suburbanreuben’s post reminds me that John Bindon used to drink in the pub opposite when I lived in town; there was apparently a picture held safe in a bank of him and the Queen’s sister that featured her holding his chap on which was piled a few stacks of two bob bits.
On that basis, the royal measurement is ten pence pieces laid in a row along the top.
Many moons ago one of the lads mags (probably Loaded) did an article ‘re pork stars and various length/girth stats. Helpfully they printed a ruler with markings showing where various stars, such as Ron Jeremy (Not that far iirc) of the genre got up to (phnar, phnar). They explained that the measurement was along the top. Naturally it fell upon me to see how I measured up to these legends of the dark arts (having the lights off helps if you’re prone to artistic licence). The results where most disappointing. Until I realised that said printed ruler wasn’t to scale and I was able to conduct the experiment (helped now by then girlfriend) again, under proper scientific conditions, with marginally better results. Naturally I wrote to the magazine to complain and the b*st*rds only went and printed it..
EDIT – was going to edit “Pork” but on reflection it seems to be quite fitting..
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