Maudintrackworld – who do you miss?

I am staying away all week with work in Grimsby. I used to be away from home a lot but not so much recently and the isolation is making me a bit introspective. I have been thinking about people I have admired over the years and for some reason Sean Hughes is the guy who has occupied my mind.

He was about five years older than me and died relatively young at the age on 51. I related to his love of bands like Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds and his support for a crap football team. In his case Crystal Palace, although he would be pleased with their recent progress.

I once sent one of his poems to a girl I was keen on on Valentines Day. It got me nowhwere which I think he would have enjoyed.

How I feel

You are more than a ray of sunshine.

I, a leafless tree, you an evergreen,.

I tramp off the beaten path

in your forest.

You are the glimpse of the moon I seek

a shiny refelection on the water’s skin.

you walk hand in hand with the stars.

I can pretend all I like.

The most romantic thing I can say to you is,

you’re the one I want to have problems with.

Thanks for indulging me in this if you have read so far.

Who do you miss?

My partner, Joey. More than it’s possible to express. Grief has no time frame.

My great mate Dougie.  Mum and my Uncle Joe.  Miss having them all to talk to.

MY partner Julie who died 3 years ago. I will never be the same man again.  The grief is overwhelming at times

Very maudlin

My gramps, who died when I was one so I never knew him, but in an odd way I do miss never having known him. Everybody who knew him says how lovely and kind he was, sort of bloke that’d do anything for anyone; a bit of an outlier in the family if it’s true!

He was an engine driver in the days of steam and would surely have had some amazing stories to tell.

Today of all days I feel this, 11th September 2001 casts a long shadow.

Bungle

Dave

Smit-dog

George

Spen

Pies

Some of the finest humans I’ve had the privilege to know and call friends.

Then there’s the countless ramp ceremonies for the lads and occasionally lasses I never knew that I attended.

All the veterans that ran out of fight and died by suicide.

Every one a brother or sister related through purpose not blood.

I have a long and complicated relationship with loss.

Big hugs to all of you.

The man I used to be, before the three separate cancer diagnosis, the five major operations, the radiotherapy, the lifelong drug treatment, leaving behind a body that is well f***** before its time.

Most definitely don’t want this to sound self pitying as there are lots of you out there that have endured worse than me but I’m having a really bad day today.

Nothing wrong with that dude. You’ve had a battle most of us can’t even comprehend. Sometimes we need to vent about the impact so go ahead.

My dad, died this week. But it’s been coming a long time, as he’s gradually slipped further from who he used to be. So I guess I miss what he was, before the last few years, when I didn’t really appreciate it.

And a really good friend died yesterday by euthanasia. He was in Canada, larger than life bear of a Saffer. Could cook well, did pottery, built furniture, made stuff just because he had random pieces. Saw him in March, but before that not since COVID; he had cancer and it took him away, but I just remember the big guy as he was, and I miss that more than anything.

The man I used to be, before the three separate cancer diagnosis, the five major operations, the radiotherapy, the lifelong drug treatment, leaving behind a body that is well f***** before its time.

Jesus, that sounds like a rough time. And, given the way the brain works, I can see that being tougher to get a handle on than missing someone else, you know? Sending hugs/ manly beers

The Strathpuffer is a funny race in so many ways but I’m unlucky enough to have had some kind of friend or relation die in the two weeks before it on four occasions. These are, with the exception of grandparents, the only people in my life who have died and because of its proximity to the race, and the fact that I’ve used the race as an opportunity to raise money in one of their memories means that this lot weigh heavy on my mind and I miss them. Three of them were even STW members.

My pal Kirsty, who thought the Puffer was stupid, who died just after her thirtieth birthday the night before the race in 2023.

My uncle Gary, who died suddenly of a brain haemorrhage in his garden at the age of 70 a week before the race in 2023.

A few people on here will remember Tree Magnet, who went due to cancer and BJ, BJ was killed on the bike by a drug driver a week or two before the 2018 (I think) edition.

Then, the one I miss the most, my pal Chris who was killed in an avalanche in Glencoe at the age of only 24 a week before the 2013 Puffer. We’d been through uni and raced bikes against and with each other. We were the greatest of friends. We raised over £30k in his memory at various Puffers for Glencoe Mountain Rescue but I’d rather have him back. Losing a friend at that age hits you hard.