The most work message ever

I know I trot this one out whenever we talk about this stuff, but this is an actual email I got at work and is, in it’s own way, brilliant.

Firstly, we have signed a transformational outsourcing deal with xxxx which will deliver an increase to our cost synergies from the £112m per annum in 2013, which we will still hit on time, to £143m per annum by 2015. This deal de-risks the embedded value, contractualises the delivery of the cost synergies, and it de-risks the execution of our plans, allowing us to focus on the other opportunities we have as a business.

@ratherbeintobago this is my son. Was supposed to start last Wednesday. Looking like he starts tomorrow now, Tuesday, almost a week late, but still no it access.

we will still hit on time

I’m finding it hard to not misread this.

Good to see that General Melchett’s School of Leadership has more alumni than all the nations universities put together.

I worked at a large tech firm that sounds a bit like sauce…

An email went out to the entire GAL, 150k users, in error. There was then a multi day storm of ‘please take me off this circulation list’ etc – CC all. And on it went. After day 4, the MD stepped in with a very firm STOP! NOW!

@IHN was that a company now with no vowels?

FFS Jen’s the IT help desk chatbot.

I regularly got emails telling me someone I never knew had started, was having a leaving do.

Eventually I joined them having a leaving do.

It’s threads like these that I wish I didn’t post under my real name.

@IHN was that a company now with no vowels?

You mean the one named after a Scottish city? Nope.

However, let’s have a little quiz

1) Name the massively successful sitcom that had characters called Joey Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, Monica and Chandler

2) Name the Des’ree  single of the 90s, where she famously professed to preferring eating toast to seeing ghosts.

The sales manager coming round to ensure everyone says well done, on WhatsApp, to the sales team… for basically doing their job.

Lots of people in including HR off on holiday this week because schools are back.

Which obviously means lots of new staff. All that paperwork is not sitting on empty desks. (Well it’s not because most of them are still working from home so add that in as another delay).

2,500 Reply To All saying “Hi”

We had a woman that sent a notification to the whole company telling us she was going on holiday. Triggered a couple of days e-mail arseholery until the IT team put a stop to it because the e-mail system was at risk of failure.  ?

Emojis still not working! Blimey.

We had a woman that sent a notification to the whole company telling us she was going on holiday. Triggered a couple of days e-mail arseholery until the IT team put a stop to it because the e-mail system was at risk of failure.  ?

We had something similar – emails getting backed up in the system so no-one was sure if the email they’d sent had been read and not actioned or if they were supposed to have received an email themselves…

So everyone started adding Delivery Receipt and Read Reciept notifications.

Unsurprisingly, this did not assist the backlog of emails problem; in fact it made it exponentially worse as every email sent then generated at least one further email automatically.

IT emailed us all asking us to please stop this practice. An email that 80% of people didn’t get for about 3 days.

Ron Pickering’s sister, Jen.

I’m stunned that you think any of Ronnie (do you know who I am) Pickering’s family are in gainful employment.

I have no doubt they get emails from DWP but I would bet it isn’t employee related

We had the email thing.

Last thing in the afternoon before a long weekend. Someone in corporate comms forgot to tick a box regarding OOO/autoreplies and in between sending the mail and the first of the OOO/autoreplies getting back to the senders inbox, switched their own OOO on. Which then responded to all the incoming mail.

Not 100% clear on all the details, but there was something like 10 million emails in the system within a couple of hours and a million being added every 15-20 minutes, then the system stopped. Took two or three days for IT to finish zapping everything.

AFAIK there were changes made to autoreply and OOO by microsoft (this was in the mid 90’s, not recently).

I’m genuinely astounded at the number of organisations who don’t have “send to all” as a highly restricted privilege.

AFAIK there were changes made to autoreply and OOO by microsoft (this was in the mid 90’s, not recently).

Yeah, sounds about right. I’ve seen this happen (and had to recover from it) back in NT4 days. I think the default behaviour was changed circa Exchange 2003, so that you only ever send OOO once per sender.