We made the decision this morning to have our beloved cat, Tigger, put to sleep, She was going on 20 and profoundly deaf with hyperthyroidism and an odd heart rhythm and spent Monday & Monday night at the vets on drips following an extreme bout of vomiting; during the bout of vomiting (several days) she suffered some sort of sudden onset blindness.

I spent Tuesday led on the bed with Her and last night nursing her in bed. Both my Wife and I struggled with the idea of her being both blind and deaf (the idea terrifies me); She was afraid to jump of our bed (were she spent 80% of Her life) and tended to crawl slowly (with the occasional tumble) down the stairs. I followed Her down the stairs last night and she found Her water bowl, but I had to recover her from under the kitchen table and chairs when she was unable to find Her way back. Although the vet said that she may adapt we were very afraid of how she’d manage alone at home (unable to see or hear) whilst we were at work.

Anyway, rightly or wrongly, we had Her put to sleep this morning after a lot of discussion. I ended up crying out in tears during the procedure as they inserted the cannula, forcing a halt in proceedings, but then we decided to continue. I’m now wracked with guilt that perhaps it wasn’t the right decision and feel immensely lost without Her (when I first met my Wife to be, one of her first introductions to the family was looking after Tigger and Her sister Pippin whilst we were away). She’s always been a massive part of my Wife’s and my lives (we don’t have children so She’s been it really).

I know with everything else that’s going on for people on the forums, the loss of a cat isn’t a big deal but it feels a little cathartic to sharel; I hope that folk don’t mind.

Tough call, we had to have two cats put down last year, broke my heart. I cried for days over the first one, who had a brain tumour and was 100% healthy except his brain had decided not to bother eating or drinking again, so he was in for a slow death by organ failure. Felt really bad, but we had no real choice……

Sorry about your cat, mine are little shits a lot of the time but you do miss them when they’re not about.

It’s a tough decision, but it sounds to me like the right one. I’ve had to do it with two cats; one I left  a day too late and profoundly regret it – the second was maybe a week too soon, but I don’t regret that anywhere near as much.

My kids were young, and I wrote them a letter from the cat (as much for my benefit), I imagine it’s what she’d say to you now.

****
Dear Polly.
I know you will feel sad today. I know a lot of people will be sad because I made a lot of friends in my life. That’s OK, I hope you will remember me and talk about me with them.
But I don’t want you be too sad. I want you to know that when it was time to go, Mummy stroked me gently and the kind Vet helped me so that I didn’t feel anything.
Although I am not there any more, I thought you might like to know that I am in a very happy place. Where I am now it is always warm, but not too hot. I don’t feel old, or poorly, or hungry or tired. I feel just like I used to when we were first friends; I can run fast, and climb trees or if I want to I can sit on soft grass and think about all my friends. I am allowed to sleep on the beds if I want, and I have chicken every day.  If I close my eyes and imagine I can hear you and Elsa playing and laughing. And best of all – NO DOGS ALLOWED!

Please tell Elsa that although I miss you both, I am very happy now. Thank you for being my friendsand for letting me go when I needed to. That was very kind, even though it has made you feel sad. I will miss you.

Love from Jasper xx

******** formatting!!

Sorry to hear that.
It’s never nice & it doesn’t matter what people might say about it being ‘only a cat’ etc. they end up becoming a part of your family. There’d be something wrong with you if you didn’t feel upset & a sense of guilt over having your cat put to sleep.

But, from your description it sounds like you did the right thing. You know your cat & are best placed to make this kind of decision.

Oh dear, you have my sympathies.

We had a vile, antisocial, bitey bad-tempered fur-shedding git, but when she was put to sleep I was very upset. The first we knew she was ill was when she started snuggling up to us for the first time in ten years..

I used to think I could see her out of the corner of my eye.

Now we have a kitten who is seven months old and is rapidly shaping up to fill the boots of his predecessor! Still, I like having a cat around even if I am treated like a motorway service station most of the time..

Really sorry to hear that. Sounds like a nightmare. I suppose the consolation is that 20 years is a bloody good innings and I’d imagine a happy pampered life, at that.

She’ll be shredding the furniture in puddytat heaven

op anyone would feel the same. Passing away is no fairy tale but you did the right thing. Tigger had a great life and that’s the most you could do for any animal.

You did the right thing – its the hardest decision to take but the best thing that you can do for the love of your pet as you’re only really prolonging their suffering. I’ve had to do it twice now with our dogs – after the first one, I realised we should have taken the decision earlier. With our last, our Labrador I held her in my arms and shed copious tears at the vets – it was heartbreaking but still the right decision. We now have another 15 month old Labrador – our old dogs great, great niece.

the loss of a cat isn’t a big deal

You had her for 20 years. Of course it’s a big deal! One of ours battled through Christmas after a tough year for him and we’d made a bloody hard decision to let him go on the day after New Year’s Day – but he decided to go himself on the 1st. He’d been in our life for nigh on 17 years – and had been an all round awesome puss. I still miss him now when I walk into our bedroom and look at the corner where he’d spent most of his last year under the radiator.

They leave a big old hole in your life when they go. Don’t feel bad about feeling bad.

I could have written your post on Christmas eve just gone. Identical age. Also deaf. Looks were very similar. Also no kids. Our little one made a couple into a family of sorts. She went down hill from super healthy to wasting away to nothing over three weeks but we never got to the bottom of what was wrong.

She was put to sleep at home and the vet initially managed to put the sedation injection through a fold of skin and out the other side. Full of fight or flight adrenaline the poor wee thing got a new burst of energy and tried to run away and hide. Dragging her back out to face her last and the convulsions as it took its effect will be a rubbish vision I’ll never shift.

Time has past and I can now see it was still the right thing to do despite doubting ourselves at the time.We now can remember the happy little critter with fondness for the good time and don’t fixate on the last day so badly. You’ll get there too but it will take time.

Sorry to hear your news and can completely understand your feelings. We PTS two of ours and a stray we had been feeding for a year chose our garage for her final day, all three gone in 7 months. They are all now enjoying the sunniest corner of the garden and we have some fond memories…

We joke that they still go on food raids in the fridge at night but I admit that it might be me…..

Remember, she wasn’t “just a cat”, she was your cat and you have done the best for her for 20 years.

Aw, sorry to hear that…
Our mog went awol a few weeks ago, first time she’s gone out for more than 20 minutes since we moved into town, we were frantic. She suddenly appeared, like “whats all the fuss”, but made me realise how much i’m attached to her.
I’m sure you did the right thing.

It was definitely the right decision for Tigger, but you gave her many years of a good life so you should be happy about that.

The house will feel empty without her, don’t be afraid of going to find another cat soon – I did after the wife’s cat died (3 days later) and it was the right decision.

Anecdotally, I mentioned to one of our neighbours that I hadn’t seen their elderly tom cat for a while.

The neighbour said she noticed it lying in its favourite spot in the garden in the sun we had a few weeks ago. She’d been out and come back and the cat was still there in the sun. She went up to it & it was lying on its side, legs stretched, eyes closed as they do when they’re asleep.

What a way to go. Lying in the sun in the garden. Perfect.

They always say a day too soon is better than a day too late. It’s the last compassionate thing you can do for them.

I know how you feel though, it’s still very raw to me, having just lost one before Christmas. Chester was a ginger maine coon & he’d been in my life a long time & I looked after him when my ex & I split up, although he was her cat before I came along. She still came and saw him & she was with me & him at the end when the decision had to be made.

It was his time though, he had struggled with weight loss for a few months prior & them managed to get himself a cat cold which he just couldn’t shift & literally fell off a cliff over a few weeks. He ended up the same size as a normal cat & he was big, even for a Maine.

It was horrible, and has left a hole. We still have the other one who has helped fill the gap & he’s very much come out of his shell since, as the Alpha has now gone, but we really do miss him.

Pjay big hug dude, don’t beat your self up, sounds like Tigger had a great life. The little gits really get into you heart and leave a big hole when they go.

I’m now wracked with guilt that perhaps it wasn’t the right decision and feel immensely lost without Her

This, very much this….

They always say a day too soon is better than a day too late. It’s the last compassionate thing you can do for them.

I know only too well what you’re going, I had to say goodbye twice last year.

Bass was the first we had her and her sister Drum for eight years after taking them on as 10-year-old rescue cats. She’d been through thyroidectomies (having had a very bad reaction to the thyroid medication) and it was while she was recovering from the second that we noticed there was something wrong. A scan revealed she had multiple, inoperable brain tumours.

The vet gave her two weeks and a daily dose of steroids. The little bugger kept going for two months. Then one Friday she really perked up and was almost back to her old self. Saturday morning she was wobbly and deaf. Sunday morning we realised she’d gone blind. Sunday afternoon we said goodbye.

Three months later we took on another rescue. Bruce was a nine-year-old tripod but didn’t let that bother him. We knew he had hyperthyroidism and he’d had an op for it. Turns out the poor fella hadn’t had a follow-up blood test to check how the op went. We found out he was still hyperthyroidal when we recognised all the symptoms and took him to our local vet.

At first, the medication seemed to be working and then he started to change. Back to the vet to discover the thyroid medication was making him anaemic. Off the meds and see how he progresses with a view to a second thyroidectomy taking place.

However, we never got that far. He went downhill fast. We took him to the vet again and they kept him in for a scan. Turns out he had an enlarged aorta and fluid on his chest, along with all his other issues. There was an offer of an op to drain his chest, but no guarantee of how effective it would be, nor whether he would even survive the op. We held him and let him watch the birds outside the vet’s window as the vet helped him on his way.

I’ve left obituaries for both of them here on the Cats Protection Memory Wall.

And finally, the cats will…

<div>When humans die they make a Will</div>
<div>To leave their homes and all they have</div>
<div>To those they love</div>
<div>I too, would make a Will if I could write</div>
<div>To some poor, wistful, lonely stray</div>
<div>I leave my happy home</div>
<div>My dish, my cosy bed, my cushioned chair, my toy.</div>
<div>The well loved lap, the gentle stroking hand, the loving voice</div>
<div>The place I made on someone’s heart.</div>
<div>the love that at the last</div>
<div>Could help me to a peaceful, painless end, held in loving arms.</div>
<div>If I should die</div>
<div>Oh, do not say</div>
<div>”No more a cat I’ll have to grieve me by it’s loss”</div>
<div>Seek out a lonely, unloved cat and give my place to him.</div>
<div>This is my legacy.</div>
<div>The love I leave behind.</div>
<div>T’is all I have to give.
<div class=”yj6qo”></div>
</div>

Don’t feel guilty, you did the right thing.

We had Nelson, our useless mongrel, put to sleep in September. He was 17 and, basically, old and knackered. It was definitely the right thing to do, I have no qualms about that, but it was still chuffing horrible; I choked up booking the appointment, and on the day I cried when the sedatives kicked in and physically sobbed, hard, when it was over. They’re part of the family, it’s grief, pure and simple. Don’t be ashamed of it, it show’s you’re human.

Take care chap.

OP – you absolutely made the right decision!  At 19, she had a very long life for a cat, and it sounds like a good life as well. Try to remember the good times.

BTW, been in your position 4 times…

We’ve had cats for 40+ years. Recently had the last two put down.

It’s gut wrenching and there’s no shame in crying about it. We were told if you miss them enough to cry then you will have given them a good life.

Nothing anyone can say will make it easier. The pain will go, but the memories will be with you forever.

Yes, you did the right thing. Once quality of life has gone then it’s wrong to prolong the suffering.

Hope you’ve got some photos to remind you of the good times.

(Now I’m crying writing this!)

(Now I’m crying writing this!)

Yup, it got a bit dusty here too.

You did the right thing – its the hardest decision to take but the best thing that you can do for the love of your pet

This. Doing the right thing is very painful, but from your description it was the kindest thing to do after she had 20 years of a loving home.

It sounds like you did the right thing. There comes a point where it’s like “who are we doing this for exactly?” Feeling guilty is perfectly normal, please don’t beat yourself up about it.

I went through the same thing a few years ago, had to make The Decision with the little furball who had been my companion for 18 years. It about broke me. This was circa 2002 and I still well up thinking about it, it hit me harder than most losses of family members over the years.

There’s a little known English law, if anyone says “it’s only a cat,” it’s perfectly legal to punch them in the throat.

Sorry for your loss mate.

Thank you to everyone for your kind thoughts and memories (and the Cats’ Will is beautiful). Still struggling with thoughts of whether we rushed it or not and reliving the point where I gave permission to continue after calling out and stopping the procedure (and that She’d still be her if I hadn’t), although I recall last night with Her asleep on my chest under the duvet, holding her hoping that She’d slip quietly away and feeling a little sad when She moved (I think we knew then); the first thing I said to my Wife in the morning was that we couldn’t keep her going like this – She did seem very disoriented and confused. She complicated matters by enjoying Her breakfast this morning and purring away when we cuddled Her (I couldn’t get a purr out of Her all of last night).

It just hurts massively at the moment and it doesn’t feel like we’ll ever be happy again (although that will change); I’m also feeling rather afraid and panicky at times. Despite Her ailments (and I forget to mention in Her list that She also had an undiagnosed abdominal mass – we felt that investigations under anesthetic would be too risky) She was in fine form on Friday (my Wife’s birthday).

We’ve done some more crying and gone out for a walk in a world that’s currently painfully full of cats; hopefully time will ease things.

I don’t have a faith, but we’ve taken to burying our cats in the garden (Her Sister is there along with a lovely chunk of a grey, stray tomcat we took in) and planting a yew tree on the grave. I like the idea that they’ll be incorporated in a tree that could live for thousands of years.

Thanks again to everyone for their kindness and do keep posting, it really does help.
Paul (PJay)

We’ve got 5 cats under our back lawn. The first one went in 20 years ago, and the grass still grows greener over her. It’s a nice reminder. All summer we can see them.

Strangely enough when we took our last to the vet’s she purred on the wife’s knee more than she’d ever purred before. That really was gut wrenching.

A very tough decision made for what sounds very much like the right reasons.

Having been there, I feel your pain. Take care.

Hope you’ve got some photos to remind you of the good times.

Yes we’ve got a few photos and we’ll get some printed out. My Wife also has a talented colleague who’s doing a portrait of her.

Most of Her life over the last few years has been asleep on our bed (not a bad life by all accounts).

I miss Her stinky breath, the way She used to rub Her face on my chin and purr so loud it vibrated through my chest 😢

I know with everything else that’s going on for people on the forums, the loss of a cat isn’t a big deal but it feels a little cathartic to sharel; I hope that folk don’t mind.

These little creatures are family – it’s a massive loss. Thinking of you.

Nope your about perfect as A pet owner.

Nothing worse than letting a pet suffer needlesly just because you’d be sad or upset when they’re gone.

You have to love them properly to know when the time comes. It’s the crap bit of pet ownership

God it hurts. Last night was fitful & guilt ridden with me reliving all the points where I could have stepped in & taken Her home. My Wife is adamant it was the right decision but I’m struggling with the fact that we didn’t give Her more time.

Had a ride this morning (rather than sit in an empty house) but it was a sad affair.

I seem to be getting waves of fear & panic when I realise, again, that She’s gone for good & I can’t get Her back 😥

Hopefully time will help and my Wife (who’s struggling greatly too) can help each other through.

Thanks to everyone for their support.

Double Post.

I knew I shouldn’t have looked at this thread, I’m sobbing like a little baby.
Of course it hurts, it’s been nearly 20 years of your life spent together, and the house is empty for the first time in all that time (properly empty, not just waiting for the cat to come back). Logically you know she probably wouldn’t have hung on for much longer, and her prognosis means it kinda came down to you doing the best thing for her, or waiting til she popped her clogs of her own accord, hopefully in her sleep. All you can do now is just accept that it hurts, but maybe in a bit of time you’ll give another cat a lovely home for another 20 years.

I have a small dog who’s 9 years old and blind. She’s content enough now, and hopefully got another 6-10 years, but when she went blind it really reminded me in an unpleasant way that one day I’ll have to make that awful decision, and knowing it’s the right choice won’t make it any easier.

And that’s me blubbling again. Better go and wipe my eyes as I have to take said dog out for a walk