The “Clunk” of that rock hitting the one part of the frame you forgot to protect.

‘Get off me you fat bastid’

Me, blowing out my Arris…

Any.  Bikes have to run silently for me

My singlespeed was making screeching noises which quickly progressed to klonking as the bottom bracket failed on Wednesday night. Accompanied by the occasional little tinkle as bearing balls fell out.

That was none too pleasant. 😢

The taping of a cable casing which isn’t fixed down right.

Llamas.
Dicks 😡

A dry creak. One that sounds like nails running down a chalkboard, and takes weeks to find…

The disc rubbing AGAIN.
pffft…pffft…pffft…pffft…pffft…pffft…pffft…pffft…pffft…

Press fit BB creaking yet again on my Diverge

Spoke going TWAAAANGG!!!

SSsssssss….thwap thwap thwap

The harp like plucking when a rear mech cage catches the spokes…

That occasional awful sound from the freehub that sounds like the cassette has slipped a notch. (I know it’s not that but it’s quite a dramatic noise!)

I took my earphones off for a sec when Zwifting the other day. Seems music has been successful drowning out the horrors of my slack maintenance! All the noises in one frightful cacophony.

The sound of air escaping quicky from the latest pinch flat

the phftt phftt phftt phftt phftt phftt phftt sound of the “tubekkake” party

I’ve always quite liked the bubbling noise the rotors and pads make when you’re braking

The clicks/knocks ect of a ruined drivetrain, drove me mad the other night need to give the hardtail some love.

Whistling rotors.

The whine when the flux capacitor fails to kick in.

The dreaded click/creak/snappy noise of another **** up CSU under heavy front braking.

That one ^

Sod all you can do about it and bloody expensive!

Dry chain. 2.75hrs of a 3hr ride today reminding me I hadn’t lubed it.

A dry creak. One that sounds like nails running down a chalkboard, and takes weeks to find…

That one especially. My seatpost/saddle currently doing this to me so I’ve narrowed it down. Entirely wrecked last night’s excursion. Not even a mouse-squeak but a loudish crack-crack-crack. In fact am just about to tackle it, trying lithium grease on the post and some GT85 into the saddle-guts. Sitting pedalling on it sounds like it’s about to snap, which is (I hope) far less likely than it sounds, even allowing for post-seasonal loading (currently rated ‘biffer’)

Any noise on a bike (other than swishing of tyres and smooth ‘tk-chk’ of a gear change) drives me insane. I also have Hope hubs and not from a sense of masochism, they just came with the bike. May have to sell/swap 😬

That chain coming off sound just before your knee hits the top tube

the hollow wooden sound as the bike hits you over the head in a tumble… i think its from the bike…

All the noises other than those of a nice well maintained bike and the terrain you’re going over annoy me.

Although the worst is no noise at all, when you’re expecting some of the above. This invariably means I’m on the floor in a heap, having come a cropper somehow 😂

The clicks/knocks ect of a ruined drivetrain

This…

The disc rubbing AGAIN.

…and this.

Also the clunk clunk clunk of either a ruined headset or, yep, broken wheel bearings.

Currently have a noisy right cleat on my spd pedals. Sounds like walking through a quiet office in new cheap work shoes – creeeeeak skart creeeeeak skart SQUEEK creeeeeak skart 😒

Worst noise I heard from any of my bikes was the snapping of my chainstay.

The thunk of a carbon rim hitting the trail when bottom out the tyre.

The creak/snap of a bottom bracket starting to fail.

The clicks/knocks ect of a ruined drivetrain

@halifaxpete, @squirrelking – Explain this to me, please?

If you’ve ever had a chain that’s stretched beyond all decency it makes a lot of clicking and crunching noises, occasionally clunking as it skips over the equally ruined cassette (usually punctuated by a smashed kneecap on your shifter).

My shoes rubbing against the front wheel gently reminding me I bought the wrong size bike 😭

Worst noise I heard from any of my bikes was the snapping of my chainstay.

You’re lucky to have heard it in time! 😉 Mine gave no discernible sound on impact. All of the sounds came from me 🤣

Click, click

click

click,click

clickity click click

clickity click click, click click click .

AGGGGGHHHHH WHERE IS THAT COMING FROM 😡

Headset, not enough preload on the headset. no

Eventualy I found the frickin dropper was a bit loose in the tube and gave it an extra little tweek.

Ahh Bilsss 😀

Click

Grrrrrrr

Lack of maintenance leading to chain slipping on a cassette is pretty wince inducing.

Also sidewall of heavily worn rim popping off and simultaneous ‘bang’ from resultant puncture. Down a hill. In traffic. Luckily the rear but a touch nervy.

My commuter bike deserves more love..

Mavic Crossmax freehub death howl

I used to have a near-constant whining noise from somewhere behind me.

I don’t go out riding with her any more.