[Closed] Mates and their ex GF's...

You are lying in bed having a post coital energy gel

Ahh that made me chuckle 😀

Always happy to apologise when I'm wrong Junkyard but in this case I'm rather bemused by the tone of your responses.

I'll put it down to Monday morning blues, whereas I'm in a sparkling mood as I have the next 7 days off for fun and frolics and am about to give the 29er a spin 😆

If a mate had the chance to date an ex of mine, i'd like him to at least let me know so i can warn him of any head messing talents she may have, and of course if she was just the wrong one for me, then what a great girl she is and advise how to treat her to avoid perhaps mistakes i made.

Also to have a mate fancy an ex, reassures us that we weren't with an unattractive one, that is a good thing. In the case of the most recent mates ex, thats a year old and as others have said, he's moved on, but i think you should at least let him know you've become friends with her and would wish to she her some more.

Only you know how much of a mate he is, and whether you value your friendship with him enough to challenge his emotions, tell him, but don't ask permission, it's not like that. I'm quite sure he'll be fine about it, maybe he'll try to put you off if he thinks she'll not be good for you, or tell you to enjoy her.

What may become an issue is if you were to get together and a chance of her and her ex(your mate) meeting again in a group(non sexual)way, how tense things could get between an ex and his present GF.

But to be fair, that's not your problem, YOUR happiness is the most important factor here, so if he's any kind of mate he will be happy for you.

Mark, put yourself first and do what you wish to make YOU happy and to have fun, if people see you happy, ultimately people who matter in your life most will also be happy.

Enjoy!

Sharki.

I got the impression that the important thing was to make internet strangers think you had female 'options', with the anticipated ego-boost meaning you get to save the effort of doing anything about it?

iDave - that is really not very nice now!

I think Sharki may have nailed it... mboy the people that are important in your life, who also consider you important in theirs, will be happy for you regardless.

I have not nailed it, i wouldn't do that to an mates ex 😆

for emsz .

This thread needs to be left to die

Only a woman could be that cruel

is there a general rule when approaching it from the other side?

Or should I just stop analysing and get the hell on with it?

Oh come on!!! Surely it's not just me!! I mean really! 3 pages already and he had these two lines right from the start!!!

Still not done anything mboy?
*shakes head sadly*

Rather sweeping assumption wouldn't you say? I asked for opinions on here granted, I'm not about to provide you with any gory details should there be any!

This thread needs to be left to die

Thank you emsz, been wincing every time someone else posts something crass for days now! Definitely run its course...

Thanks for all the positive and helpful messages to those that posted them. And Sharki, you're bang on, nobody else has ever stopped to consider my feelings I can tell you that much... Which ain't easy at the time, though time is indeed a great healer and maybe everything does happen for a reason.

Sure, ok, but really, approaching from the other side and analysing, in the same post? C'mon!

Rather sweeping assumption wouldn't you say? I asked for opinions on here granted, I'm not about to provide you with any gory details should there be any!

Oh go on, STW is all about the gory details of strangers' lives.

You must have expected a certain amount of gentle ribbing when you posted this though?

You must have expected a certain amount of gentle ribbing when you posted this though?

10 or 15 posts certainly, I imagined everyone would have got bored by then though... Not 90 odd!

Oh come on... This forum is populated by IT professionals (virgins) and the middle-aged (eg me) .

Then you give convincing evidence that you have two women - perhaps road-tested by mates but hey... - who might be up for playing hide-the-sausage...

We live our lives vicariously through you...

So we need updates, pictures, swab reports and details...

FWIW - I think you should go for it.

This thread needs to be left to die

I'd feel it was a pretty poor show if a supposed mate of mine went out with a girl I'd recently broken up with.

mboy - the particular mate who went out with the girl 3weeks after you split, how do you know he wasn't sniffing around her before your breakup? Or he was already in there and she angled it so she'd end it with you then openly go out with him?

I'd never do that to a mate. Theres plenty of girls out there and unless you are sub-20yrs old you should have abit more respect for mates.

The crux there is 'recently', isn't it. If said mate has already found a replacement I'd wager she's fair game.

Goodpoint but depends who dumped who. If she dumps your mate and he liked her a lot then its not on.