Does anyone have any similar experience?

We have had a rescue jack russel for 7 years and she was nearly 12 years old. We loved and adored this dog. It was our best mate and as we didn’t think we could have any children due to my wife having medical problems, she was also our baby substitute. She was with us and by our side when my wife did get pregnant with identical twins. And she was with us and by our side when our twins died.

We now have a beautiful 5 month old little girl and our dog looked after her. Sat next to her, slept next to her in her cot and watched over her.

But last week our dog started having seizures and collapsing. Like somebody was switching her legs off and her balance for 3 seconds. We took her to the vets as soon as we could and they took bloods etc and said see how if they get worse or better.

They did get worse and more frequent, so she was booked for an MRI scan but not for another week and the vet seemed to think it was a brain mass like a tumour or a kidney/liver failure. He also gave us some anti seizure medication which didn’t do much other than help her sleep for one night.

The seizures got worse and she started yelping in pain when she was having them so we made the decision to have her put to sleep.

It’s one of the hardest things I’ve had to do and I can’t stop crying. I also can’t stop questioning if we should have waited for the mri scan. I keep running over different scenarios in my head and questioning if I’ve done the right thing.

Anyone left it too long and regretted it? Or felt like they have had their dog put down too early?

Sorry for the wall of text but I don’t feel like I have any other outlet but the hive mind of stw

I can totally understand your feelings, but don’t think you really had a choice. You did what you believed to be best for the dog, and that’s really what matters in this instance.

Just remember her with love, and when you’re ready, let a new one into your lives.

Best wishes.

You did the right thing. Your dog was loved to the end. I had to do the same for my cat. I was sad but glad to have done the right thing.

You done the right thing IMHO, however doing the right thing isn’t always easy, nor does it always come free from guilty feeling. It’s unlikely that waiting for the scan would have done any good so you would only have prolonged any suffering. I’m sure the vet would have let you know had they thought it was the wrong decision or time.

Pretty much every time, never had a dog that just died. We always have to make the decision and I always beat myself up for days after, sorry.

Our latest brood have probably got under my skin more than any of the others and I’m absolutely dreading that day

FWIW you definitely did the right thing.

Done it twice, heartbreaking at the time but it’s the best thing you can do for them so as not to prolong their suffering and it was so nice to be there with them and hold them and know they were no longer in pain. Have an 11 and 12 year old now and know that difficult time is approaching.

There comes a point when you would be keeping them alive for your personal needs and not for theirs. It’s the painful part of the contract of having a pet.

From your description of how quickly her seizures were progressing then the chances are high that if she had had the MRI then the vets would have found something serious and not brought her round afterwards.

As Saxonrider says, remember her, she was special to you.

Take care

I’ve only ever seen my mum cry twice in my life. One was at her mums funeral and the other was when my boxer was put to sleep. My dad couldn’t even face coming. I still 9/10 years later question whether I did the right thing and feel guilty. With kids, although as parents you blame yourself, they can understand cause and effect so only an amount of guilt can be shouldered. With animals we are pretty 100% in control and that is a really tough burden. Although you 100% did the right thing you will always question yourself but you need to take comfort in the years of happiness and the fact that you were loved unconditionally and in their eyes could do nothing wrong and that is a blessing that should not be forgotten. Chin up!

Sounds like you did the right thing to me.  A lot of vets are happy to spend money on scans and tests but don’t really have much common sense around what you would actually do given scan results and whether you could actually change anything.  A 12 year old dog that is clearly ill and getting worse was unlikely get a good quality of life.

Always horrible to do though and never gets any easier

Definitely did the right thing, once their quality of life deteriorates to such a degree it’s fair not to let them suffer.

Best wishes 👍

Truth is if I was showing the symptoms your dog was I think I’d want someone to put me down.

Those aren’t “ate a dodgy pie” symptoms that sounds neurological.

You did right by your dog remember the good stuff and also the time she stole your slippers.

I too think you did the right thing. And I think you’ve been really brave. I’ve got a JRT (well, Parsons) so I understand how strong the bond is. But I don’t think it would have been in your dog’s best interests to wait for treatment, which quite possibly wouldn’t have worked, in such circumstances. It’s too early to remember the good times now but that’s what you should do when you can. Sounds like she had a great life with you and you were brave enough to let her go when the time was right.

I haven’t had to make the decision as yet myself but my parents had the family dog put to sleep after she was involved in a RTA when I was travelling in Australia (many years ago). I wouldn’t tell them this but I did, and still do, wonder if they let her go too easily. But it’s just because I miss her even after all these years and I guess it will be the same for you. I’ll stop now as my little dog has just come over for a fuss, she doesn’t understand that it’s just a bit dusty in here.

Pretty much what happened to my last border terrier he was 13 I’d had him since I was a kid. It was tough I felt guilty but couldn’t see him suffer after I spent one night keeping his airway open when he was fitting one after another. The next morning he looked well so we had a walk to the vets where I said goodbye to him.

It is tough but it’s better then them suffering. Sorry for your loss.

I think you did the right thing too.

remember the good times.

You currently hate yourself for doing it and you’re questioning the decision. Two things are certain, you didn’t make the decision lightly, and you didn’t make it for you. So, if it wasn’t for you, it must have been for her. I only hope that when my time is served, someone with my best interests at heart could make that call for me. Unfortunately, we don’t treat humans with the same dignity.

We went through the loss of out furbaby almost two years ago now. We knew he’d not been well for a long while and me was medicated to the eyeballs, but he still enjoyed his sleeps, his food, his walks and his cuddles (even if he had to be lifted up onto the sofa). However, I remember we saw the step change in his health and knew what we had to do.

We still look back and wish we’d done it slightly differently, but the reality is, it had to end and there’s no nice way to do it.

We felt just like you do now, for what felt like ages. Eventually, we had to admit to ourselves that we’re doggy people, the thing was, we just didn’t have a dog.

We started helping out at a rescue centre and one thing lead to another. A year later, there’s another furbaby in our lives.

It’s horrible to have to go through it but eventually, you’ll see the balance of good memories vs that day shift to the positive.

I think I’d sooner lose a relative than another dog.

We had a 14 year old black lab, Henry and he got thinner and thinner and then he just collapsed one night so it was a no brainier to put him to sleep, I am. 16 stone woodcutter and i was crying like a baby but as with your dog, he’d had an excellent life and it was his time, we now have 2 more labs and sooner or later we’ll have to go through it again but I wouldn’t be without them

Horrible decision to have to make.  You clearly were looking after your dogs best interests, and sounds like you did the right thing.  Impossible to see into the future, but she may well of only had a few days left, and you saved her a few days of pain.  I’m sure she would have thanked you for that.

My last 4 dogs put down at 19, 18, 17 and 17. The cats at 16 and 18.

Land every time I felt it was too early. But every time I know it was the right thing to do.

https://photos.app.goo.gl/v8gfUhsLQXk41Xgk9

Not sure that link will work.

Thank you for all of your kind words, just thought I’d feel a lot better if I’d done the right thing. I just feel empty

She looks a real sweetie. And very happy running in the fields. That’s the way to remember her, hold onto that.

You’re not going to feel better, you’ve just said goodbye to the most loyal friend you’ll ever have.

It’s just going to take time. You’re not going to forget her, but a time will come when remembering her isn’t painful anymore.

You did the right thing, prioritising her needs above your own heartache.

It is the sign of a good pet owner, it hurts like hell to say goodbye.

Hopefully soon you can remember the good times and feel at peace about easing her suffering.

When it was time for ours to go, we called the vet to the house to put him to sleep .

He hated the vets with a passion , and was always like a different dog when we took him in there.

she set up in the lounge, we both gave him a cuddle , then he walked over to his favourite blanket next to the vet , and just led down next to her, no fuss, no growling and then she did what she had to do.

shit , still makes me cry when I think about it ( 11 years ago)

I can’t take away your feelings of guilt.  I would feel the same in your position and like you – found letting my best friend go, very hard indeed.

What I can tell you, is that your feelings whlist understandable are also not deserved.  Clearly you did all you could and took the only option to free your friend from pain.  She trusted you to look after her and you fulfilled the trust.

Imagine her life.  Loved devotedly by you all for many years.  Loved all of you with devotion in return.  Saw you go from sadness to delight.  What a wonderful thing.

You did well by her.  Time will reduce the intensity of your grief, but for now it’s hard.  One day you will think of her and smile – but it will take a litte while.

Thinking of you and yours…

I can completely empathise. Last February my 19 year old cat started having similar seizures overnight. By the time I got her to a vet she was virtually immobile. I feared what was coming, but I knew she’d have no quality of life the way she was. So, she went for the big sleep whilst I comforted her.

It’s very hard to start with. I felt like taking time off work, but I didn’t think they’d appreciate it. So I went for a little weep in the toilet a few times. You’ve just got to think of all the good times and remember that you gave your dog a brilliant life.

I’ve been through this a good few times and what i’ve learned is “better a week early than a day late”

I’m sure you did the right thing, it always feels shit

What Sweepy said.

I was a couple of days too late with one of our cats. I feel more guilty about that.

Really sad to hear your story, and I can definitely sympathise. It would always be possible to hold on longer but I think in the end you just know when is the right time. We held on to a struggling, but I hope fairly happy 6 year old cat for a few days when we thought there was hope, but we both knew when the time had come-no doubt at all. It sounds like you were in the same boat. So don’t regret, and trust me that the good memories come sooner than you would think.

Rescue dog that you gave 7 years of care and love…….Remember the pleasure and honour I am sure it would have been to be allowed to do that.

Done it 3 times and it was the most difficult decision but the most appropriate each time. I left the first one too long and that was the a mistake I didn’t make for the next two.

Sounds like you did the right thing, as above remember the good times and the great life you gave him.

This is Max:

We had to put him down at only 2 years old in February this year due to behavioural issues. We had him from the pound at 6 months and whilst he was a bit cray cray he instantly fell in love with him. We enrolled him in puppy school the week we got him and he was ace, he learnt heaps of commands- sit, lie down, get off the sofa, don’t eat the cat (that took a while), go and fetch my shoes we’re going for a walk! But he started to develop strange behaviour with people, first barking at a mate wearing a fluro vest, then he went off people who looked “different” (hats/walking sticks/big people). We basically couldn’t have him off lead anywhere, and even when we were walking on lead if we came around the corner there was a person he’d go mental at them.

We completed level 2 of obedience training and started on agilitiy, we had lots of sessions with 2 different dog trainers, took him to the vets who referred use to a behavioural vet at the university. He was put on prozac (first 1/2 tablet a day, then 1 tablet, then 1 1/2) and it did nothing for him other than making him super dopey but still aggressive. We had various runs ins with people, including our neighbour who startled him as we got him out of the the car one day and he basically pinned her against her front door.

That was the final straw. We spent so much time, money and love on that dog and physically he was fit as a fiddle but he was a danger to other people and his quality of life was suffering. One of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do and the bloody bugger wouldn’t even go to to sleep at the end no matter how much drug laced wafer thin ham we fed him! We’d be like ok, we’re there now he’s sleeping we can give him the heart stopping drug but nope he’d jump back up wanting more ham!!

Breaks my heart writing this but I’ve not had a single regret since that day. It was the right thing to do, it hurts like hell but given what we went through I’d have no qualms whatsoever about putting a physically suffering animal to sleep now.

Please dont use the euphemism putting to sleep. Its not sleeping, you had your dog euthanised.

Having said that I’m a dog owner and have had to do the same with two dogs. Dogs are very stoic and will soldier on with all sorts of ailments but it sounds from your description you gave your dog every chance but she had had enough and you’ve done the best thing for her and given her a better end than a lot of humans will be afforded. So feel sad and miss her and take satisfaction you gave her a good life but don’t beat yourself up about it

Given that I’m already struggling with this situation, I’d feel more comfortable using put to sleep than euthanised. I am aware what I have done and that she’s not asleep.

Read this last night before dozing off, dog on my feet. Def no guilt needed, you did what was right. Always had family dogs, but was away somehow (hols, away at uni) when the end came so never faced this. Now life is settled and we are in our forever home, have a fantastic dog, the bond is so strong. Caught myself thinking she’s prob a quarter through her life already the other day, really stopped me in my tracks. Comes with the deal. When the time is right sounds like you have a great home for another rescue. Take care.

They don’t live long and you did what you had to, feel sad for sure but not guilty. This sums it all up beautifully http://theoatmeal.com/comics/dog_paradox

The hardest decision we ever have to make and ultimately one of the kindest. Doesn’t make it easier,remembering the good times, hell  even the startled expression on smelling his own farts, helps.

Definitely the right thing. Often people keep their pets alive when they are suffering, purely because they think of their own feelings. You thought about what the dog must be going through and made the right choice.

We had to do the same wth our cat, he was 20 years old. Had an incredible innings. It was really hard, as I booked the vet in to come round, and I was in the garden digging the hole where we will bury him as he was chilling next to me. Horrible. Ultimately the right thing to do as he was in pain.

Uponthedowns, it is up to the OP what he calls it. If it makes the whole process easier to manage, why are we to judge the term he uses?! Ultimately he has made an incredibly hard decision and feels upset by the whole thing.

Hope you are thinking of those good times OP.

Uponthedowns, it is up to the OP what he calls it. If it makes the whole process easier to manage, why are we to judge the term he uses?! Ultimately he has made an incredibly hard decision and feels upset by the whole thing.

Agreed. Just ignore the comment.

Thanks for everybody’s support and comments. It means a hell of a lot to me.

Just trying to remember all the good times and adventures we had but finding it difficult to be in the house and I don’t want to come home.

I wouldn’t rule out a rescue dog in the future but I need to let the dust settle and the tears dry first I think. And I’m not sure how a rescue centre would feel about a 6 month old baby in the house too

Sorry for your loss OP, what a lovely story about your dog. Don’t beat yourself up, you did the right thing by her.

We lost our Felix over 3 years ago and it still hurts but at the time we were in complete bits and these guys helped us both and I cant recommend them enough. We now donate to them every year.

https://www.bluecross.org.uk/pet-bereavement-and-pet-loss

Take care and good luck.