Witchcraft.

That’s only because cling film hasn’t been around for hundreds of years… welcome to the future of egg poaching…

You’re being sold a consumerist dream.
Somewhere, a clingfilm manufacturer is cackling with delight at your blind acceptance.

Break free of your clear, stretchy mental chains.
Throw off the clingly, hard to tear yolk (sic) of petrochemical imperialism and let your eggs breath freely.

Not sure how well you can breathe in boiling water….

Good point. It does tend to #### over a lobster.

Clobber – Member

Not sure how well you can breathe in boiling water….

😀

Strawman argument – reported to the mods.

You’re the kind of pervert who uses an electric can opener aren’t you?

chicken poo

Chicken? How very common.

Duck eggs FTW

I love poached eggs,but I am a bit crap at making them. 🙁
I don’t keep chickens,so my eggs are not fresh. 🙁
I only ever get more mess when I try the,adding vinegar method 🙁
I don’t like the look of those egg holders 😐
I don’t like the idea of cling film ( don’t know why that is) 😐

All of this makes me 😥

and now I am hungry.

half fill a cup with water, crack one or two eggs in it, and stick it in the microwave for a minute.
Looks horrible, tastes great.

My LBS* sells goose eggs, might have to poach a couple to see how they turn out.

*Local Butcher Shop

best fried eggs I ever had was quail, about 7 yolks in 1 white

JESUS CHRIST!
IT’S RADIO 4 ON A SUNDAY MORNING.

made me laugh out loud 😀

Clingfilm is bloody witchcraft. Vile, hateful, horrible stuff that will always without fail wrap itself around itself in a nasty little blob of hatred. If you can ever find the end. And then it’ll tear. It’s the evil black heart of hell at the centre of the world’s darkness. Along with celery.

The only sensible “clingfilm method” is to throw the satanic blasted box of it straight in the bin.

And breathe. I hate clingfilm with a passion.

Electric Can Opener!!!

Now that is fighting talk!

I imagine your bedtime reading is the “Caveman Guide to Lighting Fires” (In order to boil water (In order to poach an egg (crappily)))

deep pan with lid (not aluminium) lots of boiling water , add small amount of viniger(malt) turn off heat swirl with spoon crack egg into vortex as close to water and center as possible cover with lid and leave off heat for 5 mins or a shade under but no more.

Agreed the best … I break egg into a cup and then slide it gently into the water, a little vinegar helps and water boiled but then off/very low heat.

Clobber – Member

Electric Can Opener!!!

Now that is fighting talk!

I imagine your bedtime reading is the “Caveman Guide to Lighting Fires” (In order to boil water (In order to poach an egg (crappily)))

Can you get that on Kindle?

Anyway, you imagine wrong:

I LIKE technology – the good stuff like suspension forks & disc brakes, stuff that makes your life easier and more fun.
Not stuff like tubeless & dropper posts – useless shite sold to fools that can’t even poach a bloody egg. 😀

I use an egg poaching pan

Me too, its a grand tool, no faffing, crack and go. And I can cook 4 in the time it takes others to cook one, pah, who wants 1 egg at a time? I want 4 doses of protein, right now, all in one mouthful, beefcake, BEEFCAKE!

Try it… you know want to…

Me too, its a grand tool, no faffing, crack and go. And I can cook 4 in the time it takes others to cook one, pah, who wants 1 egg at a time? I want 4 doses of protein, right now, all in one mouthful, beefcake, BEEFCAKE!

It takes 2.5 minutes to poach an egg, and I can do 4 at a time in a large pan of water. Using a fancy pan means you’re making a barstewardised egg en cocotte, not poached.

And to all you vinegarists: stop it.

This thread needs pics to establish the true winner, surely.

As owners of pretty bicycles you know image is the most important factor in just about anything…

Its not hard…

ive perfected it over the years.

makes no difference if eggs come from the fridge imo.

anyway… small saucepan only about 6″ diameter,

boil kettle, stick water in pan just as it about to boil crack two eggs in and switch off gas/electric, leave for 3-5 minutes.

job done

Why take the raw egg out of a perfectly serviceable outer layer only to then wrap it in clingfilm? That’s just a boiled egg.

Poached eggs are vile however you cook them. Can’t believe I’m the first person on this thread to point this out.

Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it scotroutes…

onewheelgood is a mentalist troll and I claim my £5.

heh. recognition at last.

No need for any voodoo or pissing about. Crack eggs gently into an inch or two of simmering water (salted with a splash of vinegar if you like). No need to spin the water and you can do several in one pan no bother. Stick them on toast with loads of marmite, mmmmmm………

Having fresh eggs makes it work much better though.

It takes 2.5 minutes to poach an egg, and I can do 4 at a time in a large pan of water. Using a fancy pan means you’re making a barstewardised egg en cocotte, not poached.

Why take the raw egg out of a perfectly serviceable outer layer only to then wrap it in clingfilm? That’s just a boiled egg.

+1

And to all you vinegarists: stop it.

-1

I only use a splash of something light like cider vinegar – makes no difference to the taste and does seem to help a little with binding the egg together. You don’t need it with nice fresh eggs though.

Boil…BOIL?!

Fill a saucepan with approximately 15-20cm of water then add 2tsp salt. Place a plate upside down in the bottom of the pan then place the pan over a medium heat and bring the water up to 80ºC.

One at a time, crack each egg into a ramekin dish and pour it into a slotted spoon with small holes. Allow to drain any residual white for approximately 1–2 minutes.

Lower the slotted spoon into the warm water and slide the spoon out. Allow to poach for 4 minutes.

Remove with the slotted spoon and place on kitchen paper to drain the excess water. Season with salt and freshly ground black pepper.

Cheers,
Heston

Heston is making something more complicated than it needs to be. Draining the egg is only necessary if it isn’t very fresh.

As for heating to around 80C, that’s quite difficult to achieve without a water bath.

I do like his tip for boiled eggs though – putting the egg in cold water and bringing to the boil makes the shell less likely to crack.

Rusty Shackleford – Member
Boil…BOIL?!

…snippety snip…

Heston

It’s just a poached egg!!!

I like mine stacked in pairs on toast.

Upper one is done in a frying pan, no water, a little oil.
Lower one is done in a saucepan, using beans instead of egg.

Try it!

klumpy – Member
I like mine stacked in pairs on toast.

Upper one is done in a frying pan, no water, a little oil.
Lower one is done in a saucepan, using beans instead of egg.

Try it!

instead of egg?

I like the look of Heston’s egg – looks like it’ll sit nicely on a slice of homemade bread. I’m gonna give it a try tomorrow and see how it turns-out…

instead of egg?

You mean you poach your eggs in beans..?
That. Is. Genius.

Heston only does it like that because he’s got a KP to wash up after him…

Eggs poached in beans…. Genius.

hmmmm…… Tinned tomatoes…. Alphabetti spaghetti…

Three pages on eggs!

Only in STW 😀

And that is just poached.

Still to come :

Someone saying real men only eat black pudding fried in lard
Someone pleading with everyone who poaches eggs to wear a full-face helmet and goggles
Someone who got dog poo on their poached egg
Someone who bought a poached egg in the classifed section but it never arrived
Someone claiming the CIA use poached eggs to spread mind-control chemicals
Someone posting an amusing picture of a kitten with a poached egg
Someone reminiscing about the old days, when you could get proper poached eggs
Someone quoting ten paragraphs from Sheldon Brown that has nothing whatsoever to do with poached eggs

And to finish it off, two big hitters endlessly arguing that poached eggs are the fault of Thatcher/The Unions

QUALITY !!!

what tyres for poached eggs ?