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[Closed] Should I move out of the parents' house?

 poiu
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[#5442561]

Hi All,

There seems to be a fair amount of more 'mature' members on the forum so I thought I would ask for some advice from any parents of adult children...

Basically I'm still living with my folks at the age of 30 (yeah I know) due to a variety of reasons:
Left uni at height of housing boom (2007), didn't want to risk negative equity
Got made redundant after 2 years and changed careers
Gov' bailed out all the mortgages so prices didn't correct
Now the gov's inflating the prices again with government backed mortgages at least until the next election... and then it would be another 5 years or so for any correction if early 90's is anything to go by.

I think UK housing is dangerously overvalued and I don't want to be wiped out financially.

So what do you think I should do? I'm concerned that bad as the current situation is, if I get myself into negative equity and then (being pretty old) can't afford a family home in 5-10 years time then the folks wont be seeing any grandchildren which is probably a bigger deal? At the same time am I taking the michael by staying? Anyone got children in the same situation? What would you want them to do?

Cheers,

Poiu

p.s. I'm paying £50/wk to help with bills


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:25 pm
 Drac
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I'm paying £50/wk to help with bills

😯

Don't move out then.

On the other hand it's not negative equity if you can meet the payments each month, you could also rent but if the landlord says you can have pets be warned it's a trap.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:28 pm
 br
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What, do you think you'll find anywhere else to live for £220 a month?

And negative equity only occurs if your house sells for less than you owe on it - no other combination counts.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:29 pm
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If you get on the ladder then you have taken th efirst step. First time buyer sized houses/flats will alwyas be in demand due to the first time buyers. A lot of people talk about the need for the housing market to correct itself but will it? We've gone through a roughish few years and the prices are still "elevated", so i'm not sure, given the government involvement, that we'll see depreciation (stagnation much more likely) for many years to come.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:30 pm
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A number of things strike me at once.

If mine tries that (17 now) he'll be out on his ear long before 30.
Stand on your own two feet.
Try to think of your folks, do they really still want to be sharing with a grown-up man-child?
Rental properties are available.
Doesn't it bother you that your mum can hear you having sex?
Although, as you still live with her at 30, the above may not be an opportunity that comes along very often.

HTH.

APF


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:30 pm
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FWIW - All three of mine will not be allowed to stay for longer than a weekend after their 18th birthday.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:31 pm
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Rent. Millions do.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:31 pm
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Depends if you can afford to.

If you've only been paying £220 a month to stay at your parents I assume you've put away a massive deposit towards a house with the money you've saved!


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:33 pm
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Rent?

What's this fascination with having to own property in order to move out of the parental home? Some of the best years of my life were in shared rental properties.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:33 pm
 DT78
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Is this a troll?

Get off your ass, go and rent a place like the vast majority of people, learn to stand on your own two feet. Plenty of people do not have the luxury of living at home. At 30 I would be ashamed.

I had to leave home and self fund myself through uni at the age of 18....


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:36 pm
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I think you think too much.

Move out, rent or buy, no matter. House prices always go up, dips are only a problem if you want or need to sell. Buy somewhere you really want and stay there for ages. Or rent a nice place.

I assume you have been saving money for a deposit whilst you have been [s]freeloading[/s] staying at your parents.

I moved out when I was 18. A much as I love my parents the thought of living with them as an adult makes me shudder slightly.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:37 pm
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From your Morzine thread

Due to my mates wasting their annual leave on girlfriends I have a couple of weeks left over to burn. Question is if I go to Morzine for a week on my own would I look like some kind of offender or is it like skiing where some people do their own thing?

I assume your mates do not live with their parents. Making the connection?!
You really need to move out of your parents house!


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:40 pm
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Its up to you but in general i agree with the time to stand on your own two feet and sharing with mates was such a laugh.

Re renting that is your choice re buying you have no idea what will happen with house prices over 25 years or what your circumstances will be. If houses did not correct during the slump they wont do anytime soon IMHO
When I bought mine i worked out that if I gave it away at the end of the mortgage I had still saved over renting.

And negative equity only occurs if your house sells for less than you owe on it - no other combination counts.

This if it is your home what it is worth is irrelevant as you are not moving


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:54 pm
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So what do you think I should do?

Rent, obviously! Life is too short to live with your parents at 30. By the time I was 30 I'd lived in Wales, London, Manchester and Helsinki. There's plenty of time for mortgages.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 7:57 pm
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So what do you think I should do? I'm concerned that bad as the current situation is, if I get myself into negative equity and then (being pretty old) can't afford a family home in 5-10 years time then the folks wont be seeing any grandchildren which is probably a bigger deal?

Do you use [url= http://www.housepricecrash.co.uk/forum/index.php?showforum=47 ]HPC.co.uk[/url]? Your story seems a familiar one there - the good news is that you're 30 not 40 and don't seem to have yet picked up [url= http://www.housepricecrash.co.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=192096 ]the bitterness and misogyny[/url] that afflict so many on that site.

In brief, life is what happens while you're making other plans.

Get out there, rent, meet some ladies, get things going. Having followed HPC since 2005 - and then bought at the peak in 2007! - I now believe that the best thing you can do is buy when you can afford to independent of what you think house prices will do in the future.

Our house has just been revalued for mortgage purposes at the same price we paid for it almost 6 years ago. That lack of appreciation has no impact on my life whatsoever - but having had five years of becoming a part of the local community, of making friends, of doing the garden, has been wonderful - and most of these benefits would be claimed by renters as well.

Get out there and give it a try. Worst case scenario as you envisage it would seem to be 'buy house > prices crash > negative equity > can't remortgage > bankrupt' - and that's a darn extreme scenario (and I'd suggest if it happens to you then there will be plenty worse off still as the economy collapses!)!

Further, I'd say that it's still a far happier story than 'build deposit by living with parents > prevent being caught out by HPC by living with parents > prevent developing life by living with parents > die', which at present is an altogether more likely situation.

If you already use HPC UK, stop. It won't add anything positive to your life.

If you don't use HPC UK, go and have a browse (start with the 26 pages of bitterness thread I link to above) and realise you do not want to become one of them.

Life. Be in it.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:01 pm
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30 is pushing it a bit mate. Get out and rent if you are skeptical about the housing market. Frankly though, if you are worried about a housing crash, you will probably never buy. Noone is ever going to guarantee your investment. Get on a help to buy scheme and make the best of the situation.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:02 pm
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By 25 I was married and a home owner. Granted in a cheap area to live, but seriously 30 and still at home!! FFS!!! Loving the comments about your mates wasting time with girlfriends....it called living!!

Given that you are 30 and making the generous contribution of 50 quid a week to your folks as living costs, I'd hope that the world was your oyster in terms of getting on the property ladder!! Times yoir current bill of 50 quid by anything between 25+ to get an idea of the cost of running a home!


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:03 pm
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glupton1976 - Member

FWIW - All three of mine will not be allowed to stay for longer than a weekend after their 18th birthday.


+1
(although mrs_oab has a different attitude to her 'babies' - so I plan on taking her traveling around the world, so no home for them to return to...)


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:07 pm
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I'm the same age as you, left uni 2 years earlier in 2005, bought first flat in 2007, got married last year and will be moving to a house at the end of the year. You still live with your mum. Do you think you should move out?

Sorry if that sounds harsh and no doubt the financial aspects of the above have been tough but (admittedly based on the one post above) it seems like life is passing you by. As for renting, some of the best years of my life were living with mates in rented places, about 22/23 when we'd started earning but still knew how to enjoy ourselves!


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:08 pm
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Wow, just looked at hpc.co.uk. It is a right party over there isn't it 🙄


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:10 pm
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[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:10 pm
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Where do you live and work? I reckon we should all get house hunting for you tonight!


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:12 pm
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In other part of the world everyone lives under one roof as long as they can.

It would be considered rude or unacceptable if none of the children stay with their parents so usually there is always one that stay with parents. S/he will then look after them until old age or the eventuality of the parents departure from this world. Then after that the house will go to the one that stay and look after the parents before their demise. Or whatever prior arrangement they have.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:27 pm
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Jesus lived with his folks to around that age. Look what happened to him!

The OP earlier today:
[img] [/img]

😉


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:36 pm
 Drac
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Why a picture of Dave Anderson?


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:37 pm
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Living with your folks isn't an issue if it is part of a bigger plan, ie saving up a deposit. If you are planning to stay there until house prices fall into line with what you want you will be there until you die. Buy sensibly and you will be fine.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:50 pm
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You don't need to buy. Of course it's nice but it's not everything.

With regards negative equity.. It doesn't matter unless you want or need to move. Then it gets difficult.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:51 pm
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Get some self respect, move out.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 8:57 pm
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Life is scary and has no guarantees. Get out there and start living.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:20 pm
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Still at home at 30 ? must still need bitty

http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/littlebritain/characters/harvey.shtml


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:24 pm
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Houseshare


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:28 pm
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I lived at home till I was 27, allowed me to save a bigger deposit faster. I don't see the point in moving out just for the sake of not living at home.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:31 pm
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Unless your parents want you to bugger off .I went at 22 but still know people in their 30s and 40s living at home on the cheap


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:35 pm
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for what its worth mate I'm 35 and still live with my parents. you need two incomes to be honest on a normal wage and since i;m single I have no chance! do I care ....nope! as long as you are paying rent and not taking the piss living rent free I cant see a problem 🙂 in other countries its perfectly fine !


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:35 pm
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Jesus wept, I started paying my folks £40 a week as soon as I started working - and that was 15 years ago.

Good luck!


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:36 pm
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😯

Even living in a grotty house share was preferable to living with mum and dad, and that was at 18.

Yes, move out now, you are knocking on the door of middle age!


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:39 pm
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For a bit of balance many Greek and Italian guys I know lived at home till they got married in their 30's and it was no biggie. Your reasoning seems a bit odd though it seems sensible to just buy a place instead of paying someone else's mortgage. If my kids needed a home due to emergency at 30 I'd be OK with that but if they were mooching off me for 50 quid a week and never left they'd be out.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:39 pm
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**** me that HPC site is a barrel of laughs.

If your parents love you, enjoy you living with them and you genuinely help them out then I'd not think you were taking the mick.

If having kids and a relationship will make you happy then you should pursue that instead of hanging your happiness on a price crash that may or may not happen. Don't worry about making your parents happy with grandkids if kids are not what YOU want.

My kids? I'd want them to get out and live their lives instead of turning into 30-something Ebenezer Scrooges because of something they have no control over.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:40 pm
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I overhead a couple on the train the other day talking about their friend that had was house sitting for a very well of family friend. He hadn't paid any rent for 10 years, imagine how much he'd saved was the question.

If you're working full time and only paying £50 a week for bills you should be saving £500 a month a least. That's a fair bit and you should have plenty stashed away to move out.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:44 pm
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Two wages ? I managed it on one and paid maintenance in my 40s after a break up without running home in a crisis !


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:45 pm
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Edric64 your medals in the post 🙂


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:54 pm
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If independance is important to you, move out.
If you can bear the sound of your rutting parents, desperately trying to rid theirselves of a lecherous hanger on, nightly, then £50 a lifetime seems reasonable.
Man up and move out.
How can you expect to raise children when you can barely wipe your own arse?


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 9:59 pm
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You don't necessarily need 2 wages to move out or get a mortgage. It sounds like your making excuses about the housing market to stay with your parents. Fine if it suits you but don't kid yourself your staying due to the housing market.


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 10:02 pm
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Not really sure why you're asking random strangers where you should live?
Maybe you should ask mummy? (sorry I couldn't resist)

Ever wish you hadn't bothered starting this? 😀


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 10:07 pm
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Sounds like most on here are just jealous of the fact you pay £50 per week and no doubt get your washing done for you and your tea cooked when you get home from work.

i would carry on living the dream, and spend your savings on Hope team green components for your bike and Pogs (or whatever else kids spend their money on).

If you've got to much spare time on your hands, you could ask your dad if you can build a pump track in your garden.

Living on your own is just a world of misery involving endless amounts of cooking, cleaning and ironing, all because you're desperate to become an adult.

But make sure you move out before your parents are so old that you have to look after them!


 
Posted : 20/08/2013 10:10 pm
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