The only time I ever get asked what I do is when I get stopped by the police (there will be random stops of vans travelling back from the Highlands then theres been a tip off that drugs might have come ashore somewhere)
So every now and then I get pulled over on some remote backroad for a bit of polite small talk and one of the questions will be ‘whats your occupation’. The trouble is I don’t really know – or I do but its difficult to summarise. But when an officer of the law asks it feels like the answer matters. On the last occasion:
“well officer I’m sort of an artist but I don’t make art very often so usually I work in film and tv but thats not what I’m doing today’
“what are you doing today?’
‘Long story.’
‘OK…… do you mind if we have a look in back’
‘Be my guest’
Opens van door to reveal a severed head and a burnt corpse.
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My accountant quite enjoys going through all my receipts and trying to figure out what I get up to “you bought £2k worth of wildflower seeds, and £28k worth of high explosives in the same week – were they for the same job?” “Yes”