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Daughter bitten on ...
 

[Closed] Daughter bitten on head by another child at nursery today - advice please!!!

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It's distressing but not uncommon. My wife's a Montessori teacher and according to her this age is reknowned for these sorts of incidents. It's not for nothing they're called terrible 2's (and don't expect it to end at the third birthday either, depending on the child)

The problem is that they are old enough to know what they want and what message they want to put across but don't yet have the maturity, verbal skills, etc. to do that adequately. So they get frustrated and angry, and express that in the way they can; which is tantrums, tears, and in some cases violence. Particularly when tired. My 3yo, once she loses it is dead funny to watch - once the mist descends I've seen her pick up a fairy wand and chase her sister with it so she can hit her, and no amount of reasoning is going to intervene once that happens. Of course you have to intercept but often you're choking back the laughter as you do.

So as everyone else has said; before long your daughter will have clouted someone elses little pride and joy, it's part of learning and growing up. The nursery are there to supervise but they don't provide round the clock bodyguard services and while managing the other child more closely to prevent future occurences while he works out this isn't acceptable is one aspect, dealt with properly both he and your daughter will have learnt a valuable life lesson yesterday.

I'd far rather my 2 girls get get 'bruised' a few times and learn how to interact with other kids as a result, than be like my friend's child who has had very little contact with other kids beyond a very close (supervised) play circle, because he's going to start school in a year's time and have very few social skills to start with.


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 9:44 am
 Drac
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Some kids go through biting stages, some nip, some push, some hit and others are perfect angles and never do anything wrong (yeah right). The kid will stop it once he knows it's wrong.


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 9:50 am
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Keep an eye on your kid. If her skin turns blue and she starts trying to kill you and feast on your brains, you've got problems. 🙂


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 9:55 am
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I have no idea whether it has been suggested yet as some of the replies are quite in-depth, but I would say you should speak to the manager of the nursery and ask them what specific action they are ABLE to take and what action they ARE going to be taking at this stage. Ask them whether they have the resources to put additional staff on watch to ensure the chances that the boy does it again are kept to an achievable minimum. As has been said, kids do these things and it would be unreasonable to expect it not to happen but as with school, where much worse attacks may happen, those in charge have a duty of reasonable care.


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 10:15 am
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some hit and others are perfect angles

not 44.8 degrees, but bang on 45.


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 10:20 am
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what about spraying your kid with this?

http://www.vetuk.co.uk/index.php?main_page=product_info&products_id=1131

That way she/he won't get bitten 😉


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 10:30 am
 Drac
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[i]not 44.8 degrees, but bang on 45. [/i]

Oh crap! Lack of sleep.


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 10:40 am
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🙂 Made me grin on a slow friday morning!


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 10:41 am
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Hat seconded. 😀

I've never really examined a child. Do they have particularly sharp teeth?


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 10:44 am
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http://news.aol.co.uk/teacher-fined-for-biting-pupil/article/20090911030035545864504

Seems as if its not just the kids, be grateful hes not gota froggie teacher.


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 10:48 am
 G
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Bring back national service! Hang them!! Longer jail sentences!!!

We need to set an example and let these miscreants know that they can't get away with this sort of thing...... I blame the parents..... having children like this, if they'd just stop bonking none of this would happen!!

FFS get a grip. Kids do this sort of stuff, always have and probably always will. Its nothing, unless of course you are seriously suggesting that we should be considering excommunicating a 3 year old.


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 11:01 am
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unless of course you are seriously suggesting that we should be considering excommunicating a 3 year old

Is it a religious playgroup now?


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 11:44 am
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Are 3 year olds communicated?


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 11:57 am
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<Thread Hijack> (sorry)

Was the classic "owned him with my Bombers" thread ever recovered from the old site? I'd like to read it again...


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 12:44 pm
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I'd take off and nuke the whole site from orbit - it's the only way to be sure.


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 2:03 pm
 AB
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Thought some folk might like to hear about my meeting with the nursery today after my original post last night.

I asked for a chat with the nursery manager today who was only to happy to oblige.

I started the meeting by saying that I understand that these things happen and that they are only young kids who are probably biting more out of frustration and a lack of ability to properly express themselves than out of any malice or badness. I pointed out that I wasn't intending to be all self-righteous as it could quite easily be me here in 6 months time talking about how my daughter was doing the biting and hitting.

I was however keen to hear about their policy for handling these types of things. It turns out that the boy in question had bitten 8 younger children that day and when they had brought it up with the mother, they were told that the mum doesn't believe in shouting or strong discipline.

After they took the evening to think about it, the nursery have since said to the mother in question that they have a duty to provide a safe environment for all children in their care, and whilst they are not going to use any heavy handed treatment, they will have to keep a close eye on the biting situation. Also said that if they try and explain and demonstrate to the little boy that biting isn't acceptable and he continues to do it over a period of time they will have to re-evaluate whether he can continue attending the nursery. They did however make it clear that they are going to put an extra member of staff in the room to specifically work with boy and provide all the help they can - hoping the situation improves.

Me and Mrs AB are a lot happier.

Last thing I'd like to say is a big thanks to everyone who's taken the time to give me and Mrs AB some advice, it really helped form my thoughts and response when I spoke to the nursery manager today.

Much criticising and ridicule at times, but once in a while STW gives me a warm feeling in my tummy!


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 7:11 pm
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That's good news.

I recommend Rennies for the warm tummy feeling.


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 7:38 pm
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Like a little STW bun in the oven.....ahhhh


 
Posted : 11/09/2009 7:43 pm
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