Genuine names of people I’ve personally met, or witnessed:

Everelda Dick

Godpower Moses

Dick Gotthardt

Fred Asparagus

Yolanda Squatpump

I rejoice in knowing these people actually walk the Earth. (walked, in Fred’s case, RIP)

Benedict Cumberbatch

Mike Hunt
I also go for a beer with a Mike Strange

Once met a guy called Neil Doon.
He worked for a firm called Poole Dick Associates.

Also once met a guy who worked for Dunnes Stores in Dublin and his name was Paddy Fields.

Went to school with a bloke called Matt White. Think his dad might have been a painter and decorator.

I once got introduced to a guy named Kevin Wardrobe in a meeting, I asked how to spell his last name. He just said “no you heard right it’s Wardrobe”

Genuine names of people I’ve personally met, or witnessed:

Where on earth do you hang out? 😯

Can’t remember his first name but my wife used to work with a guy who’s surname is Batman.

Was expecting to see Minty Badger and Scary Looker* on the end of slimjims list.

*horrible histories reference.

Emma Royds

Randy Clinger

I’ve got a good one, but won’t share it on a public forum.
My first name and two middle names rhyme.
My Brothers name also rhymes with mine, and one of his middle names also rhymes..

Other good ones certain Nigerian, Middle east & Asian names.
All good ones are too rude for the forum sadly.

So, pointless post then.

Where on earth do you hang out?

Ha! One I met in London, one a colleague, a couple during call center work years ago, and another in movie credits that I had to Google to believe was true.

Emma Royds

Is this legit? I want to believe it, rules are legit names only!

Obv Wayne Kerr

We also have a Randy somethingorother at our US office which never sounds quite right ‘Hi is RANDY there’ or ‘can I speak to RANDY’ ‘Hiiiiiiiii RANDY’

*cough*

My dad was a school friend of Nimrod

I used to work with a Colette Harris

Say it quick, and drop the H. We all did, as somewhat ironically she was a right ****!

Personally encountered:
-Humphrey Ring-a-Bell
-John Spark (electrician)
-Willie Wyper (preferred to be called “Bill”)

Reliably informed of:
-Ernesto “Che” Guevara Lynch Grubb
-Diesel Rainbow (surname unrecorded)
-Pocahontas (surname unrecorded)
-Sineado Connor (seriously)

Probably apocryphal:
-The story of a health visitor who had to gently explain to a new mother why “Chlamydia” might not be the best name choice for her daughter. Heard this a few times in various work settings.

I bought a car off a man in Houston whose name was Randy Bishop

Had dealings at work with a girl named Sorca Hunt. She was married and I assume she took her husbands surname. Perhaps inadvisable.

My friend’s married name was Carol Service, sadly now divorced.
My Niece had a friend called Iona Gunn!

We have a brother and sister in town one’s called Everard Dick and his sister is Ophelia.

I kid you not.

I onc met a Ben Down.
Mrs PP used to work with a guy for years and it was only when he left and she saw his redundancy letter she realised he was a Mr Mann.

There was an old lady who lived near us when I was a kid and her name was Mary Christmas

Our group scout leader was Dick Short

My brother had a Kimberley Clark in his class

A colleague was Named Giselle Marie Hunter

obviously shortened to Gis-M Hunter by her ladies rugby team, which was a misnomer because she divorced her husband after discovering her sexuality with other members of the team and she has now reverted to her maiden name

Leigh King

Nick Money – who was genuinely a banker

Teacher at my school – Mr Head, fine until parents evening he introduced himself as Richard…

Currently in a facebook event group where a regular poster is called Fanny Eaton

My dad was a school friend of Nimrod

A person where I work is called Nimrod Cubangay

There was a Nimrod and his brother Ariel at my school. The latter regularly got ‘Daz’ or ‘Persil’ as a pisstake.

A mate worked with Fanny Fagot.

Randy Slaughter
Fanny Chua

One of my US colleagues is called Dick Botch.

Another is Randy Bumgardner.

And near me is a Dr Adingadoo.

not owt rude, but I have a customer named David David.

I also was at University with mike Hunt. Used to make football matches great fun – quick!! Mike Hunt’s wide open!

I also used to work with a Senior guy called Randall Lay – Randy for short. One time he was in a meeting at my site and a phone message came in for him. The PA took it and then asked me if she should interrupt the meeting or not, but as we were discussing they broke for coffee and he came out, to which she then delivered the never to be forgotten – “Excuse me, are you Randy?”

And then we also had a lady called Regina Hairie.

This is wonderful!

So many great names, Mary Christmas is just about perfect.

Although it took me a few goes to ‘Say it quick, and drop the H’ , Colette Harris is just genius.

Ophelia Dick – how can you improve on that? I wonder if related to Everelda?

David David
Neville Neville
Tom Tom

P.Nutt and Hazel Nutt were our local veterinary surgeons when I was growing up.

not owt rude, but I have a customer named David David.

I have a colleague called Howard Howard

Anna Keay (“its pronounced Kay NOT key!!!”)
Cliff Walls

not owt rude, but I have a customer named David David.
I have a colleague called Howard Howard

I was at college with Martin Martin

P.Nutt and Hazel Nutt

Brilliant!

If only she’d re-marry with the ex-scottish blimp footballer Alan Brazil and double barrel to Brazil-Nutt.

People i’ve met over the years.

– Randy Rod
– Suki Dhooper (always wanted to call her Super-Duper)
– Clients at work with surname Mumbanger.
– Maxmillan Sebastian Crane-Robinson-Smyth
– Mr and Mrs Khunt
– Timothy Dym, always known as “nice, but..”

oh, and when I was a kid, fella who owned the laundrette was called Sammy Adabanjo.

Mr and Mrs Khunt

My god the school register must have been fabulous, every day!

‘Gordon’
– ‘Yes Sir’
‘Harris’
-‘Yer Sir’
‘Jones’
– ‘Yes Sir’
‘Khunt’
– ‘he’s alright once you get to know him Sir..’