MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
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Says the marketing presentation on the wall .
Can anyone explain ?
There's probably an over engineered powerpoint presentation on your intranet that will explain it all in clear unambiguous terms.....
Are they trying to break down silos and bring synergy to the organization hierarchy to make best use of SMEs and increase efficiency?
Sounds like your marketing presentation is just picking off the low hanging fruit.....
Can anyone explain ?
It's so you can optimise your synergies to effectively leverage your low hanging fruit. Obviously.
edit: Too late with the synergy and the fruit. Damn you, poor typing skills!
Flat planet?
Sell EVERTHING to EVERONE.
But in poncey, non-confrontational, marketing speak.
Too late with the synergy and the fruit. Damn you, poor typing skills!
See that's what happens to those who fail to globalise their verticals.
well, I excel at Verticalising my Globes. I is juggler.
It means engage with and treat your customers as they want to be engaged, i.e. as global companies, not as individual geographic entities.
I really hope you're an engineer and not customer facing!
A "vertical" usually means a niche product with a narrow customer base- it's not broad so it's tall. But "globalise" doesn't really mean anything. I'd assume they mean "Let's sell our niche product in lots of markets" but not necessarily.
Marketing dept needs a good dose of cleansing fire 'pour encourager les autres'. You know what you have to do.
You really need to ringfence the unicorn on this one.
It means engage with and treat your customers as they want to be engaged, i.e. as global companies, not as individual geographic entities.
It means exactly the opposite of that. The 'vertical' is where you treat customers specific to their, industry, geography etc.
Globalizing the vertical means identifying processes that can be delivered consistently regardless of the specifics of the vertical, which are not the customer facing ones.
Have you tried aggressively pulling on some change levers? Or perhaps pivoting your strategy on the customer's critical axis? That should bring some clarity.
I though this thread was going to be about the conservatives selling our airspace to the Chinese.
A "vertical" usually means a niche product with a narrow customer base- it's not broad so it's tall.
Wrong again. A vertical is a market, nothing to do with products, and simply describes a boundary within which you'll find companies or organizations with common characteristics. So Financial Services is a vertical, and so is Russia.
I though this thread was going to be about the conservatives selling our airspace to the Chinese
Too late, under TTIP it all belongs to US corporations now (as does the air we breathe).
Wrong again.
What is more enlightening is that no one seems to be able to agree on what it does mean, which confirms that it's basically just complete and utter marketing BS.
So Financial Services is a vertical, and so is Russia.
Both ex-communists with a thirst for wealth and power at the cost of the people?
phil56 - MemberWrong again. A vertical is a market, nothing to do with products
A market that's nothing to do with your products eh? Interesting concept. One that's sadly prevalent in marketing but everyone else realises that a market is just where you sell your product.
If both Financial services and Russia are verticals how do they overlap? Or are there no Russian financial services? Are they parallel or is one inside the other? What a bunch of jargon toss.
What is more enlightening is that no one seems to be able to agree on what it does mean, which confirms that it's basically just complete and utter marketing BS.
Actually, despite the evidence on this rather narrow vertical, there are a great many people who understand this completely, and use this understanding successfully.
It means whatever you want it to mean.
there are a great many people who understand this completely, and use this understanding successfully.
I don't doubt it. The problem is, they all work in Marketing or Middle Management. The other five nines of the population read pish like this and just go, "eh?"
It's problematic not just because it's obscure to most readers, but because it's perfectly possible to convey the same message in non-gibberish sentences. It's pointless obfuscation and I'm reasonably certain that people only do it to make themselves sound cleverer than they actually are. I mean, if you understand what "globalise the verticals" means, and no-one else does, then you must be cleverer than everyone else, yes?
I think I might start a Campaign For Real English or something.
Globalise the Verticals.
every agree on either feet or metres.
the end.
It means that the person giving the presentation has little faith in the subject matter and feels the need to dress it up in coded business jargon rather than using plain English.
*Makes note to take suicide pill if stuck in lift with phil56*
there are a great many people who understand this completely, and use this understanding successfully
aware of how cults operate.
apologies for the misspelling.
Sounds like/Reads like you work for a bunch of Wannabes.. 😆
To be fair, we need some context OP.
That said, as someone who works in marketing, I'm embarrassed by my own profession on a frequent basis 😳
The problem is, they all work in Marketing or Middle Management. The other five nines of the population read pish like this and just go, "eh?"
Which is perhaps why they don't work in marketing or management.
I don't think this is a problem of language or obfuscation though. I think it has more to do with the culture clash between functions in a company and the politics of territory. An engineer is as likely to want to understand what 'globalise the verticals' means as a marketeer is to want to understand the intricacies of a PCB (or an engineering equivalent).
It's the difference between responding to 'globalise the verticals' with 'sorry could you, for the sake of clarity, just tell me exactly what you mean by that' and posting a derisory comment about it on STW.
*Makes note to take suicide pill if stuck in lift with phil56*
What would the point be in that? You'd be better off making him take the pill!
Mmm, good optioneering, will task that.
An engineer is as likely to want to understand what 'globalise the verticals' means as a marketeer is to want to understand the intricacies of a PCB (or an engineering equivalent).
An engineer is highly unlikely to stick a presentation on the wall imploring everyone else in the company to constantly strive to "repolarise the triple overhead manifold sprocket" without a clue as to what that actually means.
Brooess opined "I'm embarrassed by my own profession [s]on a[/s] frequent[b]ly[/b] [s]basis[/s]" .
Don't do this it is a marketing symptom and it makes my teeth itch! 👿
"I'm frequently embarrassed..." surely?
- Cougar, Campaign For Real English, now incorporating Pedants Anonymous.
I kid you not; out with the CTC at the weekend and at the café stop some scumspawn started up with 'vertical integration'... Whilst it was a strictly correct use of this hateful phrase, over cake, in a café, with the auld CTC gits. Really? <sigh>
I think a little piece of me just died reading this. I'm going to horizontalize the vertical self-expanding natural entity after lunch (chop a tree down).
I'm going to get a poster made up that says "Balance the Stoichiometry"
You can't ringfence a unicorn... by then its toooo late!
Make Phil take the Pill.... thats my new slogan...
I'm going to horizontalize the vertical self-expanding natural entity after lunch (chop a tree down).
That doesn't mean 'chop a tree down', it means you are going to have an afternoon nap. Lazy git.
the last time I globalised my vertical I ended up with a nasty rash.
Can I honey bee on this?
(Once heard in real life!)
Its an easy win


