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Ladies - your advice please!

41 posts & 27 voices | Started 2 years ago by Kit | Latest reply from waynekerr

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performance anxiety

Pages: 12 Next »

Kit - Member

Is asking someone out on a date over the phone a no-no? Its someone I know quite well (ex neighbour), rather than being an acquaintance. I know its better in person but I'm struggling with being chronicly shy and never seem to find the right time to ask her out on a date when we're just hanging out Asking her out on the phone might be a little easier! I guess if I really thought she'd say yes it wouldn't be a problem, but I think she'll say no and I'd be gutted, frankly!

Yours soppily,
Kit

Posted 2 years ago #
Pigface - Member

MTFU Feint heart never won fair lady, best face to face I would say.

Posted 2 years ago #
Kit - Member

best face to face I would say

I know, just wondering to safe the embarrassment.

Posted 2 years ago #
mastiles_fanylion - Member

Do it however makes you feel most at ease - if the feeling is mutual she won't be put off by you using the wrong technique.

That comes later

Posted 2 years ago #
cinnamon_girl - Member

Go for it! If you feel more comfotable that way, then I don't see the problem.

Posted 2 years ago #
clubber - Member

Phone's fine. I originally asked my wife out by phone (though admittedly I wouldn't have really seen here elsewhere to actually ask her in person).

Posted 2 years ago #
Munqe-chick - Member

I would say phone is okay too, if that's what means you're most comfortable to begin with then go for it! I wouldn't be p**d off! I got asked out by text message once, didn't offend, didn't go (but that's because I wasn't single!).

Posted 2 years ago #
Smee - Blocked

Phone is fine. Text and email is also acceptable.

Posted 2 years ago #
PeterPoddy - Member

However you do it, just DO IT! You'll regret it if someone else gets there first.

Posted 2 years ago #
CaptainFlashheart - Member

I simply can't believe that no one has done this yet;

or has she "got a really nice personality"?

Posted 2 years ago #
Rickos - Member

The worst that can happen is she says no. So what? She'll most likely take it as a compliment at least (unless you're a complete wierdo).

Posted 2 years ago #
nicko74 - Member

"got a really nice personality"?

Remember the personal ads codebook:
- bubbly/ a whole lot of fun/ well-rounded (large)
- can handle responsibility (got kids)
- looking for the right man (desperate)

Posted 2 years ago #
simonfbarnes - Member

Kit would like to be a wierdo but he's too nice

Posted 2 years ago #
Kit - Member

or has she "got a really nice personality"?

She's got a couple of nice 'personalities' nudgenudgewinkwinknowhatImean? But seriously folks. She's bloody gorgeous, and I'm not a wierdo (thanks Simon!) so fingers crossed, eh?

Posted 2 years ago #
breatheeasy - Member

Well if she's an ex-neighbour you presumably have already spoken to her (or at least seen her) face-to-face....

Give her a bell, even just to leave her your number just in case she ever fancies a drink sometime and a catch-up. Sure that'll be 'code' enough for a subtle woman to realise she was been asked out for a date!

Posted 2 years ago #
PeterPoddy - Member

Well, have you rung her yet then? Update required!

Posted 2 years ago #
Reluctant - Member

Do it by whatever means you feel comforable with. If she's as lovely as you say, it's worth the risk. She can only say no - nothing worse. I remember being rejected by someone I really fancied - but I still felt "brave" about having tried! Go for it, you've nowt to loose!

Posted 2 years ago #
CaptainFlashheart - Member

She's got a couple of nice 'personalities' nudgenudgewinkwinknowhatImean?

Pictures, gaddammit, pictures!

Posted 2 years ago #
odannyboy - Member

just make it casual and off the cuff.
dont go "hi, will you go out with me?"

Posted 2 years ago #
xc-steve - Member

I reckon you should stick with the times and create a facebook invite... she'll think your cool and hip and definitely fall for you...

I definitely didn't propose to my wife over facebook!

Posted 2 years ago #
bruneep - Member

defiantly

Posted 2 years ago #
satsoma - Member

Over the phone is fine! It makes it much less awkward and you can make it sound nice and casual.

However, make sure you prepare yourself if you get the answering machine...

When are you ringing her?

Posted 2 years ago #
Kit - Member

I think she has has her pole dancing class tonight, so will call tomorrow

Posted 2 years ago #
satsoma - Member

I think she has has her pole dancing class tonight, so will call tomorrow

Okay, I'm a girl and even I want to see pictures now!

Posted 2 years ago #
timc - Member

just knock round out the blue after work & ask her...

Posted 2 years ago #
ononeorange - Member

XC-Steve - that's cool, but your wife's response is just brilliant!

Kit - go for it!

Posted 2 years ago #
Kit - Member

Okay, I'm a girl and even I want to see pictures now!

Interesting... I've done some internet stalking and found a photo of her online. Not telling you lot where though

Posted 2 years ago #
Bunnyhop - Member

Ring her up, it's fine by phone.
Just casually say, hey it would be great to catch up, how about a drink. Make sure though you make a definite date.

Good luck.

Posted 2 years ago #
meehaja - Member

best piece of advice I ever got was off a scary barnsley lass, who told me of her friend "She'll never sleep with you if sit there looking miserable, so dance like a loon, at least then someone will sleep with you. or punch you."

nice place barnsley, but she had a point, doing nothing gets nothing done, put your balls on the line and ask her face to face (its harder for her to turn down). If she says no, say "fair do's, wanna go for a pint and gossip about the best way to ask you out?"

Posted 2 years ago #
CaptainFlashheart - Member

timc - Member
just knock round out the blue after work & ask her...

Back door?

Posted 2 years ago #
joolsburger - Member

I'd say be direct and honest, tell her you'd like to take her out for dinner or somesuch and make it clear you like her, phone is fine. Don't add any caveats either confidence is attractive in people.

Something like I've been wanting to ask for ages if you'd like to go out for a drink or dinner sometime.

Simple and to the point!

Posted 2 years ago #
Kit - Member

Well I asked, and got turned down (in the nicest possible way, natch).

Ah well...

Posted 2 years ago #
SBrock - Member

move on mate and don't dwell on it!

I have been turned down once or twice but didn't take it personally!

Posted 2 years ago #
cinnamon_girl - Member

Oh that's bad news Kit. But you tried and that's the important thing. Stay upbeat and positive and don't take it to heart.

Posted 2 years ago #
grynch - Member

ya, chin up and all that.. at least you asked her.

I was really shy myself ( now I'm married so it doesnt matter *L* ) and I know how much it takes to work up to ask someone out.

Posted 2 years ago #