Every time I walk into a shop that sells magazines/newspapers I'm bombarded with headlines about the latest PR-created, non-development in the life of effin' Jordan/Katie Price. It's not as if she's done anything of note and she's the sort of woman I'd go out of my way to avoid.
I feel most violated by the magazines positioned just above the conveyer at the checkout in Sainsburys.
I don't care about her travails, but every time I'm reminded she exists I have a little moment of regret that I will probably never be photographed snogging her. I wish I was a cage fighter. 🙁
Everyone preferred Peter anyway, she realises it and is compensating.
I tend to agree with that – she briefly came across as pleasant when she was with him, but in reality she is just a media-whore of epic proportions whereas he seems to have a certain dignity which she cannot deal with.
A Whole New World
I sit here at my computer trying to type with tears & sweat pouring down my face. The highly anticipated, critically acclaimed 'A Whole New World' by the selfless, media-shy couple, Katie & Peter had arrived earlier this morning. As a hard bitten, cynical private detective with a bitter outlook on life, I wasnt too excited. I had heard about other so-called 'legendary albums' which never made me cry or touched my cold heart, so I didnt expect it to change my hard bitten & cynical demeanour.
As I placed the CD into my player & the first notes bloomed out of the speakers, & slapped me like…. well like some kind of big slapping machine. The title track had just kicked in! The beautiful strings knocked me over like a ton of bricks, & the dulcet tones of Peter harmonizing with the magnificent lung powered voice of Katie pinned me down. I just couldnt move from the ecstacy that was rushing around my body. I could only just see in my reflection that I was smiling widely, almost unnaturally, my eyes were wide open & my ears were bright red from the quality of the heavenly music entering them. But my favourite track was easily the funky & much improved 'Just the Two of Us'. I was never aware that Mr Andre could rap. And so well! Move over Busta Rhymes, MC A'dre is kicking it up old school! My entire body quivered the most violently on this song with pleasure.
Disapointingly the album came to an end & I could move again. I pulled myself to my feet & I realised that my hard bitten, cynical demeanour had disapeared along with my bitter outlook! My ears were bright purple now from the astonishing music that had just ambushed it for the past 30 mins. In fact Im getting them amputated next week, but I dont care. Normally I would be bitter & drink myself silly in a downtown bar, but after hearing that INCREDIBLE album I instead decided to write this review, & apply for a job saving seals & rescuing puppies. Thank you Katie & Peter, you saved me from a life of bitterness & anger. You rocked my 'Whole World'.
She may well be a media whore, an unpleasant person and not too hot in the maternal stakes, but come on, admit it, you'd have a go on them given half a chance.
She may well be a media whore, an unpleasant person and not too hot in the maternal stakes, but come on, admit it, you'd have a go on them given half a chance.
Admit it? Okay, I admit I really wouldn't touch her. Not because she isn't pretty (which she can be given the right make up and lighting), but BECAUSE she is an unpleasant person.
And those false boobies – they do absolutely nothing for me whatsoever.
She may well be a media whore, an unpleasant person and not too hot in the maternal stakes, but come on, admit it, you'd have a go on them given half a chance.
I'd just like to apologise about my earlier post saying I wouldnt mind a go on Jordans bosoms. She is of course much more than a pair of surgically enhanced breasts.
Has anybody seen the 'stolen' home video where Dane Bowers sticks his big toe up her flue? Sheer class..
more pr**ks than a second hand pin cushion, and someone on this forum stated they also want a go…
get a grip of yourself man.. its probably more satisfying…
Oh and don't even get me started with her talking about being raped in public then refusing to talk to police but wants the world to know! What a good role model she is!!
Posted 14 years ago
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