I was showering this morning and when I came to turn the water valve clockwise, to off, I wondered what had prompted me to consider my shower was complete.

I certainly didn’t time it. Perhaps I’d completed a subconscious ablution protocol but why I decided to leave the shower I don’t know.

Any thoughts you lot?

Boredom normally.

Once youve washed the wee of your feet?

Usually when I’ve finished my beer.

a subconscious ablution protocol

this.

unless I’m cold from riding in which case it’s when I can not only feel my feet again but they’ve stopped hurting from warming up.

There are only so many times a man can wash his penis in one session.

When it starts going cold.

when I’ve finished pushing the jobbie down the plughole with my toe..

ejaculation

When the taint meat is clear of suds.

three button presses
1. soaked
then soap
2. rinse
3. rinse

This forum is poulated by wrong ‘uns. 🙁

Once I’ve finished my wash routine I’ll stand there and rinse for a minute then get out. I think the biggest determining factor to length of shower, is how long it takes me to start washing from getting in. Usually it’s more or less straight away, but if I’m particularly cold, tired, hungover, mulling things over after a fight with the wife, then I just let the water warm and relax me for a while first.

when i have washed my feet I have finished and I leave.
As above if I want to relax it happens pre clean

There are only so many times a man can ‘wash’ his penis in one session.

Fixed that for you

when I’ve finished pushing the jobbie down the plughole with my toe..

Ha!

miketually – Member
There are only so many times the wife will ‘wash’ my penis in one session.
Fixed that for you

i think you’ll find this better

I try to get as long as possible in there before my wife bangs on the door and complains about me wasting water.

My son eats his toast in the shower if he is running late. The knob.

There are only so many times a man can wash his penis in one session.

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCW10ZwUlwc[/video]

it’s all downhill from here.

I get out only when I’ve used all the hot water up, takes about 1/2 hour on full chat (power shower, large head) If I’ve been riding and am muddy/grimey/cold I start off warm progressivly turning the dial to “Kettle Boiling” temp then back off .4 of a turn and subsiquently blast the grout off the tiles until I can’t breath because of all the steam.
Only then do I step out.

When you’ve finished reading your flyer

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UgV7hnjoyt0[/video]

If I come across an ultra-powerful very hot shower I’m afraid I’ll only stop the shower after all my skin has been seared and flayed off my body.

You can’t beat an ultra-hot ultra-powerful shower.

If its a standard B&B shower I’ve got it down to 10seconds.

If I’m not sure I ask on here

Northwind – Member
If I’m not sure I ask on here

New thread: I am currently in the shower. Have I finished?

when this happens…

I tend to get nosebleeds quite often (no underlying problems or drugs) and when they happen in the shower (maybe when I’ve rubbed my nose too hard) it looks like a scene out of Psycho, blood everywhere.
The main problem is that it’s quite impossible to stop the blood flowing in the shower, and you can’t get out with blood dripping everywhere and covered in soap. So I have spent AGES in the shower sometimes when this happens!

Only solution I found was to reach for the toilet roll and grab a load and stuff it up my nose!

Sidney – Member

When the taint meat is clear of suds.

LOL and +1.

Once I’ve placed my jobbie in the soap dish

I can’t masturbate stood up so I can’t use that as a reminder to get out.

Blinkin’ ‘ell. Some very unsavoury responses here.

You’ve pleased me.

Once my nipples are stinging in pain because I’ve set the shower to boiling hot. So about 20 mins twice a day. Every other day.

Fantastic 😀

Guilt. I wait until I start thinking I’ve been in there too long. Despite the extractor spinning its nuts off, you can’t see your hand in front of your face be ause of the steam.

No self abuse in the shower. Warm water and protein really doesn’t mix.

I don’t like showers too hot but ours does go pretty hot as I find out when I get in after the wife.

I do like to just stand under the water, I prefer to do this with my eyes shut but the last time I did this I fell over and ripped off the curtain.

I do like to just stand under the water, I prefer to do this with my eyes shut but the last time I did this I fell over and ripped off the curtain.

Ha!

Again. This thread has so far delivered, twice.

Bend your knees slightly for better balance when eyes are shut

Stand and get warmed through
Soap and wash everything starting at the top
Rinse a bit more
Remember feet – do feet
Cold Blast?
Squeegee the excess water from my pelt with my hands (saves drenching towels)
probably about 10 minutes if I’m not paying to heat the water.

Any thoughts you lot.

Nope

ejaculation

+ 1 minute to spray the wall wash away the evidence……surely you dont just leave it sliding down the tiles