The Stupid Injuries Thread…

Getting out of the bath on Saturday…

I was hauling myself out and pretty much upright when my left hand slipped and I came crashing down on the edge of the bath chest first – ending in a heap on the floor!

It smarted at the time, but my god the pain has ramped up over the last few days (gradually easing now, but still bloody painful). Good job I’ve got access to some of my mum’s codeine or I’d not be sleeping at night! 🙂

I’m only 55 – I’m not ready to be browsing walk-in bath catalogues!

(I know there was a silly injuries thread but can’t find it).

I was walking to the pub and I was hit in the shoulder by a brick , then another hit me on the back of my head.
As I stumbled around disoriented another brick came out of nowhere and smashed into my family jewels.
Never got to the pub

One of my wife’s mummy pals had asked me if I could go out with her lad who was trying to get into mountain biking.

Messing about in the carpark before heading out. Slipped a pedal and put a 4 inch gouge in my shin.  Blood everywhere.  She’s not asked me to take her lad out again.

Packing the car for a camping trip this year – first major trip in years with a brand new ‘cotton tent’. Shove something in the boot, then realise my thumb has hit something sharp. Deep cut, blood pumping out. Nay bother, go in for a plaster and carry on packing.

Get to site some hours later, start to unpack brand new tent, thumb opens up and starts to pour blood again. In steps MrsF as she’s now got to put the tent up !

A lad who worked for me a few years back was cleaning his teeth and as he went to spit he sneezed.  this made him headbutt the top of the tap which broke his nose. That made him reel backwards where he tripped over the towel on the floor, falling back into the shower where he managed to fracture his wrist & skull!

I thought his Mrs was making it up when she rang in ‘sick’ for him from the hospital but it turned out she wasn’t.

Was known as Lucky from the day he returned to work.

Packing the van a couple of weeks ago to go for a ride, slipped slightly when putting the bike in and hit my head hard enough to split it open, fair bit of blood and a decent lump meant I didn’t go on the ride!

I was walking to the pub and I was hit in the shoulder by a brick , then another hit me on the back of my head.
As I stumbled around disoriented another brick came out of nowhere and smashed into my family jewels.
Never got to the pub

at least you can take solace in knowing that you are a now an international superstar.

I was trying to take family photos over my shoulder in Thetford Forest, but went off the side of the trail and pile-driver’d my handlebar into the ground with my torso. I had a spectacular multicoloured bruise for weeks.

Emptied a box of fine sawdust onto a fire outside the workshop.

Result, large fireball roasting the hand nearest to the fire.

Not me (for once) but a friend sharpened a knife and then ran his thumb along the blade to see how sharp it was. It was sharp.