Out for a spin last night, along the canal to get things started, passing under a bridge with 6 scratty youths on. 2 of them took it upon themselves to try and spit on me, but their aim was shit & I was too fast. Internal rage wolverine beserker style had me going back and kicking some manners into the little shits. My sarcastic side would have shouted ‘missed me fatty’ so perhaps his mates might have mocked him later. Instead I did nothing and carried on my way. Arggghh.

Was it Justin Bieber?

Beginning of the year we passed about 6 lads on the canal who shouted “don’t forget to duck!x then about 1/2mile further on ran into the string they had tied from a lock gate across the towpathto a tree, luckily it wasn’t that resilient and it snapped when I rode through it, fishing line etc would have been a different story

truly a no win situation…

you do nothing and you feel emasculated 🙁
you batter them and, well, you’ve just attacked some children 🙁

Pick up dog crap in a bag, throw it at said yoofs.

Throw them off said bridge into the canal, then spit on them as they flounder in the water.
Putting your foot on their head as they flail in the water is optional.

well, you’ve just attacked some children

3 13/14yr old youfs threw half a house brick at me as I passed a pelican crossing on a main road – when I vaulted the railings to give chase – 2 disappeared towards an estate that I wouldn’t enter but 1 headed for the bushes
next day I decided to report it in case it had been a regular problem,
surprisingly got a call back asking me to come into give a statement
so then i had a visions of them showing me CCTV from nearby nursery and medical clinic – not scripted but the performance was a bit like this:

angry old man in lycra pacing pavement shouts and gestures ” come out of those f…ing bushes NOW, I’m still here and I’m still waiting to stuff your testicles up you f…ing a…hole” (repeat until decide probably has legged it but not before his mates come back dumbly shouting his name)

Police suggested one person who matched the name and known to them but description didn’t fit by a mile
Also asked me to confirm if brick hit me or my rucsac – I confirmed rucsac -apparently that would make assault hard to stick! Did say that if brick had come from rubble pile or skip they could arrange to get shifted which vaguely impressed me

Always a bit of an easy target when you are on a towpath.I had kids throwing old fruit at me once (leftovers from a market)so not as worrying as house bricks,although some of the apples looked quite hard :-).
A cyclist coming the other way had warned me,so when I arrived at the kill zone I waited till they threw(and missed)then I sprinted under the next bridge,picked up some of the old fruit,ran up the stairs and launched the counter attack. 🙂
God knows what I must have looked like 😉

TBH I was always more scared of meeting the older yoofs/dealers under one of the bridges with their Rottweilers,ting ting 😯

I’ve had this happen to me before, whilst on a canal path from a bridge with a fairly quick traffic route passing over and a couple of scrotey teenagers.
I was miserable and full of cold.
Did I take a long loop back and give them both barrels of a 20mph snot rocket? Well, I can neither confirm nor deny 😉

job done! 😀