Due to the unprecedented number of people paying to embrace the filth this year we’ve had to redesign the start. Now everybody has to do a 600m long gravel climb before hitting the tarmac (first lap only), which should give us about 1000m before the first constriction.
To make it easier riders will be asked to position themselves with the quickest at the front. To make it easier these helpful signs will be erected.
Which one are you?
everyone's Elite for the first 100m 
Will Drac be in attentance for the "will probably die" fraternaty.
We have paramedics.
goes for will probably die for the sense of overtaking folk
I was 11th at the last one....but I suspect I won't be this time.Can I be 'used to be fast(ish)'.
I was 10th last time ... thanks Rorschach 
I bet there will be hundreds of 'Elite' riders and a few more honest souls
Harry. I think you've missed one:
Will almost certainly die - please pre-book me an ambliance
Oh... and could I be so bold as to suggest a potential sponsorship opportunity
Does that mean the slow people have to go further? thats no fair!
You've got bigger fish to fry Uncle Jezza. You're on a tandem. The rider at the front will be in a different class to the rider on't back
It could get confusing 
I'll be bottom right..
Fot abour 2hrs I reckon.
Singlespeeds need their own sign naturally. Something quite large to make sure everyone knows how 'rad to the power of sick' they are.
Thats where I'll be that is
I'll be bottom right..For abour 2hrs I reckon.
If you beg a marshal will finish you off with a shovel.
If you beg a marshal will finish you off with a shovel.
I'll have a chat with Tony... 
If I'm riding - still not certain yet - I'm going straight for the same category as Teeto.
And then into the unspoken "vomit" category. Before then moving into "lie down" territory.
The unspoken "vomit" category? I reckon the top of MTFU hill will look like the 3am pavement outside an Essex 'Nite Spot' after a lap or two 
If it's anything like the 3 Peaks, 99% of the entrants will stand around the "Elite" one trying to look good, cause havoc during the first 600m dash, then shout at each other while getting in everyone elses way.
I'll be right next to the "Elite" sign, obviously, with my pointiest elbows and well rehearsed list of excuses
I shall bring my own sign and plant it in a suitable place
We've gone all Big Time Charlie corporate now.
MTFU Hill = The Buff® Bluff
The Chin = The Endura Free Fall
Water splash = Mt Zoom Rapids
Ton's bit = The Hope Thick Ear Corner (if we can find something to hang a banner off near by)
If Brant brings a banner we will stick it on Preparation H (so named because if you get it wrong the impact with your seat will ruin your ass).
after a lap or two
Awww! s'not fair. Mtb gods have 5 signs to choose from. Us mortals only have the one 
If it's anything like the 3 Peaks,
So will we have our normal chat on the road while avoiding all the confused people? I do remember your words of:
'Hope you're UCI points help today' *evil grin*
I hate you Dave 
In other news.
The man with the cannon has cancelled so we will have to find an alternative way to start the race. Flag, air horn, trumpet, Ozzy Osborne style mock dwarf hanging... not sure which.
I've consulted Popular culture and it says we can still incorporate the cannon idea, while finding a use for Hora
This is him doing his routine earlier this year
You know the battle scenes in Lord of The Rings, well that just with more mud and uglier participants.
NO cannon? I shall bring my own expolsives
So will we have our normal chat on the road while avoiding all the confused people?
Yup, occasionally shouting "CAR!" while stareing into the eyes of a terrified pensioner who only came out for a quiet drive in the countryside but is now in daner of being drowned under a sea of overly enthusiastic lycra...
The man with the cannon has cancelled so we will have to find an alternative way to start the race
Go to the back of the pack...and start a rumour
<so wishing I wasn't to be holed up in a photo studio that day>
Don't get me wrong, i'll be having fun but HTN, with my camera, putting faces to pen-names...
We have paramedics.
Not enough I fear...
Chris (marsdenman); are you going to be there? I owe you a beer old bean!
Shirley - you've missed out 'I'm only here for the beer and abuse' sign.
Urgh. Laminating signs is destroying my mind. 100 down. 100 to go.
Can I have a "woefully unprepared, unfit and slower than everyone else by a substantial margin" category?
Is there going to be a sign for
No intention of racing
but having a laugh
at those that
choose to race.
Some pictures from last years event.
https://picasaweb.google.com/115867557921985666080/HITTHENORTHMANCHESTER#
I wonder if the guy who did thos will be back?
https://picasaweb.google.com/115867557921985666080/HITTHENORTHMANCHESTER#5572896470837489202
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