What do you do?

Been wondering about this for a while, now that there’s a thread moaning about asking others what their job is, it seems an ideal time to ask.

STW seemingly has an expert on everything and any question asked usually gets an answer from someone who works in that specific field, however obscure.

So! Post your job here, the more unusual/interesting/exciting/etc the better. Let’s try and keep it genuine, no rocket surgeons 😉

I’ll start, setting a high bar:
Computer programmer (.NET & Angular mostly), with a sideline in e-commerce. Fascinating, I know.

Official advice from my government employer is to not reveal my occupation on social media. 🤷‍♂️

Sometimes i ask myself the same question

Official advice from my government employer is to not reveal my occupation on social media.

same in the mrs’ last job. It was not quite as exciting as you might think though, given that 🤣

I have been a cheese inventor. I have been a mouse wrangler. I once worked with radiation and chemicals and exotic, dangerous stuff. I now sit in front of a computer for most of the day.

Consultant/Design Engineer – Electrical building services (all the electrical guff that makes buildings work lol)

Take people on holiday.

I work for a building society that is, in many ways, nationwide.

IT, specifically Open Banking, FTW

I used to be a pusher of a pen and a shuffler of paper, but now I mainly just move a mouse around a pad and push a button occasionally.

Materials engineer at a car company. Used to make jewellery and bits for jet engines.

(Not the real HR) :/

Apparently you don’t have to grow up. You can spend your life playing with felt tips 😀

I deliver/collect blood, stem cells and hospital samples.

Exotic chancer.

Lab manager for a gas production platform with a heavy focus on environmental sampling and compliance.

I’m also a GasSafe heating engineer/plumber when the fancy takes me.

IT consultant*, not that that narrows it down much. I think everyone imagines a different think when they hear this.

* part time, don’t tell my employers…

I work for a building society that is, in many ways, nationwide.

IT, specifically Open Banking, FTW

I have been on your site, I may have even met you.

I’m a Project Manager for an Engineering/Manufacturing Multinational.
The bit I work for designs and builds cooling systems and refrigeration plant for Naval Ships and Submarines.
70% of the role involves playing with Spreadsheets/project plans/dull documentation – whereas the other 30% involves getting involved with building/testing – this is a the bit i enjoy the most, and the reason i’m not really interested in a promotion.

This thread demonstrates the opening point of the other thread. Most people have incredibly boring jobs!

I repair broken things in a plasterboard manufacturing plant.

Ex pawnbroker, insurance analyst and neuro rehab coach.

I used to be a part time Lowell George impersonator, but my hair fell out.

I have been on your site, I may have even met you.

I believe you were there at the time of The Great Coconut Water Giveaway.

Do you work for the, er big blue, consultancy? I’ve worked with a lot of them.

This thread demonstrates the opening point of the other thread. Most people have incredibly boring jobs!

As a fella once said to me when I were a young whippersnapper complaining about something I’d been asked to do – nearly all jobs are boring, if they were fun they wouldn’t have to pay you.

I drive a neenaa, look after people who drive neenaas, watch on a screen where neenas are, help people needing a neenaa get one quicker and occasional tell people they don’t need a neenaa and to use their car.

My official job title is ‘Reader’.

Also in Open Banking 😳 Thinking of starting a mountain biking forum for IT people in open banking now.

Microbiology lab technician – NHS. Spent this morning prepping toe nails, will spend this afternoon identifying fungi.

Currently full time house elf who gets out for walks and rides once he’s fulfilled his duties.

Until recently Outdoor Access Officer, previously Primary Teacher, previous to that Public Rights of Way Officer.

Play with chainsaws and dig holes in the woods

I develop new medicines for lots of nasty diseases (including COVID). In my spare time I also advise on COVID to some people you will have heard of. I also provide expert witness to athletes accused of doping (some of whom you may have heard of – one rides a bike and another is off to Wembley later this month).

nearly all jobs are boring

This is true (sometimes). I’ve read about five summaries of must-have-exciting new drug opportunities today. They all start to look the same after a while!

My company welcomes identification on Social Media: disclaimer, all opinions are my own not those of GlaxoSmithKline.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Howard_(wrestler)

When I’m not pretending to be a wrestler, I do sales support for a corporate window cleaning and building maintenance company.

Official advice from my government employer is to not reveal my occupation on social media.

Used to have that (before the internet) as we were working on MoD stuff and the site could become an IRA target if anyone knew what we really did.

I now design Telecoms networks or rather I design and write SW which does it for me (and others) and now mainly support the tools I developed which made my primary role redundant….

For those who care mainly VBA and bash. The VBA bit is a classic example of scope creep where a few 20 line macros written 15 years ago have morphed into a 200k+ line monster from my id which won’t die…..

Originally trained as a mechanic, then college/uni for Electronic/Mechanical engineering degree, worked at gates power transmissions for a while, rode my bike for a few years then worked as a chocolatier for 10 years, don’t work anymore due to spms so I guess i’m a professional Internet forum bum living on benefits.

This thread demonstrates the opening point of the other thread. Most people have incredibly boring jobs!

Boring jobs? None could be as exciting, enthralling and captivating as my job in Strategic Network Design for Sewers.  I am a hit at dinner parties.

I encourage people to jump off cliffs.

Like Molegrips IT consultant*, but from memory in a very different way (it’s meaningless really).

Specifically I advise on Cyber Security, mostly by convincing people to buy our Managed Service. I also consult on hardware, networking kit etc. In a more honest world I’d be called Technical Sales or something, but specifically in the UK people hear the word “sales” and assume “con man”. I’ve got very many industry qualifications for the Security side of things, but I’m so often shouted down by IT hobbyists, I will almost never get involved in IT stuff on here, that and it’s boring.

Formally I was a Relationship Manager, Underwriter and Fraud Prevention person for RBS, again, apart from the fact I’ve not bothered to a keep up to date on it since I left, I have an understanding of UK banking rules and more than a laymen’s understanding of Economics.

Combined I have a better than average understanding of bank security, but it’s not really my field.

My official job title is ‘Reader’.

Lecturer at Oxbridge?

In a more honest world I’d be called Technical Sales or something,

Yep, done a lot of that in various roles – fitting the product to the customer’s need / application on a case by case basis.

My official job title is ‘Reader’.

Lecturer at Oxbridge?

Nah, meters 😉

Recruitment, in financial services and insurance.

Vaguely interesting to a small few, suitably dull for everyone else.

Nah, meters 😉

Very good!

must-have-exciting new drug opportunities today.

I think the most overused, and inaccurately used, word in the work environment is ‘exciting’.

I train lawyers on how to make their computers work.

Operations Manager for a Composite Company.

Mostly making carbon fibre panels/components for premium road cars, motorsport, aerospace and occasionally high end furniture.