilt free lift home!
Duvet mind this arrangement?

Whichever way you look at it, demanding a service charge is removed while sat on your fat arse, filling your face, while people wait of on you hand and foot makes you an utter cockwomble in my book

Even if you give an exact (or higher) cash equivalent to the waiting staff at the table? I wouldn't call it cockwomblery, I'd call it savvy tipping and the staff would thank you for it. But if you want to put the money in the manager's wallet instead you go ahead.

The thing with a service charge is that you have no idea where it is going to once you have paid it. Querying where it goes to and removing it from the bill if you are unhappy with the answer is nothing to be ashamed of*, as long as you ensure that you tip the staff that served you an equivelent amount.

* remember it might be fairly split amongst *all* of the staff of the establishment, including the ones you don't see in the kitchen.

...

Splitting by orders or into portions is fine, if done accurately (or erring towards generosity)

Not tipping is just tight though - unless genuinely sub standard service has not been given. And "This dish isn't what I thought it was because I didn't read or ask about it" isn't poor service.

Paying a bit more and subsidising others can save more hassle than its worth sometimes. What I hate the most is the same old people who sit on their hands at Cafe stops. They are quite happy to let others get a round in but when it comes to their turn they just sit there. They wait for someone else to crack but if that doesn't happen they get up and bid farewell or if they crack themselves then they just throw a few coppers on the table and plead poverty.

While the ability to stick to veganism in the UK does suggest a flair for attention to detail and perhaps even the ability to be assertive about your requirements, I've not noticed any correlation between lentil bake* and tightness in the arse department. All the vegans I know are generous to a fault.

*other less stereotypically vegan recipes are available.

You going to take that shit, Cougar? ^^^^

Heh. Stirrer.

Thing is Binners, you could argue the same about anything. What's 10% of your grocery bill for a week's shopping when the nice lady's scanned it all for you? Or another 15% at Kwik-Fit for the chap changing your tires?

I'm not arguing for not paying a tip, or somehow short-changing the restaurant or the staff. I'm arguing against the disingenuousness* of it all. If the cost of a meal doesn't include service, bump up the prices so that it does. If I want to tip extra, or not, that's my choice. And we usually tip generously by choice. We've tipped delivery drivers, hotel cleaning fairies and so on before now even. But adding themselves a mandatory gift of free money onto a bill and [i]deciding how much it is[/i] is just bloody cheeky. That's not a tip, it's a tax, and we're conditioned into feeling guilty for not paying it. It's quite the racket.

Also, 10-15% of a group meal isn't just another couple of quid, it can be a considerable amount. In our group of a dozen people, that would have paid outright for an additional diner with change to spare. "Here's your bill, by the way we've added on another fifty quid because we can." Screw that.

(* - is that a word? It is now.)

I've not noticed any correlation between lentil bake* and tightness in the arse department.

Quite the opposite, I'd have thought.

Once didn't pay the service charge because we had waited over an hour for dessert and got fobbed off when asked where it was. They got stroppy about it but had no one to blame but themselves.