Cocaine Bear, When you thought it safe to go in the water….

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cek9mr43x1xo

Cocaine nom nom?

How the hell do you drugs wipe a shark?

Other than “very cautiously”, obviously.

That’s pretty sad.

There’s all sorts of toxic junk we’re dumping into the environment these days.

Are the sharks huge coke addicts, or are they innocent bystanders, with their prey hitting the white chalk?

Saw the article earlier, funny, but also rather sad that our drugs are so concentrated in the oceans.

Its an incredibly bad indication of what damage we as humans are doing.

On a lighter note, let’s have your film titles.

The Meg 3 – All Cracked Up

Jaws on The Rocks

well, Sharkainado obvz – unless that’s already done

That’s really sad. Humans really are dicks. Would make a good shark film though. Cocaine Bear is a top film if you ignore the horrendous real life situation that gave the directors the idea.

Cocaine Bear is a top film if you ignore the horrendous real life situation that gave the directors the idea.

Theres all sorts of craappy spinofs on prime movies now, meth alligator and other such trash…

Yeah, but how was I meant to know smack head racoon wasn’t children friendly.

Fortunately they are not my kids, I just handed them back to my brother to deal with the impact of the harrowing tale of a cute woodland creatures descent into  addiction, crime, prostitution and eventually death.

But at least I don’t get asked to babysit anymore.

We really are cocking up the environment as humans.

Speed Jaws – when two surfers (Keanu and Sandra) can’t slow thier boat without the drug crazed shark catching them…but they’re running out of fuel.

Crack head Shark doo doo doo doo doo do

Crack head Shark doo doo doo doo doo do

Crack head Shark doo doo doo doo doo do

Crack head Shark

Saw the article earlier, funny, but also rather sad that our drugs are so concentrated in the oceans.

Well, it’s highly likely that boats loaded with hundreds of kilos of Bolivian Marching powder frequently sink before they get picked up by whoever the cartels sold it to, and the pelagic sharks are most likely to come into contact with the dissolved drugs in the water.

’Course, that raises another question: the Orca smashing up boats – are they after the drugs before the boats sink and the sharks get it?

Makes you think…

How the hell do you drugs wipe a shark?

Moreover,

Why?  What possessed biologists to test sharks for recreational drugs in the first place?  Is it just part of a broad spectrum testing process?

Why?

They had more sharks than normal turning up at rehab?

Did you miss this piece:

cocaine is making its way into the waters via illegal labs where the drug is manufactured or through excrement of drug users.

That is proper recycling!

What possessed biologists to test sharks for recreational drugs in the first place?  Is it just part of a broad spectrum testing process?

Biomagnification, innit. Apex predators rather than by virtue of having a big nose.

In theory seabirds could be coked up* too; remember that next time a gull sticks its beak in your chips and you decide to fight it off

*from fish it caught, not from chips 🙂

How the hell do you drugs wipe a shark?

Choosing a small species is the approach that they took 🙂

Next it will be turtles with SSRIs found in them

cocaine is making its way into the waters via illegal labs where the drug is manufactured or through excrement of drug users.

Might explain the ‘dopamine’ rush open water swimmers go on about. I mean all this complaining about the sewage – turns out it might actually be the good shit.

Totally Wim Hoff their faces.