Do's and Don'ts of cycling

Just for a bit of fun, let’s hear a Do and Don’t of cycling

DO Tell your mate he looks silly if he turns up to the ride with his open face helmet and goggles

DON’T Arrive in the car park by doing a big skid! Skids are for kids!

Do ride all types of bikes, don’t head with a road group that average 45kph for the first 6km, until you’re fit enough (which I’m not).

Do get away from the internet and ride your bike occasionally.

Don’t take any notice of anything you read on the internet.

Funnily enough I often ride with an open face and goggles, and I like to herald the end of a ride with a big skid into the car park.

So I guess I would say DON’T tell other people how to have fun 😉

Don’t use apostrophes in the wrong place
Do be pedantic about grammar in forum titles

I thought this was going to be a fun thread. Then, I read this;

So I guess I would say DON’T tell other people how to have fun

Oh, teh ironing, etc!

😉

Do be pedantic about grammar in forum titles

If being pedantic, be sure to use the correct punctuation to end a sentence. (Hint – It’s a full stop.)

Do ride more.

Don’t frequent internet forums.

do cycle tour. involve beer.
dont ride a bike that is fashionable.

Don’t arrive in a car park and try to do a stoppie which is either a)pathetic or b)ends in you going OTB 😳

Do make sure you’re correct before pointing out people’s grammar mistakes.

Don’t do this while cycling.

I love skids
Wolly aged 27 and 1 month

😆

I’ll let you work out what is so funny.

Anyway, some more serious suggestions;
DO
Ride a Brompton. Everyone should try one!
Ride at night, off road, under a full moon without lights. Thrilling, and oddly moving.
Get lost. Properly lost. Something lovely about that feeling of “Oh. Erm” and then somehow getting it back.
Ride home after a few inappropriately quick beers at the pub after an after work ride.
Bodge a repair to get home. I AM McGYVER! (Etc!)
Help others to enjoy riding.
Take advantage of the edit function to amend any foolish spelling mistakes.

DON’T
Take it too seriously.
Think that your commute is a race.
Worry.

e, think you lost this Flashy. Sorry for spoiling aracer.
Oh you found it!
“O do keep up joat”

DO, you’re own thing.
DON’T compare yourself to others, you will never be the fastest or slowest.(Unless you are actually the fastest, then well done. Or the slowest, then it can only get better)

DO, you’re own thing.

Bravo!

CaptainFlashheart – Member
DO, you’re own thing.
Bravo!

Still paying attention I see!

Expanding on CFH’s suggestions.

DO

A night ride up in the proper mountains or even better on a bleak featureless moor, rather than your local woods.

DON’T

Suddenly get ‘into’ MTBing and go on and on to your cyclist colleagues about some five grand carbon thing you’ve just changed for another five grand carbon thing because the first one wasn’t ‘quite right’ when in fact you are a fat unfit knacker who wouldn’t know how to get the best out of any MTB carbon or otherwise.

DO – give well meaning advice on a forum if someone asks a genuine question for it.

DON’T – be a dick and give a dumb response that is of no use to the OP…

Do anything on your bike that makes you smile, skids, wheelies, endo’s anything.

Don’t put others down who are on bikes as they make us all smile. and a bad day on the bike is still better than a good day on the office unless your office is on a bike.

DO: The ONLY answer to Look at my new bike threads is “That looks ace, you must be dead chuffed”

DON’T: be a dick about how other folk choose to have fun.

DO Give way do dog walkers

DON’T Stop the dog going in for the foot bite if he’s going to get a lower jaw full of spikey pedal. It’s the only way they’ll learn.

DO have most fun.
DONT only ride trail centres.

Do: Keep your road bike in tip top condition.

Don’t: Give in to your legs, ever.

I love skids.

PJM, aged 41 years and one month.

Don’t: Ever say ‘Watch this.. ‘ before throwing yourself off the biggest drop etc.. it will end in tears.

Do: Fall over clipped in in front of a crowd, get up smile and bow whilst dying a little inside.

If your a roadie:

Do quote the rules
Don’t take them (too) seriously.

DO: The ONLY answer to Look at my new bike threads is “That looks ace, you must be dead chuffed”

Don’t: Comment on the bike at all
Do: Criticize the gardening or other landscaping faux pas.

Don’t forget to smile.
Do learn how to wheelie, it’s never too late.

Don’t shart in your Chamois.

Do use Vanish & pre soak if you do.

Do go on a night ride wearing a helmet light while it is snowing and spend hours pretending you are the millennium falcon.

Do
Go hard. Push yourself every now and again.
Smile. Riding a bike is awesome, look like your enjoying yourself.
Wave/say hello to fellow riders. It’s a nice thing to do.
Ask if people are OK when they’re stopped by the side of the road/trail. Most of the time they will be, every now and again your assistance may prove a big help.
Learn to fix your bike. It will save a couple of quid but will also and will also mean you will have a better appreciation of how things work
Observe the rules. Whilst also taking them with a healthy pinch of salt.
Encourage others to ride. But don’t push them too far or they will never ride again.

Don’t
Take it too seriously. You’re a grown up on a push bike, you look like a fool, embrace that.
Drop litter. Stuff it in your pocket and take it home.
Faff or me late. Bit of a personal one this as I don’t have a huge amount of spare time, if we’re meeting at 10am, be ready ride for 10am, don’t then need to get changed, pump up tyres, generally mess around.
Forget to blow a kiss the the driver who just cut you up/questioned your parentage/was a dick.

That’ll do for a start.

Do go on a night ride wearing a helmet light while it is snowing and spend hours pretending you are the millennium falcon.

Not just me, then… 🙂

DON’T
Ride out onto a fireroad and into a group of school children
Take one hand off the bars mid-jump just because there are two female MTBrs watching
Commit to a super booter/road gap and then realise you’re on the wrong bike
Assume your little bit of local Leogang won’t have somebody walking up it

Simple is always best.

Do – Ride lots
Don’t – Be a dick

Don’t take your love away, oh no, no, no.
Do be do be do.

Do – A night ride solo and get lost
A massive big mountain ride /tour
Shred the Gnar as much as you can at least once per month
Own more than one bike and not get bothered about road v MTB all bikes rock
ENJOY EVERY MINUTE OF IT BIKES ARE **** ACE

DONT

Worry about what size wheels you have
Worry about how many rings you have
have a garish coloured bike they look shit.

Don’t wobble.
Do wibble.

Try not to be a ****.

When you ride down a trail, and the trail crew are literally in the process of reopening it and you’re the first person ever to ride on a repaired section, with 20 people watching you, don’t do a skid.

Skids, I love ’em. Any decent ride should end in the car park 180 the dustier the better!

Try not to be a **** x2

Do not build sh*t ramps on someones else’s trail.
You want a jump line, make your own from scratch, or contribute on the original build.