F*cktards that order a coffee and say "can I get a (insert name of food/drink)"

It's "can I HAVE a…" I blame Yank sitcoms.

Crikey! Still going?

"Can I get" seems to be a very unpopular phrase indeed

When I take early retirement, might just get a job in a coffee shop to say "no you ****ing can't get anything until you ask properly and politely"

Might only be a very temporary position I fear, bit of luck I won't require any references

What's the problem with "Can I get?" Is it a new thing? As a Glasgwegian it strikes me as one of several fairly standard and intelligible ways of asking for something. One notch up on the scale of politeness from "Gauny geez a…"

"Prolly".

AAARRRggggggggghhhhhh!!!!

'To be pacific'

…that will be specific then?

On behalf of my missus can I nominate

Toilet System, its actually called a Cistern

Glasto

running (eg XTR)
swap out (just swap will do, thanks)
fry up/off (just fry will do, thanks)
random
surge, spike, etc. See this very interesting article
issue. See this very interesting article
Plebs. 🙄

'Keeping it steezy' Along with most other park related ski phrases.

Ti29er

up to London

ensured? goodness what a minefield..

Yes.. Up to London would actually be gramatically correct for me as I live very much to the South of it..
You were joking about the UP to capital cities though right? That's just some retarded yuppie concept that you overheard in an overpriced cafe bar?

"De-planed", a horrible-sounding replacement for "Disembarked".

A phrase my American colleagues use a lot is "based out of", the sheer illogic of which gets my goat.
No I am not based out of xxx I am based in xxx.

Pikey and Fag. Anybody that uses those words just makes me wanna see them DEAD.

"you know it was literally like… the worst thing"

well was it the worst thing ever or like?

Bit late on this thread, my fave hates;
"I ain't never done nuffink"
"At the end of the day"
Really twists my sh*t.

Are you sure it doesn't grip your s**t?

No it twists mine, can't usually grip it, too loose.
So lets just "draw a line under it and move on shall we?"

Sounds like a plan…..

Oooh, another one – on public transport: "customer" (as in passenger)
"literally" is one that does get me, mainly because people use it incorrectly.
"I was literally just about to die" – well, much as I wish it were the case, you probably weren't.

simonfbarnes – Member

and ogling everything in a skirt

this is somehow wrong ??? You prefer those in trousers ?

well, not wrong, but come on, we're made to feel that it's unacceptable in civilised society! Especially when the other half works about 3m away from my desk… She's fortunately moved to Canada now, but is still known by most women here.

Modacom totaly greats my egistance

Pikey and Fag. Anybody that uses those words just makes me wanna see them DEAD.

You probably don't want to come down South then. Lots of pikeys down here, and they all smoke fags.

Off of.

AAARGH!

Mark Datz lives!!!

Had problims @ skool so culdnt use intanet but ok agane

conversate! As in ' let's conversate that with the public'

"skool"?

FFS! skule 😡

Woteva dood

I'm with duntmatter on swap-out – what does this mean? It's those damn language muddling Yanks again.

another would be

absolutely – don't you just mean yes?

People who say 'haitch' for the letter aitch. Plebs on sky sports use it but the beeb have not yet sucumbed

Oooh, good call langy

Why thankyou. This is something i have needed to air for some time now.

How about the American's use of the word momentarily – which they appear to use to mean "in a moment". "Bob will be here momentarily". Oh good, because Bob is a useless **** and I couldn't bear the thought of him being here for any longer.

"Talking to" is another US favourite that seems to highlight a distinct lack of vocabulary or understanding.

And, we want to talk about business speak, how about a splendid "Go Do". Bad enough when it was confined to the US but having seen it pop up in the First Great Western magazine a little while ago (as well as hearing it in other presentations) it looks as if it may be making a bid to become part of our culture. Ugh!

one word:
DISCHARGE

OMG! From reading this thread I have realised that my actual spoken language as apposed to my written word is just a loosely strung together collection of affectations, chavspeak, americanisms, business BS, textspeak and poor grammar..

I'm like.. literally fully stoked at the thought of sharing some serious downtime with some of you guys moving forward and that… innit.. word

"Engerland! Engerland!Engerland!Engerland!Engerland!Engerland! Enger – – – – land!!!!!!"

– all those monkeys that shout out about being English during world // euro cup etc etc – and how much they hate the Germans when most of them are German themselves. So funny but somewhat annoying at the same time and the hatred is incredibly ironic.

DISCHARGE – Great band though.

to *ize a word(and derivatives). A common crime of Americans

Which just goes to show you have little grasp of (British) English. Might I refer you to one of those large collections of paper and print, otherwise known as a dictionary? You will find Fowler's of some use here as well.

I fail to see how Americans, whose distinct language styles developed from the English at the time the nation itself was being founded in its modern form (where "ize" was the standard ending to many words), have committed any crime.

The "ise" variant in (British) English became increasingly popular in the 20th Century, though "ize" remains perfectly acceptable and is the preference of the OED.

The only failing, as far as I can tell, has been the unquestioning reliance by the British on word processing programs, the spellcheckers of which assume that British English prefers "ise", rather than knowledge or independent thought.

So, to add to the list of grating words, can we also add the grating sound of a limited and prejudiced intellect railing blindly against something of which it is apprently entirely ignorant?

Stoked – a ghastly word in many ways but is there a synonym for it?

How can you describe the feeling without using the word "stoked"

So, to add to the list of grating words, can we also add the grating sound of a limited and prejudiced intellect railing blindly against something of which it is apprently entirely ignorant?

Egzackly I culdnt of sed it betar miself

"can I have a taste of that" when used in the "gis us sum of your food" context.