[Closed] How to kill a pigeon?

If you're certain it needs to be dispatched then isn't just necking it the norm?

snap its neck. you'll probably pull its head of mind 😯

Don't throw stones at it because I put my shed window thro with a poorly wanged stone at a pigeon once!! 🙄
Oh and fwiw neck twist and yank is best.

just neck it - but don't pull its head off

Dislocation of the neck or cranial concussion

both are quick and humane

I watched this episode of peep show the other day!

"no tea for the beast master he feasts on the blood of his prey"

Bicarbonate of soda with some bread... 😈

Snap it's neck or use an axe.

Zulu, +1.

If it's otherwise healthy, it's an ingredient. No need to waste it. 😉

Put its head on the floor, place a branch over its neck, stand on the branch and pull the body.

get next door's cat/ dog/ ferret/ eagle to do it

A rather less gruesome method is to squeeze the birds chest for a few minutes. The birds lungs are very small and the bird will be unconscious in 20 secounds and then asphyxiate rapidly.
Please don't pull it's neck unless you have some idea! (messy endings)
Easiest method put it under a cloth and hit it with a heavy object. Do not look under the rag after this,just put all in the bin.
Please don't leave it to starve or be eaten alive by cats or rats,

Happy memories...

An efective neck pulling method is to grab legs. Quickly ( for humane reasons) stand on head and pull legs. 2 seconds . Head will be loose now. Method taught to me by game keeper for dealing with very flapping pheasants. Quicker than just stretching things a bit.

My mate Stuart , when we were at school threw a load of bread down in the town centre in front of the town hall. Then shot a ball bearing into the pigeons with a black widow. Obviously killed one. then left the dead pigeon on a teachers doorstep in a shoe box.

Got expelled for it.

Thats all

Margin, My mate Stuart......ha ha.... Which school did you get expelled from ?

smack it over the head with the frying pan then straight in it

Lay a trail of bird seed to tempt it to the edge of your house, then clamber up onto the roof and drop an anvil or piano on it.

IanMunro - Member

Lay a trail of bird seed to tempt it to the edge of your house, then clamber up onto the roof and drop an anvil or piano on it.

Ala Road Runner cartoon LOL !!!

What sort of a gamekeeper stands on a pheasants head and pulls it's legs??? 🙄

Having dispatched many pigeons (and other game), the quickest, most humane and cleanest way is to simply grab it by the wings and crack it over the head with a priest (or shaft of a hammer etc will work fine). Pigeons tend to tuck their heads in though, so watch you don't catch your knuckles!

I had a squab (baby pigeon) in the garden the other night, must have got caught out in a heavy shower and was soaked through and didn't look like it would make it through the frosty night. Quick knock on the back of the head and all done in seconds without the mess of blood spurting everywhere (which happens if you pull its head off).

What dashed said but push your dinger up it's arse if it tucks it's head in it soon make it's neck stick out.

Have you tried reading it one of the pro/anti religion threads?

mate They do this all the time ....it's just pretending to be wounded ... trying to draw you closer...when you get within range it will strike.

dinger!?!

As a teen I once had to dispatch an injured rabbit in the back field.

Being a bit squeamish about necking it I got a spade from the shed to take it's head off and in height of the moment missed and chopped its ears off.

At that point it squealed and hearing the noise our tabby cat shot out of the hedge and did the job for me.

You may have better luck with a pigeon as they don't have ears.

Our old cat was a nasty little blighter and often (read pretty much always) brought animals into the house in various near death states. I always used a garden edger as my preferred dispatch tool. Light enough and accurate enough to remove head in one go. Never any complaints from the animals so I assume they felt it was suitably humane

Is it dead yet?

Taser?

You can hire me. Once I shot a pigeon sitting at the top of a tall tree at 100yrds+ with a .22 air rifle, standing on a windy day.

Yes, me and everyone around me were surprised at the resulting puff of feathers, and I've never felt so guilty in my life.

Tut tut

No body said a keeper did such a thing!
I was told that that was a good way to do it if you couldn't grasp the head and needed to dispose of a bird quickly/humanely.

I once witnessed with my own eyes a pigeon killed by a fragment of clay pigeon. The guy who'd shot the clay was quite upset as he'd no intention of ever shooting at anything alive.

I came home once from the pub and found a pigeon on my settee. It had fallen down the chimney then shat on the carpet.

I was right p&ssed about it so I caught it in a cardboard box.

Took the box outside and jumped on it till it was flat.

Lifted the box up expecting to see a dead pigeon instead it was fine and just flew off!!

The Derren brown of pigeons!

Think I was on Stella that night 🙂

2 guys from work on the way home one day along the cycle track passing through Royal troon golf course, came across a rabbit in a stste of distress, reckon it'd been run over by a previous cyclist.

After much discussion, it's decided to put it out of it's misery.

Big fella takes a step back to have a right good kick at it's napper. Other guy just turns round in time to see dad, mum and 2 kids coming round the corner and witnessing two grown men standing, and one kicking a poor wee innocent rabbits head off!.

Scarred for life....

I was once mucking out a bull pen when som damn pigeon kept trotting about went to shoe it away with the fork, hit its head which then fell off. Made a right mess, i suggrst you smack it hard on the head and hope it doesnt fall off.

hhmm only ever killed a rabbit like this
it had mixxy, and was in a bad state I just wacked it over the back of the head with a spade. Poor bugger

Ex-gamekeeper from another life, pulling the neck is good for rabbits but you are more likely to pull the head off a bird. If there is a hard surface near by quickest easiest is to whack the top of it's head on it. Alternatively, use a priest / cricket bat, or if you are completely devoid of empathy use your thumb to crush the scull.

Or if your a coward fire it into next door using shovel

I once saw someone dispatch a Wigeon with the skull crushing technique above - using their mouth.. crunchy..

Is it dead yet or is it still flapping about the garden ?

Everything you need to know is contained here 😀

I can't believe nobody has yet suggested using the angle grinder or circular saw.

time to bring out the Bombers

[IMG] [/IMG]

"Once I shot a pigeon sitting at the top of a tall tree at 100yrds+ with a .22 air rifle, standing on a windy day."

Did that as a kid with a .177 once. Between 90-110 yard (judging by pellet drop, OS map and pacing) headshot from inside a barn roof overlooking a field. It was windy but I was prone and had already fired a ranging shot before they had landed. Didn't feel remotely guilty though, they were pests.

Didn't bloody know .177's could kill pigeons cold at that range.

A family friend who was an ex Belgian para laughed his head off and seemed rather impressed considering I was small....I had already learnt breathe control techniques to keep muscles as still as possible and my heart rate down....had even set my air rifle up to have a single stage hair trigger which you just had to brush to loose off a round..... he then went on to keep telling me I should join up as sniper, much to the annoyance of me mam lol. I miss the old days of me and my mates roaming round farms with guns lol.

Another friend once went a bit OTT and shut 70 pigeons in a barn then shot them all at point blank with a shotgun.

Vulture squadron

My cousin once saw a swan fly into an electrical pylon. Him and a mate got out to take a look and do the humane thing. They were prodding the "dead" swan with their boots and a stick when it recovered. Cue pissed off swan that decides the two people near it are responsible for its sudden stop midair and the inevitable occurs (sadly no arms torn off, fingers pecked off etc).

the inevitable occurs (sadly no arms torn off, fingers pecked off etc).

Did it break one of their arms?

I went out to it last night and it ran off at some speed, but didn't take off. Later we saw it in the garden with what we think was its boy/girl friend as they have been having some serious hanky panky of late. Anyhow both wings were tucked in and all appeared ok.

Got up this morning and the pigeon is sat on the fence looking all quiet and asleep. No noise roused it though, alas the poor thing was dead.

Sure it wasn't a parrot?

It's probably pining for the fjords.

Got up this morning and the pigeon is sat on the fence looking all quiet and asleep. No noise roused it though, alas the poor thing was dead.

It was dead standing up?

It was dead standing up?

Only because someone had nailed it there!

Yes, well stood/sat, good balance for a dead thing. I poked it to see if it was properly dead and it fell off the fence in to next doors garden 🙂

MY cat used to regulary torture birds and leave me to finish the job.

squash-head-under-the-heel was the quickest and easiest way for me. (Crunch-FLAPFLAPFLAP-done)

(tried the neck thing initially, but the head does come off and its not nice)

Aren't most birds 'protected' now? Don't know if pigeons are excluded, but I'm sure there can be some pretty serious consequences these days....say if a neighbour filmed you and put it on youtube....

RSPB would be the best bet. They'd do it for you and leave you guilt free. Everyone's happy.

Aren't most birds 'protected' now? Don't know if pigeons are excluded, but I'm sure there can be some pretty serious consequences these days..

Various legislation covering "prevention of suffering" which would cover you (assuming it was in a bad way) but didn't apply to a pissed student pulled the head off a feral pigeon in a town centre...

Lay a trail of bird seed to tempt it to the edge of your house, then clamber up onto the roof and drop an anvil or piano on it.

In any future occasions like this, remember it has to be an ACME piano or anvil to work properly.

On the contrary - in all the footage I've seen, no ACME kit ever works properly.

On the contrary - in all the footage I've seen, no ACME kit ever works properly.

Pigeons are not protected if they are damaging crops or property.

There also a countrywide fatwa on grey squirrels issued by the forestry commission, I believe although I am not sure you are perfectly entitled to blow their brains out as soon as they enter your property.

You need to watch the movie big daddy as they deal with the pigeons pretty well.

This thread just made my afternoon.

Shouldn't really tell you about the trick of soaking the ends of swan vestas in petrol so the head goes like putty, then squashing that into the back of an air rifle pellet.

Don't judge me, it was boring in the countryside with only a grifter to ride. Although that grifter was used to dispatch many a mixy rabbit.

Reverse the car over it.

A good story about dispatching animals. My dad got sick of the squirrels in the back field, that were being encouraged by the next door neighbours feeding the little sods.

So he bought an air rifle and started culling the population, Taxi driver stylee. One day he's got one in next doors garden in his sights, fires, but just winged it. Seeing it obviously in pain he nips next door to finish it off with a shovel. On entering the garden, he is confronted not by the neighbour, but the next-door-but-one neighbour from the other side, also carrying a shovel.

So my dad decides to fess up and says "listen, I've got an air rifle and I've just shot the little sod, so I'd come to finish it off"

"ah" says the bloke. "its just that I've got an air rifle as well, and I've just shot it too"

Its just occurred to me that I've never asked my dad who eventually did the honours

😆

Not much use to the OP but our late cat was like the Grim Reaper for local wildlife - mice, rats, birds, unidentifiable furballs - it caught a ringed racing pigeon one day and left it outside the back door there wasn't a mark on it.

Didn't really get started until it was six or seven years old it caught something one day and never looked back I guess it was the old blood lust.

Our cat (half Scottish feral) litters the lawn with rabbits and I can't speak highly enough of a good whack with my killing spade. Once buried, they do wonders for Asparagus in the fullness of time.
Word of warning, if you are woken up on your lie-in day by a distressed wife to despatch a poorly pigeon don't get in a huff and storm out in your dressing gown and break the nearest bit of wood over its head as you will then have to go back to B&Q to buy another kitchen shelf that was due to go up that day.

Considering the age of this thread, I'd plum for taking it to the vets if it's still breathing, it probably deserves it.

On a more sensible note, anyone will tell you that dropping an anvil from the roof is not the way its done - you need to drop it from a road sweepers dust cart suspended from a balloon.. Just don't drink the glass of free water when you pick yourself out of the hole you created on impact... 😀

Don't pluck the whole thing, no need. Just do the breasts, slice 'em off and pan fry for a few minutes. Serve with olive oil mash and a reduced red wine jus. Done.

My mate "Woody" had a bird jump into his MTB front wheel spokes when we were 18. Wasn't a pigeon though. Just like a sparrow or sommart.

Span round till it got to the fork then its head taken off like a cheesewire.

We reckon it was a suicide attempt. Made a right mess

When Ive had a few bevvies I always tell this story about pigeons, no one ever beleives me, but its hard to make it sound convincing when shandicapped. My mates just laugh. Its ****ing true, its amazing, read it !

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_Pigeon

Also see Bat Bomb !!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bat_bomb

your mates obviously don't watch QI

A mate and I were once minding our own business when a pigeon flew into a wall and collapsed to the ground. My mate was concerned and put it on it's two feet and watched it walking round in a circle, head lolled to one side. We decided to do the humane thing and my mate grabbed its head and twisted it right round. Having a broken neck this didn't kill it though, no resistance.

On his third try he put some right wellie into the twist and the head came right off! A truck driver sat in his cab watching, reading the paper and drinking from a flask spat his tea all over the paper. I was staggering about laughing hysterically. We walked away from the crime scene and later came back and saw a copper walking out of a bakery holding a brown paper bag out in front of him with a weird smile on his face.

Rabbits can be killed with karate chops to the neck. Saw a karate black belt do it once after chasing it across the countryside (poor rabbit zigged and zagged but the guy ran in a straight line and snatched it up, the shortest distance between A and B is of course a straight line)

Best suggestion: sharpened boning knife like slaughterhouse workers use. I still have mine in the kitchen cupboard waiting to put wounded animals out of their misery. If you haven't got one, then a wide chisel and hammer will do. If you're more Tim Taylor, then piss on it and then clamp on your car battery charger.

WHAT.

THE.

****?!

Do we have a serial killer in our midst?

........to put wounded animals out of their misery. If you haven't got one, then a wide chisel and hammer will do

ha ha , hammer and chisel FFS !!!

I take animal welfare very seriously. Got to do it the fastest and most humane way, none of this creeping up behind 'em, saying a prayer and slitting their throat. They rear poultry in big barns and if one has a broken leg the workers just lay their necks across the metal base of the walls and stand on them! Don't miss though. I once saw a turkey run over by a lorry and it looked real bad, head extended up and making plaintive peeps. There were grown men crying. One of the lads walked up with a knife and slit its throat and just walked away.

First, you have to catch the pigeon...

It's wounded? Flapping around the garden? In that case I'd just get the bow down off the wall.