heres one for you all – would you stay with a partner if they cheated on you?

  • This topic has 110 replies, 51 voices, and was last updated 10 years ago by  hora.
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  • heres one for you all – would you stay with a partner if they cheated on you?
  • Premier Icon BigDummy
    Subscriber

    are ther any Women here?

    πŸ˜‰

    very good, i though that would pop up but not that quick, i doth my cap to you Sir.

    IanMunro
    Member

    Hora, what if you saw bingo with another dog?

    hora
    Member

    Hey true but unless you are IN that actual situation, how would you act? I could only say hand on heart that I'd chase down the subject to its conclusion and that includes the other party. Only then could I start to move on.

    From a guy-perspective, for a guy to stray it can be 'dunno, it was just sex'. For a girl to stray though its not always 'just sex'. It can be more complex cant it? Girls just dont have a one night stand as they fancy a 'shag'.

    I'm not a violent person so you cant assume I'd go 'after' the bloke to give him a kicking. It would be part of the healing process for me to want to rail at him and ask him 'WHY'? In addition I might go after the bloke and he might give me the kicking, I'd still need to go after him though to find out questions and the glimmer of answers.

    hora
    Member

    Hora, what if you saw bingo with another dog?

    Or……looking happier being stroked by another person? 😯

    Mister P
    Member

    If she cheats on you then you need to take a good percentage of the blame IMHO. Going after the other bloke is you not being able to face that.

    hora
    Member

    "Girls just dont have a one night stand as they fancy a 'shag'"

    LOL, yes they do.

    I was generalising. I mean if they were in a long relationship- the reasons would have to be more complex surely?

    ourkidsam
    Member

    'WHY'

    He either fancies or wanted to shag your partner I expect. Really you need to be asking her why.

    Premier Icon BigDummy
    Subscriber

    For a girl to stray though its not always 'just sex'.

    I don't think it's "just sex" for men, frankly. Isn't it to do with having someone else bolster your self-esteem by giving you something to dream about which isn't dependant on the same fat-assed dullard who's been dragging you down for years? πŸ™‚

    bigsi
    Member

    No way would i be able to forgive. I've been there and couldn't/wouldn't put myself in that situation again.

    IMO if a relationship means that little to your partner and they are prepaired to do something like that they are not worthy of being with me, I deserve more than that. Its a betrail of trust as far as I'm concerned 😐

    Hadge
    Member

    The problem with this scenario is we all "think and believe" we all are perfect in keeping relationships – and boys and grils we aren't. Marriages, relationships break up for all manner of reasons not just flings and sometimes no matter how hard someone works at it, it still doesn't work. My ex had an issue with her age, all the women in her family died before they were 60, an hereditary illness. She felt she had things to do before she popped her clogs so she had an affair and left our kids! And no, I would never have her back. But that said I've not been squeaky clean and so it's the case of those without sin and the stone throwing crap. Before you make a quick judgement on your partner, please be honest with yourself and see how you have been and behaved etc. I truly believe there are very very few people who haven't done something they wouldn't like their partner do, even it was a drunken kiss/grope etc etc. Love the Life Of Brian picture – absolute classic πŸ˜€

    Girls just dont have a one night stand as they fancy a 'shag'.

    do we know this for a fact ? I think actually women are just as prone (haha) to this as men

    Rockplough
    Member

    If she cheats on you then you need to take a good percentage of the blame IMHO.

    Sorry but this mentality is bollocks imo. Relationship problems need communication. If she dealt with it by shagging someone else then I'd cut her out of my life like a tumour.

    Junkyard
    Member

    NO mark no woman alive can seperate her emotions form sex …it is one of the main reasons that we dont have aporn indusrtry or prostitution anymore. How is 1970 by the way? Will you take your medallion off before the fight or choke him with it during it?

    And yes mark clearly all men can have sex without emotion… I feel so embarressed now apparently I have been letting the side down all my life.

    hora
    Member

    Mister P – Member

    If she cheats on you then you need to take a good percentage of the blame IMHO. Going after the other bloke is you not being able to face that.

    In some cases, yes you might be to blame in part (violence to partner, emotionally cold etc etc) however if someone cheats then they are looking (possibly) for something that you couldnt have given them anyway. You need to find out as much detail* as possible as a simple 'forgive' wouldnt work either.

    *Pics and vids not included you dioty-STW lot πŸ™„

    Premier Icon binners
    Subscriber

    Hora's forever trying to shag me. He just won't accept the fact that I'm well out of his league

    Coyote
    Member

    Good points of view all round. I can appreciate Hora's "wounded animal" approach to the problem and I couldn't say 100% that I wouldn't feel that way too. However, much as it shocks me, I find myself agreeing with Mr. Barnes again on the concept of forgiveness. But surely if you love someone so much that you could forgive them it's only fair to expect them to love you enough not to stray.

    Premier Icon BigDummy
    Subscriber

    they are looking (possibly) for something that you couldnt have given them anyway. You need to find out as much detail as possible

    So this is a form of learning from experience, rather than mere honour killing?

    You'd hunt this guy down, and then whine "what were you giving her that I couldn't? Help me be better so that I deserve her love" πŸ˜•

    Premier Icon cinnamon_girl
    Subscriber

    STW adopting the morale high ground shocker πŸ˜‰

    Premier Icon BigDummy
    Subscriber

    There's a girl! Quick, catch it and ask it to tell us its secrets! πŸ˜€

    Junkyard
    Member

    Go BD top form today Sir πŸ˜†

    hora
    Member

    Lets not get away from the fact – Its the ultimate betrayal.

    Another bloke sticks himself into every conceivable hole of your once fair-missus. Rides her like there was no tomorrow and makes her scream his name from the tops of the trees to the ground that shakes from the movement of the bed.

    To those that say they would talk it through and forgive. Tripe.

    ourkidsam
    Member

    Mark, again your putting the focus on this other guy and not your knicker-dropping, philandering, reverse-cowgirling girlfriend

    Chuckle at BD's last few posts!

    I'm now happily married and hopefully won't have to face any of this ever again (!) touch wood.

    Back in the day though, I've been on both ends of the cheating stick. A girl I was absolutely infatuated with went travelling, came back and told me straight out that she'd had a one night stand. I got over it, forgave her and eventually she asked me to marry her. I didn't, but that was down to me not being ready – the marriage would've meant moving abroad too…

    I've also been a cheating toe-rag (in another life!) and wouldn't have expected any sympathy had I been caught – I eventually was BTW and got all I deserved.

    If my wife did the dirty, I think I'd find it very, very hard to forgive and forget….

    Premier Icon cinnamon_girl
    Subscriber

    OK guys, here goes. Men have been known to be unable to keep it zipped up, women likewise 😯 Men don't have the monopoly on sex (awaits ribald comments).

    There's loads of reasons why this could happen, we are not perfect, we all have egos and sometimes it can just happen. Moment of madness anyone?

    You need to know WHY it has happened, you need to communicate cos most of the time people don't.

    hora
    Member

    Mark, again your putting the focus on this other guy and not your knicker-dropping, philandering, reverse-cowgirling girlfriend

    True. The only thing you could do is leave/end it asap. You might be able to retrue a wheel but you can't fix one with a cracked rim. 8)

    There is always the fear that it actually turns you on….you ask her to film it next time and you become one of those wierd "peeping out of the wardrobe door'types that you never knew you were before until it happens… 😯

    But surely if you love someone so much that you could forgive them it's only fair to expect them to love you enough not to stray.

    love need not be symmetrical or contingent. If I were to be relatively unconcerned about infidelity then straying wouldn't be out of the question so long as my partner was sure it wouldn't affect our relationship.

    alpin
    Member

    i'd leave her. i'd expect that she'd leave me if i done it to her.

    both very trusting though. lived apart for a long time and wouldn't see each other for long periods. each have a varied group of friends. she's got a couple of good male friends and i've good female friends.

    not jealous. we respect each other.
    i would kill her though.

    grumm
    Member

    You'd hunt this guy down, and then whine "what were you giving her that I couldn't? Help me be better so that I deserve her love"

    Teehee!

    Premier Icon BigDummy
    Subscriber

    I was wrong though. Hora's purpose in hunting the guy down is to get him to describe every lick and tickle, every thrust and grind, every bump and wriggle, every howl, all the throbbing, flapping, bouncing, tearing, gaping, begging, squirting, gushing and splattering in excrutiating detail. I'm still not clear why that would be good. πŸ™‚

    cinnamon_girl – Member

    STW adopting the morale high ground shocker

    I'm adopting no 'high-ground' whatsoever!!! How dare you! I resemble that comment!!! πŸ˜‰

    IanMunro
    Member

    It's working for me BD! Don't stop when i'm so close.

    hora
    Member

    LOL at BD. I dont want to type on a forum what I'd do. You never know if the prosecution might use this one day 😯

    Bimbler
    Member

    It's just sex.

    grumm
    Member

    Arghhh my pedantry meter is going into overdrive!!!!

    'morale high ground'
    'resemble that comment'

    Are these supposed to be jokes that I am missing somehow? 😑 😑

    no one strike and your out! i'd expect the same treatment too.

    hora
    Member

    It's just sex.

    I think one day we all hit a certain age where we'll see it as that.
    What IF she turns round and says 'why not, Errol has a 12 inch monster' 😳

    Bunnyhop
    Member

    BigDummy – What ever you had for breakfast/lunch? I want some.

    Bimbler
    Member

    What IF she turns round and says 'why not, Errol has a 12 inch monster'

    Errol's 12 inch monster

    Olly
    Member

    OK guys, here goes. Men have been known to be unable to keep it zipped up, women likewise Men don't have the monopoly on sex (awaits ribald comments).

    tick!!

    There's loads of reasons why this could happen, we are not perfect, we all have egos and sometimes it can just happen. Moment of madness anyone?

    tick πŸ™

    You need to know WHY it has happened, you need to communicate cos most of the time people don't.

    tick.

    i was tempted to put this same thread up last week, and have just had a txt

    "wondering if you have a stw alter ego…."

    ive gone through a few phases in the past year (almost to the day)
    currently hoping your all wrong (other than CG) πŸ™

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