- Things I should do before the girlfriend comes home
So, the girlfriend has been working away mid week in London for the last 8 months. She’s due to start working from home again from the 30th.
Any essential (pretend) batchelor activities I need to get in. My imagination is proving rather poor.
So far I have
Food binging. (Deep fried pizza inbound)
Excessive alcohol consumption (within reason, I’m a lightweight)
Weeing in the garden
And yes I know, this doesn’t paint me in a good light but hey ho.
Not acceptable activities are those that involve genuine relationship betrayals. Eg hookers.Posted 4 years agobinnersSubscriber
I was going to say farting. Lots of farting. But theres just no pleasure to be derived, even from the biggest, window-rattling rasper, unless there’s someone there to look appalled by your obvious enjoyment.
So… first morning when she’s back… the Dutch Oven!
Its good to share 😀Posted 4 years agojambalayaSubscriber
Whatever you do when she’s away (bike maint in kitchen with photo evidence is a good one, mates round for beer, curry and poker evening etc) when she gets back book a dinner midweek somewhere nice, buy her some flowers and tell her it’s to celebrate the fact you can now enjoy being together all week. The boys will be boys stuff is all good fun but the welcome home will serve you in good stead for the future.Posted 4 years agothisisnotaspoonMember
Dunno, my missus has been away for 4 days, appart from just about everything mentioned above, I’ve managed to re-decorate the hallway how I wanted it!
So if I don’t post anything tomorow I want Jamie to animate my demise in the form of an amusing .gif and mail it to the police.Posted 4 years agotheotherjonvSubscriber
Don’t wear her underwear, that’s sordid.
Do – rearrange her underwear drawer. When I say rearrange, I mean hide all her day to day granny pants, and ensure that only the scraps of lace and a bit of string ones are left. She’ll get the message. For extra points* add a few more quality items in there in place of the granny pants.
* When I say extra, I mean extra compared to ‘no points’Posted 4 years ago
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