Is asking someone out on a date over the phone a no-no? Its someone I know quite well (ex neighbour), rather than being an acquaintance. I know its better in person but I'm struggling with being chronicly shy and never seem to find the right time to ask her out on a date when we're just hanging out 🙁 Asking her out on the phone might be a little easier! I guess if I really thought she'd say yes it wouldn't be a problem, but I think she'll say no and I'd be gutted, frankly!

Yours soppily,
Kit

MTFU 🙂 Feint heart never won fair lady, best face to face I would say.

best face to face I would say

I know, just wondering to safe the embarrassment.

Do it however makes you feel most at ease – if the feeling is mutual she won't be put off by you using the wrong technique.

That comes later 😉

Go for it! If you feel more comfotable that way, then I don't see the problem.

Phone's fine. I originally asked my wife out by phone (though admittedly I wouldn't have really seen here elsewhere to actually ask her in person).

I would say phone is okay too, if that's what means you're most comfortable to begin with then go for it! I wouldn't be p**d off! I got asked out by text message once, didn't offend, didn't go (but that's because I wasn't single!).

Phone is fine. Text and email is also acceptable.

However you do it, just DO IT! You'll regret it if someone else gets there first.

I simply can't believe that no one has done this yet;

or has she "got a really nice personality"?

The worst that can happen is she says no. So what? She'll most likely take it as a compliment at least (unless you're a complete wierdo).

"got a really nice personality"?

Remember the personal ads codebook:
– bubbly/ a whole lot of fun/ well-rounded (large)
– can handle responsibility (got kids)
– looking for the right man (desperate)
😉

Kit would like to be a wierdo but he's too nice 🙂

or has she "got a really nice personality"?

She's got a couple of nice 'personalities' nudgenudgewinkwinknowhatImean? But seriously folks. She's bloody gorgeous, and I'm not a wierdo (thanks Simon!) so fingers crossed, eh? 😀

Well if she's an ex-neighbour you presumably have already spoken to her (or at least seen her) face-to-face….

Give her a bell, even just to leave her your number just in case she ever fancies a drink sometime and a catch-up. Sure that'll be 'code' enough for a subtle woman to realise she was been asked out for a date!

Well, have you rung her yet then? Update required!

Do it by whatever means you feel comforable with. If she's as lovely as you say, it's worth the risk. She can only say no – nothing worse. I remember being rejected by someone I really fancied – but I still felt "brave" about having tried! Go for it, you've nowt to loose!

She's got a couple of nice 'personalities' nudgenudgewinkwinknowhatImean?

Pictures, gaddammit, pictures!

just make it casual and off the cuff.
dont go "hi, will you go out with me?"

I reckon you should stick with the times and create a facebook invite… she'll think your cool and hip and definitely fall for you…

I definitely didn't propose to my wife over facebook!

defiantly 😉

Over the phone is fine! It makes it much less awkward and you can make it sound nice and casual.

However, make sure you prepare yourself if you get the answering machine… 😉

When are you ringing her?

I think she has has her pole dancing class tonight, so will call tomorrow 😉

I think she has has her pole dancing class tonight, so will call tomorrow

Okay, I'm a girl and even I want to see pictures now!

just knock round out the blue after work & ask her…

XC-Steve – that's cool, but your wife's response is just brilliant!

Kit – go for it!

Okay, I'm a girl and even I want to see pictures now!

Interesting… I've done some internet stalking and found a photo of her online. Not telling you lot where though 😀

Ring her up, it's fine by phone.
Just casually say, hey it would be great to catch up, how about a drink. Make sure though you make a definite date.

Good luck.

best piece of advice I ever got was off a scary barnsley lass, who told me of her friend "She'll never sleep with you if sit there looking miserable, so dance like a loon, at least then someone will sleep with you. or punch you."

nice place barnsley, but she had a point, doing nothing gets nothing done, put your balls on the line and ask her face to face (its harder for her to turn down). If she says no, say "fair do's, wanna go for a pint and gossip about the best way to ask you out?"

timc – Member
just knock round out the blue after work & ask her…

Back door?

😈

I'd say be direct and honest, tell her you'd like to take her out for dinner or somesuch and make it clear you like her, phone is fine. Don't add any caveats either confidence is attractive in people.

Something like I've been wanting to ask for ages if you'd like to go out for a drink or dinner sometime.

Simple and to the point!

Well I asked, and got turned down (in the nicest possible way, natch).

Ah well…

move on mate and don't dwell on it!

I have been turned down once or twice but didn't take it personally!

Oh that's bad news Kit. But you tried and that's the important thing. Stay upbeat and positive and don't take it to heart.

ya, chin up and all that.. at least you asked her.

I was really shy myself ( now I'm married so it doesnt matter *L* ) and I know how much it takes to work up to ask someone out.

Nah, I won't, don't worry 🙂 Thanks for all your help!

Good work fella now ask 5 more and one of them will say yes.

It's not great getting a blank but not the end of the world either and at least you had the nuts to do it!

funnily enough it's as bad saying no as well to someone cos you dont want to hurt their feelings, I have said no lots of times – well made excuse's!

At least you know now. I hate wishing that I'd done something or asked someone, even if it went wrong – at least I knew. Takes all the 'if only' scenarios out of your head.

Nice.

Good work fella, shame about the result, but don't take it too hard. Yesterday morning whilst hunting around looking for the room I was supposed to be getting some training in, I happened upon a lass I'd worked with with about 2 years ago, we got on well at the time but I'd been her boss then so never let things get beyond the professional. But in a moment of rashness (it helps that my shame gland is under developed), I decided to have a bit of a 'chat' as I don't run into her that often nowadays, turns out she has just started seeing a chap last week so it was no to a drink, but 'it's very new' and she asked for my number. So you never know, there is never no shame in asking 😉