When asked for an opinion about something that’s utter rubbish, starts looking around on the floor, in drawers, etc., and when asked what you’re doing, reply; “looking for the rat’s ass I couldn’t give”
My favourite description for someone who’s completely nuts; “mad as a bag of owls”
One of my favourite ways of telling someone to get lost, courtesy of William Gibson, author; “go lick a dog’s ass ’til it bleeds!”
I’ve used “that stews my plums” today (a phrase i found on here) when a mate posted on fb that the gov cut art council by an “unavoidable” 11million but pays for thatch funeral 10 million. That STEWS MY GODDAMN PLUMS
I always cheer up immensely if an attack is particularly wounding because I think, well, if they attack one personally, it means they have not a single political argument left.
(Inherited from toxicsoks Snr and therefore, must be said in broad Yorkshire accent) ” If wit were sh1t, tha’d be constipated fo’rest of thi’ life”. Has been used in operational management group meetings.
My old man used say “Try this son, that’ll put a chest on yer back!” usually when he was road testing his latest Horseradish sauce or some other Character building experience – in his opinion.
“We are shot from the uterus as if from the mouth of a cannon, which is pointing at a barn door covered in rusty nails and hooks. The important thing however, is what we do with ourselves whilst on that trajectory.” – Chris Hitchens.
