Jonners and Aggers Test Match Special leg over incident.

Are you mad?

Mad? I was livid!

(Rowan Atkinson in the headmaster sketch – I forget where from)

Gerald the gorilla was definitely wild.

Jonners and Aggers Test Match Special leg over incident.

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KsVTpX7LdZQ[/video]

and in a similar vein Roddy Forsyth has an problem with a pigeon while working for Radio Scotland

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxdETjyjB08[/video]

Matt Bianco (and I think Five Stars) appearance on an early Saturday morning kids show (the one after Noel Edmunds Swap Shop I think).

Caller: “Hi there, is that Matt Bianco”

Matt Bianco (in best giddy pop start voices): “Hi, yes it is!”

Caller: “You’re all a bunch of w*****s”

[video]https://youtu.be/7UKpZxM-c9w[/video]

Wild? I was absolutely livid!

This one:

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beCYGm1vMJ0[/video]

The Rowan Atkinson line is from Gerald the Gorilla sketch on Not the Nine O’Clock News:

Prof. Timothy Fielding: I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Can I put this into some sort of perspective? When I caught Gerald in ’68 he was completely wild.

Gerald, the Gorilla: Wild? I was absolutely livid!

Another one was Pamela Stephenson (as Janet Street Porter) interviewing Billy Connelly https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFWsge0IEF0

[video]https://youtu.be/KAfKFKBlZbM[/video]
This, plus all of Holy Grail.

This is also genius…

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gf_kjwOSjGI[/video]

Vic Reeves’ floating Lloyd Grossman on Masterchef

[video]https://youtu.be/Os82UYqssSc[/video]

The Swedish Chemist from Not The Nine O’clock news never fails to raise a chuckle for me

Its not really something old but its something i return to a lot to make me laugh out loud

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x84GKqcpY4E[/video]

Gerald the gorilla was definitely wild.

Ahh okay then – this is the one I mean. Struggling to find out which one came first….

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EgOvNJeefvA[/video]

Headmaster: Well now, Mr. Perkins. It was good of you to come in. I realise that you’re a busy man, but I didn’t think this matter could be discussed over the electric telephone.

Mr Perkins: No. No, absolutely, Headmaster, I mean, if Tommy is in some sort of trouble, then I’d like to nip it in the bud.

Headmaster: Well, quite frankly, Tommy is in trouble. Recently his behaviour has left a great deal to be desired.

Mr Perkins: Dear.

Headmaster: He seems to take no interest in school life whatsoever. He refuses to muck in at the sports field. And it’s weeks since any master has received any written work from him.

Mr Perkins: Oh, dear me.

Headmaster: Quite frankly, Mr Perkins, if he wasn’t dead, I’d have him expelled.

Mr Perkins: I beg your pardon?

Headmaster: Yes, EXPELLED! If I wasn’t making allowances for the fact that your son is dead, he’d be out on his ear!

Mr Perkins: You mean he’s dead?

Headmaster: Yes… He’s lying up there in sick bay now, stiff as a board and bright green, and this is, I fear, typical of his current attitude. You see, the boy has no sense of moderation: one moment he’s flying around like a paper kite, and the next moment he’s completely immovable. And beginning to smell.

Mr Perkins: Well, how did he die?!

Headmaster: Well, is that important?

Mr Perkins: Why, yes, I think so!

Headmaster: Well… Well… Well, it’s all got to do with the library, you see. We’ve had a lot of trouble recently with boys taking out library books without library cards. Your son was caught, and I administered a beating, during which he died. But you’ll be glad to know… You’ll be glad to know that the ringleader was caught, so I don’t think we’ll be having any trouble with library discipline. You see, the library card system…

Mr Perkins: I’m sorry…

Headmaster: …was…

Mr Perkins: You beat my son to death?

Headmaster: Yes, yes, so it would seem. Please, I’m not used to being interrupted. You see, the library card system was introduced…

Mr Perkins: Well, exactly what happened?

Headmaster: Well, apparently, boys were just slipping into the library and taking the books!

Mr Perkins: No, during the beating!

Headmaster: Oh, that? Well…well, one moment he was bending over, the next moment he was lying down, I mean, er…

Mr Perkins: Dead?

Headmaster: Mmm… deadish! … Mr.Perkins, I find this morbid fascination with your son’s death quite disturbing. What I’m talking about is his attitude! And quite frankly, I can see where he gets it from.

Mr Perkins: Well, it wasn’t me that beat my son to death!

Headmaster: Well, that was perfectly obvious to me from the first day he arrived here. I wondered then, as I wonder now, if he might not have turned out a very different boy indeed if you had administrated a few fatal beatings earlier.

Mr Perkins: Are you mad!?

Headmaster: I’m FURIOUS! In order to accommodate the funeral, I had to cancel afternoon school on Wednesday!

Mr Perkins: This is preposterous!

Headmaster: Yes, it is. Or at least, it would be…if it were true.

Mr Perkins: …What?

Headmaster: I’ve been joking, Mr Perkins. Pardon me, it’s my strange academic sense of humour. I’ve been pulling your leg.

Mr Perkins: Oh, thank God!

Headmaster: I wouldn’t cancel afternoon school to bury that little shit!

One of the best Simpsons clips EVER!

The April Fools edition (watch the whole thing):

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0yq37CwFDM[/video]

EDIT: to add the best:

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSCUhqsy4Nk[/video]

Jonners and Aggers Test Match Special leg over incident.

Reminds me of the Liz Hurley one I heard live.
Can’t remember the exact words or had the mic but:

“Oh look there’s Liz Hurley in the members enclosure.”
“Have you come across her before?”
“No, but I’d like to…”

Then silence and you just about hear them sniggering.

[video]https://youtu.be/ejaWq2TXRXE[/video]

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pGH-BeVme0I[/video]

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkpS-yBj7gY[/video]

Yes Minister — Why Britain Joined the European Union

Farting still gives me the giggles.

Probably my oldest brother seeming to take genuine offence at being stared at by a sheep around 20 years ago while we were climbing at Burbage. It still seems as silly as it did when it happened.

🙂

Superb. Was bored at work today – won’t be tmrow.

Farting

Loads of great ones above that have me laughing.

Early Red Dwarf has to be another contender and I often think Holly got more of the prize lines

“I’m Holly the ship’s computer with an IQ of 6000, the same IQ as 6000 PE teachers”

[video]https://youtu.be/4XWPo9j8O4I[/video]

Rimmer: Step up to red alert.
Kryten: Sir, are you absolutely sure? It does mean changing the bulb.
Rimmer: There’s always some excuse, isn’t there?

TV – Father Ted, Black Books, Angry Boys, Flight of the Concords and Look Around You.
Internet – emails from an areshole, the American news anchor reading out the made up names of that Chinese flight crew and the Eddie Izzard Lego Deathstar Canteen posted on page one.
Books – timewaster letters and universally challenged.
Film – Weekend at Bernie’s, The Big Lebowski and most of John Candy’s output.
Music – Concords and Arrogant Worms

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNLC-b8zWEk[/video]

This still makes me laugh

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMPJZ4YZnqI[/video]

And to follow a theme. A school football match at primary school that for some reason Mrs Evans was refereeing despite having no notion of the laws or conventions of the game. A goal was scored, the ball was returned to the centre spot and the other team kicked off without waiting for her signal. ‘Stop! Stop! Come back. I haven’t blown off yet!’

22 eleven year olds have never laughed so much

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5EmCKbWS6c[/video]

Microsoft Windows 🙂

Derek and Clive
South Park

Miranda, any episode..

I know it’s really clichéd, but how ever many times I watch it, I can’t help laughing at Del Boy falling through the bar hatch.

I know it’s really clichéd, but how ever many times I watch it, I can’t help laughing at Del Boy falling through the bar hatch

or trigger and his broom and his continual use of Dave when addressing Rodney.

This still makes me spill tea and spit biscuits:

[video]https://youtu.be/Fs786SYC_iQ[/video]

[video]https://youtu.be/iXczSof201U[/video]

Porridge. I dozed off laughing, watching it last night.. 🙂

paton – Member 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkpS-yBj7gY
Yes Minister — Why Britain Joined the European Union

Yes Minister had many funny things to say about Europe (and quite accurate)

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvYuoWyk8iU[/video]

The Simpsons’ finest moment.

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WZLJpMOxS4[/video]

Chortle?
What, with these feet?

[video]https://youtu.be/ZXIbV4TWTFM[/video]