[Closed] 8-year-old's inappropriate internet usage (boob content)

Sorry I can't be of any help but:

Worst of all, he's grabbed some gloves and started waggling them on his chest like nipple tassles.

😆

Coffee/keyboard interface...!

I'd be more worried about his spelling of naked...

Rachel

Nipple tassles 😯 **** me!

I'm going for 1. I don't have kids, but what they are able access on the web is terrifying!

Can't you put some form of parental control on the computer?

What's the inappropriate bit? It's what the internet was invented for. Safer than finding it in hedges.

2 and 3 I seem to recall looking at the undies section of catalogues when I was younger - not sure what age I started at

TBH I am more worried by the crying and confessing tbh as that does not seem the normal behaviour of a child - looks at own children knows this to be true

PS my eledest loves space and he once googled Biggest Black Hole - Google safe search is now employed

I'd be more worried about his spelling of naked...

And he's in the top group for spelling too!

Can't you put some form of parental control on the computer?

Yeah, we never needed them before. We've told him only to look at certain sites etc, but have clearly been too trusting.

I am more worried by the crying and confessing tbh as that does not seem the normal behaviour of a child

That's the thing - he's the kid who tells on others if they've been naughty... which isn't cool and has obviously lulled us into a false sense of security.

But, we asked him recently what he likes best in life, expecting something like Star Wars, Ben 10 or swimming. He said 'bikinis'. 😯

Now that I've stopped laughing...

How about asking what it was he was intrigued by* and going from there.

*Obviously he was looking for sexy, knackered women. I have one going spare.

Worst of all, he's grabbed some gloves and started waggling them on his chest like nipple tassles.

take him to a burlesque show...

You have got to love STW and the randomness of life 😆

Personally I'd go the carefully-worded telling off, followed by a denial of internet access for say, a week. That will give a) him time to think about what's happened and the possible consequences, and b) you time to start putting parental/access controls into place on your browsers.

Boys will be boys, we've all been there (well, if you're a bloke anyway...and possibly if you're a laydee too...). Have a giggle about it to yourself and let it slide.

If it becomes a habit and he's being furtive about it or deliberately trying to get access (perhaps on a friend's PC) then you need to look at more concerted action.

Option 3.

No point in attaching a load of shame and guilt to sex. Unless you are Catholic? 😉

followed by a denial of internet access for say, a week.

I wouldn't bother - he knows he's done something wrong, why make him miserable?

As for boys being boys - he's pre-pubescent, so boobies and whatnot are probably pretty meaningless. I expect he's just curious about these things he has heard about.

To be honest I'd be asking more questions of yourselves as parents an why you hadn't thought of putting some security on your Internet before now* (said in non sanctimonious way)

* my daughter is also 8 and I have nothing set up. Probably should change that as she's bound to get curious about the birds and the bees soon, and kids being kids, she'll use google before asking questions.

Try not to make too much of a big deal out of it.You've told him off & he knows he has done wrong,let it go at that.
Perhaps best not to let him on the pc unsupervised for a few years,8 is a bit young.

Although the glove/nipple tassles thing is hilarious & a great story for when he's older.... 😀

he once googled Biggest Black Hole

PMSFL!!! 😆

But, we asked him recently what he likes best in life, expecting something like Star Wars, Ben 10 or swimming. He said 'bikinis'.

You sir, have a sex pest on your hands.

<High five>

at the end of the day you can't stop them seeing stuff , as junkyard said even an innocent search can bring unexpected results , as I found when I googled " outdoor action " whilst looking for a camping store in Bolton.
I remember being quite shocked at some of the stuff my son looked at when he was 13/ 14 especially the " feed em up fatty sites , which seem to advocate a very unhealthy diet in young ladies. Best thing you can do is keep em grounded and try to react in a level headed way.

To be honest I'd be asking more questions of yourselves as parents an why you hadn't thought of putting some security on your Internet before now*

and...

Perhaps best not to let him on the pc unsupervised for a few years,8 is a bit young.

Hand. Slapped. Ouch.

You're right of course.

BTW, It was a really good nipple-tassle dance. Even in my self-righteous anger I'll admit the boy's got rhythm. 😀

This is the thread that keeps on giving. 😆

But, we asked him recently what he likes best in life, expecting something like Star Wars, Ben 10 or swimming. He said 'bikinis'.

Quote of the week already! 😆

Go all misty eyed, and start reminiscing. Tell him he doesn't know how lucky he is, back when you were a lad, there was no such thing as Google, and you had to find such things in magazines randomly found in hedges

Maybe send him out on a sort of Treasure Hunt. See if he can come back with a soggy copy of Razzle

Please don't take option 1. If my early exposure to all things sex/gender had been handled more supportively, then I might not have been quite so screwed up in the head in my 20s.

Ask questions, give honest answers and respect whatever he has to say.

Rachel

magazines randomly found in hedges

I grew up in Mid Wales. Hedges everywhere. Never came on a magazine though, and believe me I tried. 😉

😆 Ace thread!

"Never [b]came[/b] on a magazine" 😆

No point in attaching a load of shame and guilt to sex.

+1

He's done no harm and he'll see far worse via friends at school etc over the next few years.

Truck stops were the best places to look.

Erm.... apparently. Ahem....

Never came on a magazine though, and believe me I tried.

*Nasty*

Poor aim? Not enough pressure in the tanks?

Ask questions, give honest answers and respect whatever he has to say.

See, that's a toughie... because that's the conversation I've been dreading for ages.

Son (let's call him camo8) came home a few nights ago and told me that babies were made when a girl kissed a man on the ****. So his 8-year-old female friend told him.

Can I blame Google for this?

he once googled Biggest Black Hole

I've just tried that and the results are very disappointing [off to check if I have safe search on...]

*Nasty*

Intention good. Aim bad. 🙁

Well in situations like this I ALWAYS BLAME THE PARENTS!
Leave the boy alone and have a word with yourselves. Better parenting skills are the answer.

We had a porn bin at a bus-stop when I was a kid. We inherited from the older brother of one of the lads. I passed it on to my brother. It provided a dozen specialist periodicals every week for at least a decade.

A septegenarian member of the Orkney Traditional Dance Group Googled 'balled yarn' as she'd run out on a jumper she was knitting. Her eyes were well and truly opened 😯

EDIT Just googled it to check myself, it wasn't so bad. Perhaps it may have been a spell checked derivative thereof.

Leave the boy alone and have a word with yourselves. Better parenting skills are the answer.

* Sigh *

Visions of getting centre-spread in Good Parenting magazine fade into disillusioned ruins.

I think you need to embrace his curiosity and celebrate with some pagan mime, if that fails thrash the little pervert

He's a curious child, and it sounds like what he found got too serious, probably its the result of playground talk. But the nipple tassles is not that worrying, we had a prudish teacher when I was that age who got border line hysterical because we put footballs up our jumpers and pretended to have boobs. He's mimicking what he saw, probably in an attempt to understand it.

Mixture of 2 and 3. 1 would risk him hiding stuff from you.

Yes i just re did it as well and I wonder if google have done something with the search term- was perhaps 6-12 months ago he did it

I think he said video as well - he watched the videos on the hubble site but that is equally "disappointing"

Intention good. Aim bad.

Surely this is where 'the crescent' comes in handy*

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*pun fully intended 😆

Agree with Rachel. Can you avoid attaching guilt and shame to sex? Parental controls on the Internet and a manly chat would be my approach. Save he nipple tassel dance story for a wedding speech.

Visions of getting centre-spread in Good Parenting magazine fade into disillusioned ruins.

PLEASE MAKE IT STOP! 😆

Wait until he gets back to school after the holidays and tells all his mates about it.

They'll all be googling inappropriate stuff when they get home.

"But littlecamo16's Dad lets him do it!"

you could treat this like parents who deal with their kids smoking by forcing them to inhale a whole packet of the most disgusting cigarettes in one go....

just introduce him to hora.

If it was me- a programme or some serious internet security with his use supervised.

More importantly I'd want to find out where/how he arrived at this search activity. Where the seeds of thought started. Do you let him watch TV after 9 etc? Does he have his own tv? Peer pressure? etc etc.

When I was a kid the trail left was the littlewoods cataloge flopping open at the ligerie section.

Whats the difference (appart from the nipple tassles 😀 )

Where the seeds of thought started.

He's a dude. Do I need to look any deeper than that?

To be honest I'd be asking more questions of yourselves as parents an why you hadn't thought of putting some security on your Internet before now*

Don't bother, if he can't get porn on his own he'll just get his mates to email it to him. Educate him, quiet talk about what's on the net, the possible dangers, etc. And if you're worried about it move the computer to a more public area of the house.

More importantly I'd want to find out where/how he arrived at this search activity. Where the seeds of thought started.

Perhaps, just perhaps.....

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I'd want to find out where/how he arrived at this search activity.

Cos he's got eyes and ears and lives in the world?

You can't fight it. Why bother? It's part of life.

When I was that age, I was curious about all things, but there was nothing pervy about sexy stuff, cos it was meaningless to me. I was not equipped to get turned on. Sex was something that grownups did, along with other strange things.

I'm honestly surprised that parents are allowing their children uncensored and unsupervised access to the internet. 😯

Perhaps 2 girls 1 cup would put him off for life?

I'm honestly surprised that parents are allowing their children uncensored and unsupervised access to the internet.

In our defence, we don't usually. We're there with him almost every time he uses the computer and when we're out of the room for a few minutes we check on him regularly.

I guess he asked us when we were both half-asleep and we trusted him enough not to think that his morning would lead to nipple tassles.

Can I blame Google for this?

I'm sure there's a shonky legal firm who would be willing to find out for you.

I'd be more worried that he owned up & was crying about it. It seems to me that he's got an overdelveloped sense of shame already - are you Catholic? Perhaps you need to be a little more open in talking / displaying bodily functions.

If you're constantly checking in him (see the post 2 above), then you may be too controlling. Do you let him play out of doors much?

I'd tell him that there's nothing wrong about being interested in women, but it's best to wait until he's older, then quietly put the controls on the computer.

I'd be more worried about his spelling of naked...

We've just had another look through the search history and it's encouraging to notice that he spells 'bounce' correctly. And 'boobies'.

* Suspects that an initial version of 'the talk' is required *

I'm honestly surprised that parents are allowing their children uncensored and unsupervised access to the internet

Why? My eldest (13yrs) has a computer in her room: I've taught her about the dangers of the net, that you don't know who's on the other end, you don't know where any photo or mail you send could end up, etc. She also knows that if there's a problem we will look at her mail, Tuenti account, her telephone and so on. I know my daughter, and I trust her enough that I can't see any need for greater measures.

I'd be more worried that he owned up & was crying about it.

That seems to display a good sense of responsibility and honesty. And no I'm not catholic.

If you want to make it difficult for him to 'accidentally' find inappropriate sites you could change your dns servers to those supplied by [url= http://www.opendns.com/opendns-ip-addresses ]open dns[/url]

Not foolproof but it will help. Google also has safe search settings that include their others sites such as youtube.

I've taught her about the dangers of the net

Ditto.

Having said that, we've never upped security on Google. 😐

I'm with mogrim.

I haven't gone as far as to put the Microsoft parental controls on so I can see my sons complete internet history but he knows I can.

My daughter doesn't really do much on the internet bar moshi monsters but she's aware that she mustn't talk to strangers.

Internet history.... Not heard of private browsing or incognito or porn mode?

Handle it carefully though- its not a 'bad' thing that hes doing. Just waay too early. I'm not going to allow own TV signal or own internet access for hora junior. He can already open everything/navigate around at 2 so I imagine at 8 he'll be five steps ahead of me on Tech though 😯

Yep, don't fight it, roll with it. I put parental controls on when the twins were that age. I'm not sure 8 years old and wondering about boobies is much to worry about. My two came home from a Year 6 field trip with stories of one girl doing a lap dance. It's all just normal healthy curiosity, but the danger is that the internet contains all the machinations of the sewer that is humanity, so you need to restrict his access and talk to him in a trusting adult fashion. Let's face it, he googles boobies and comes up with tassles, yet only needs to hear a different search term from his mates to dredge up a bit of bestiality or scat... the internet isn't very discerning, so for his own sake and your peace of mind you need to address it.

At the other end of the scale I had a fantastic moment when I borrowed my 15 year old lad's laptop and discovered he hasn't disabled autocomplete in his address bar. That was half an hour's piss- taking and watching him squirm that I wouldn't have missed for the world. 😈

8 years old.... go for the full on sex chat, better the truth than believing babies are made when a lady blows on a mans **** surely?

The other thing is that my daughter also has a mobile phone, then we've got a tablet, there's the main home computer, etc. Life's too short to be searching out Blackberry, Android, Windows and Linux internet security packages - given how ubiquitous internet access is today, the [b]only[/b] real solution is education.

Still not sure about the bikini thing though. And I need to get the machiato off the keyboard.

8 years old.... go for the full on sex chat, better the truth than believing babies are made when a lady blows on a mans **** surely?

Definitely!

We can filter his searches on Google, but we can't filter his conversations in the primary school!

BTW, the way camo8 heard it, it was kissing, not blowing. 😯

Still not sure about the bikini thing though.

See, that's one thing that my boy is sure about.

Two years ago, we used to go to the beach to, you know, build sandcastles, shrimp, play in the waves. Last summer I swear he only agreed to come along so he could check out the honeyz. 8)

BTW, the way camo8 heard it, it was kissing, not blowing.

See, that's one thing that my boy is sure about.

Two years ago, we used to go to the beach to, you know, build sandcastles, shrimp, play in the waves. Last summer I swear he only agreed to come along so he could check out the honeyz.

Ah, I thought you meant he was thinking of ordering some.....

Presumably first you have to check out what's hot and what's not, before ordering.

I'd be more worried that he owned up & was crying about it.

That seems to display a good sense of responsibility and honesty. And no I'm not catholic.

I agree. I like that he came to fess up. I like it less that he Googled at least 10 variants of boobs, nacked ladies, sexy, sex, bounce boobies etc.

But then, as a guy, I'll admit that such interests are natural. Think I started later than 8 though.

nacked ladies

Given the colloquial usage of 'nacked' - broken, ruined, not fit for purpose - I wonder if this was the search that brought about the tears...

At least you know which side of the fence he's on!

I reckon that you should take him out for a slap up dinner, or at the very least not make a big deal of it - its entirely natural, maybe just a little early - but that may be down to friends or something he's heard somewhere.

He knows he's done wrong, leave it at that.

maybe he needs a hobby, something to keep him off the internet a bit - Magic maybe?

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UPDATE: well, we've managed to have a long chat with the little fella, after hours of the 'you-don't-love-me-so-I'm-storming-off-to-slam-a-door' antics.

He is truly sorry.

Turns out they (he and his buds) were all chatting during a kids' party yesterday... which obviously centred his attention on the boob.

Now, all kinds are coming out - one kid told him that boys have babies in their testicles (he calls them 'ollies' though), which is why you have to look after your nuts. Said kid was not sure how the baby is 'tranferred' though. 😯

So, in the short term he's learned his lesson and we've chatted to him straight about some of the things that are going on in his head.

Is it too early for the full-on sex education chat, or am I missing the moment?

I thought schools did the whole 'mechanics of reproduction' thing before they were this old now?

I thought schools did the whole 'mechanics of reproduction' thing before they were this old now?

Some schools do. A friend's kid got the basics aged 5. 😯 Our boy's school seems to be taking its time.

@ rattrap - 😆

I'll suggest that. He loves magic with a nice surprise at the end!

Is it too early for the full-on sex education chat, or am I missing the moment?

By the sounds of it right now would be good time to start.

And thank god I've got daughters, and can delegate the whole thing to my wife 🙂

I'll suggest that. He loves magic with a nice surprise at the end!

Everyone loves a happy ending.

Everyone loves a happy ending.

Totally. I'm always up for a big finish myself.