<p>GF: You should get a tatoo like the guys on Sons Of Anarchy to go with your beard, it&#8217;d make you look tough and manly.</p> <p>Me: I&#8217;d rather the motorbike </p> <p>GF: disproportionate, incoherent and rambling rant about how I clearly don&#8217;t want a future together, house, etc.</p> <p>I&#8217;m starting to think I should record our conversations, just to be sure I didn&#8217;t say &#8220;I&#8217;ve slept with your mum&#8221; when I think I&#8217;ve said &#8220;I&#8217;d rather the motorbike&#8221;.</p>