A fancy dress costume.

Either
a Batman or Robin outfit
Hospital gear, ie, surgery outfit, and kit.
rik mayall young ones outfit and wig.
or a hot air balloon and basket to fit a medium build person.

Basically it needs to be for a Bristol themed fancy dress party.

And i'm not allowed to go blacked up and in shackles…

Help!

Bristol themed

Dress as a bike thief or crack dealer?

Pirate.
Bananarama.

A few 'yard-broom' heads strapped to your back – Bristle the Hedgehog?
Or, more obvious – nice pair of…..

Long John Silver (lived in Bristol)

in a sari? Indira Gandhi went to 2 schools here.

Long pointy nose and be COncorde?

And even more importantly, who's gonna lend me an outfit as i'm still jobless.

or write Cymru am Byth on your rear tee-shirt, and be Welsh Back.

… or mug the guy that is supposedly Isembard Kingdom Brunel at the SS Gt Britain for his top hat, tails and pinstripes.

Otherwise I can ask Mrs ADH if she can swipe some scrubs in sharki-size for you. I'll try not to get MRSA coated ones for you …

Grow a beard, act like a tw*t and carry a red box – Noel Edmonds and Deal or No Deal.

Or go in a pair of plimsolls with a line across them – apparently invented in Bristol.

ADH, that would be awesome if she can get some scrubs inc face mask and errr hair net for i.

However i'm tempted to go in a surgery gown(backless) and faint an injury, not that i'd need too.

However i'm tempted to go in a surgery gown(backless) and faint an injury, not that i'd need too.

Go as a stab victim, super topical.

Get some string, couple of planks painted black, and some matchbox cars.

Hang planks from arms, glue cars on, and bingo, a photorealistic suspension bridge costume.

Go dressed as a Gorge-ous Avon lady.

Isn't there a costume shop near the Xmas steps.

I hired a roman centaurian outfit and won best dressed at uni.

Also hired a gorilla outfit and sat on the bus wearing the mask.

Chaplins if they are still there?

I can barely afford the price of entry and fuel to get there, which is a bottle of wine and £7 petrol.

But a good night is on the cards and i need one of them badly.

Hoody
Baseball cap
cans of spray paint
hide your face

Banksy! Easy.

one scaffold pole
one hard hat
one tool belt
one thong
one bottle of baby oil

& go as a stripper…………. 😉

it's fancy dress so i can't go in my normal gear….. 🙄

i've narrowed it down to three possibilities.

1 white sheet and chefs hat, the wine glass will be always present.

2 all in black, with yellow stripes and or white lines up the middle, meebie even a one way sticker on the butt.

3 surgery scrubbs.