40 is looming large for me, T-17 months.
Suspect it won’t be a crisis, more a continuation of previous events.
Never really understood the mid life crisis thing.
It's like openly complaining about your partner - no one else can understand why you'd basically rebel against something that you chose and no one else actually forced you into.
If it happens to me, I hope I have the wherewithal to keep it low key and not have big noisy exhausts attached to it!
Turning 51, and am obsessed with buying a 2018-2020 Suzuki Jimny.
Off to a gig at the 100 club this week, but apart from that...still love my wife, love my kids, love my job, love my dog and am pretty content.
I think I had a wobble last year, but it was down to not being able to train through injury.
i got all my idiocy out of my system in my youth, at a cost.
I was a total failure in my 20s. Worked hard, got promoted...and completely missed out.
Another one going through the menoporsche here…
🎩🎩🎩
Top midlife crisis ICE vehicles:
- Porsche 911: you never grew out of Top Trumps
- GS 1200: you are never going to ride through Argentina
- VW Campervan: you like camping but in the most expensive way possible, and without the space of a tent
- Honda Fireblade: you don't realise how fat you look in leathers
- Ford Capri: same as 911, but without being able to drive it anywhere because it's always broken
- Berlingo: you've given up
I'm saving up for a Berlingo to convert into a Campervan, and I'll stick a sarcastic VW badge on the front (and then cry myself to sleep because I don't have a VW)
Sex drugs and rock and roll was basically done and dusted by 30.
Not expecting a mid life crisis at this stage any more.
Incidentally. Nothing wrong with a capri. If you can afford one.
Assuming I'm still here at 80, I passed mid life a couple of years ago. I'm not sure about a crisis as such, I've had a steady realisation of what makes me happy and content which I didn't before.
The biggest change is now i have little patience for idiots or confrontation, which people wrongly assume means I'm a grumpy git. Far from it, I'm happier than I've ever been!
Bought an Alfa Giulia Quadrifoglio on the basis that I needed a bigger family car, that wasn’t our van. It sort of hits that remit, if you squint a lot. On reflection it’s a perfect MLCC and I was possibly in the midst of one.
My sportscar purchase was years before my crisis. Which had nothing to do with cars, and was shortly followed by changing career and location, getting married, settling down and having kids. Looking back on it, a very positive thing, stuff was getting a bit weird.
My younger wife (42) is having a full on MLC. It is tragic to see, proper Patsey and Eddie behaviour including the tie die!
We are getting divorced.
I call it mid life opportunity rather than crisis. I realised recently I know 8 people with Porches. Every one of them would have had one in their 20's but it wasn't possible.
Roll on 40's or 50's and a better job, mortgage under control and consequently disposable income is generally a bit higher. Opportunity knocks and boom - sports car.
I am perfectly happy, no crisis going on. Not really into cars but I do have a road bike that cost more than a 20 year old Boxster. Some work mates might label it a crisis but I'm very happy with it!
I’m 43 and never really thought about a midlife crisis. Just made a promise to myself to go on one cycling trip a year and I’ll be pretty happy.
Oh and do your MLC properly.
Woman half your age. Piss off to the Caribbean. Do very dodgy things. Otherwise you're just playing at it.
Considering my head is telling me I’m still in my mid-20’s, I’m not even close yet. On the other hand, my 69 yo body does tell me not to even think about doing anything faster than a moderate stroll.
Which is why I’ve taken up archery - I’ve got the time to do it, and I’m either standing still, or I’m strolling up to the target to retrieve my arrows. Which at the moment is 20 yds, as we’re getting ready for the indoor winter sessions, otherwise it’s 30 yds and up, as I get better. After a couple of hours, I think I’ve earned a pint or two… 😉
To add to the above, some people might consider spending nearly £900 on all the kit comes under a MLC, but a BSO can cost more than that, so 😜
I'm 52 and am considering doing a C1 training course so we can buy a bigger motorhome and piss off around Europe for 6 months.
Having just bought my first ever G-Shock my world is expanding.... 🙃
Turn 50 in December but no MLC yet, got two great kids, my health and a full head of hair, so all good!
Don't think one is looming, I just want to work a bit less and bikepack a lot more, and drink a bit of nice wine, gin and IPA along the way.
Although I enjoyed owning a Porsche, now that I’ve had one, I wouldn’t have another one as there are better things to spend my money on.
I was a total failure in my 20s. Worked hard, got promoted…and completely missed out.
Yep. Then redundant at 30. Poorer and more fulfilled since then.
Whilst on our joint midlife gap year, living in a motorhome during the pandemic, my partner and I met a guy in Southern Spain who proudly proclaimed he was going through a midlife awakening. He'd split from his wife and 2 teenage daughters and moved into a motorhome to go traveling with a new woman (not particularly young though). Seemed very happy and positive really.
My wife expects me to live to be 134, so no where near midlife yet, crisis what crisis.
I got the fancy sports cars and started doing track days in my late 40’s. Not so much a mid-life crisis but i just couldn’t afford them when I was younger.
MrsG bought a fancy horse and horse lorry. That makes my mid-life crisis spending look amateur.
I’m far too poor to afford a midlife crisis. I’d like a short travel full sus and a paddle board. Neither of which are looking likely. Does that count?
I’ve had the MX5 ten years now, do we get two?
My midlife crisis was taking up wakeboarding in a local cable park.
Cost me a cruciate ligament - have not put a wakeboard on again
Never really understood the mid life crisis thing.
It’s like openly complaining about your partner – no one else can understand why you’d basically rebel against something that you chose and no one else actually forced you into.
If it happens to me, I hope I have the wherewithal to keep it low key and not have big noisy exhausts attached to it!
Depends if by MLC you mean "buying a Porsche" or a mental health event centred around realising you're half way to dead and there are things in your life that are a long way off plan/you no longer recognise and understand who you are/where you want to be and what to do next?
To anyone who can't understand the latter I'd offer the following:
Did you never make a life altering decision that turned out to be really quite wrong and bad for you?
Never have a mental health issue that might drive feelings of helplessness or low self esteem?
Never made a choice that might have placed long term restrictions on you that's hard to reverse for practical reasons?
Has you work and chosen career slowly changed out of all recognition to something you spent 20+ years of your life investing in?
Did you make an unpalatable choice out of necessity not desire (e.g. you lost your job and needed to eat/support a family)?
Never had to take or stay in a job because you have kids to feed, a mortgage to pay or a retirement that is otherwise going to be in penury?
Partner left you breaking your self confidence, bank balance and relationship with your mutual friends?
Had a long term partner who is emotionally abusive or controlling?
Never been so consumed by doubt about the state of your future, the rate of change and disruption around you, the knowledge that from here on your body is unable to cash the cheques your mind wants to write?
Missed out on normal teens/20s/30s because you made bad decisions about friends or work or had to care for a relative?
Start putting a few of those together and a proper mid life crisis of mental well-being is a pretty likely outcome.
Once declining mental health gets in to the situation then change becomes harder, people feel trapped and things can escalate.
The yearning for youthful madness and less responsibility or fast cars is just one potential symptom of that malaise vs. using MLC as an excuse to do something you can finally afford to and it's now or never that you kind of always wanted anyway.
To the posters enjoying their Porsches I'm not having a dig at all (quite fancy a 911 myself but way too restrained to actually buy one when I could spend money on bikes) but given the OP's post and with Movember looming and focus on men's health including mental health I wouldn't want to dilute the serious issues behind the fast cars and new bikes.
Edit. I know that makes me sound like a fun sponge but there's a serious question in the OP that isn't related to buying stuff.
@stwhannah - this is my problem to solve! "I look forward to the days immediately ahead rather than dreading the days between now and some mythical future retirement when all good things shall come to pass."
Reasonably well paid but boring job. Away from home 2-3 nights a week and miss my wife & kids, all the while saying to myself that when I retire it'll all come good.
I'm 45 FFS.
Not interested in a Porsche etc. My mini MLC is definitely centred around an overwhelming feeling of apathy at work whilst pretending everyday to give a sh!t about work. The faking is very draining.
Very happy at home and good friends fortunately so I suck it up.
Ahhh all you whippersnappers 😉 when you come out the other side you'll think that sex thing was really overated and a good cooked dinner is much more satisfying, that and a nice pair of comfy slippers 👍
54, still working too hard.
After bringing my daughters up practically full time for the last 11 years, one has now fled the nest and one leaving in the next year or so.
No MLC planned, other than sticking the bike on the back of the motorhome and disappearing for as long as I can get away with it.
I'm single so can do whatever the hell I please. Never been happier.
Yep! Had a yearning for a motorcycle for the past couple of years. Something vintage ish, a Royal Enfield Inteceptor, Triumph Bonneville shaped bike.
I'm 43 now. If I got one I'm not sure I'd make it to 80s!
If buying things, then my whole adult life has been a midlife crisis. Thankfully these days, it isn't filling me with debt.
On the mental health thing, well, it's been a crisis since my early 20's and is getting worse. I turned 41 on Monday, and I remember once thinking I'd be dead by 40.
Not sure if a a midlife crisis, but definitely going through a period of certain things in my life dawning on me. I divorced about 3 years ago, from an unhappy marriage that I was only in for the kids sake. Looking back I should have left years ago when I realised I had no love or even any positive feelings towards my ex wife.<br />I have realised that it’s probably me who is incompatible with being in a relationship and I’m happy to be single. I have female friends whom I see, one more regularly than the others. They are all younger than me, I’m 50, they are either in their 30’s or early 40’s. The relationships are predominantly physical as opposed to any feelings or expected future plans. <br />I would think people may look at my life and thing it’s a MLC.
I’ve done the nice/fast cars through my earlier life, two 911’s, AMG Mercedes an Aston, VW T6 campervan and am now driving a Cupra.
My divorce was mentally horrendous. I’m not going into detail, but it was awful, still is. I’ve lost the ability to believe people can be good humans. It’s easier to keep feelings at a distance. Again possibly mid life crisis. Hard to say. (Hope this doesn’t sound negative, I have a really good life - I just didn’t for a long time)
nope, always been pretty content with my lot, never wishing to look younger, impress anyone or stand out.
55, I feel the same. Never been a grass is greener person and just accept who I am and whatever happens. If I didn't do certain things when younger that is because it wasn't for me or I didn't choose too so nothing to try and make up for in a desperate bid for something.
I'm 50 think I've been struggling with this for the last 10 years!
Recently bought a Basso road bike as a 50th birthday prezzie to myself. There won't be any Porsches as i've got a huge mortgage which runs until I'm 66 and 2 daughters to put through Uni.
Over the last 18 months i've grown increasingly dis-satisfied with my fairly well paid job in Project Management and will be looking to move on in the new year - with 16 years left at work fear of change has been surpassed by fear of missing out on something better, which has to be a good thing.
Hmmm Midlfie crisis seems an expensive event, tbh I thought it was one of those things that only happen in films and not real life 🙂
And TBH who's planning on dying anyway,better to aim to live forever and be proven wrong 🙂
If we are talking expensive midlife events, then does my dog count? I spent literally thousands shortly after she arrived finding out she has an auto-immune problem and a love for eating tennis balls.
I did take up bouldering after 40, but so far all that's cost me is 2 pairs of shoes and some chalk.
Perhaps "crisis" is too strong a word, but at the age of 43 I'm into that period when I've had a re-think of my priorities.
I was very driven in my early adulthood and ticked a lot of boxes: career, family, financial. But then there was ill-health amongst wider family and friends, and this changed my outlook.
I recommend doing a "wheel of life" every so often. If it says you need more Pork in your life, then fair play. Mine said I should put my first efforts into my home relationships and spend more time on my bike. 😉
The downside is that I'm limiting my ambitions in some areas and we're definitely scoring a bit low on the white Range Rover & swimming pool lifestyle-ometer. But I do feel more healthy and everything we have is ours.
Hmmm Midlfie crisis seems an expensive even
It takes half a lifetime to save up for one!
I have an overwhelming urge to try and build the crossbow guy from walking dead's motorbike
I know nothing about mechanics and have no license. But, tbh that is part of the appeal. I am pushing myself to get this house done before I take on yet more stuff. Mortgage rates may block it though 🙁
During lockdown I dug out my old GW games and models and started painting again which I stopped when I went to college. Turns out I'm quite good.
@stwhannah – “I look forward to the days immediately ahead rather than dreading the days between now and some mythical future retirement when all good things shall come to pass.”
That's where I'd love to be. 51 now and I just seem to feel as if I'm trying to last out until retirement to really enjoy me life which is definitely not the right or healthy thing to do.
Similar to others I have a good, decently paid job and a great family ( older parents, teenage and university aged kids do bring their own stresses) but feel like I'm not really living my life or at least making the most of it.
I may buy things, like bikes and have a camper van but I know material possessions arent really the answer. I'm having more of an emotional mid life crisis than a costly one!
I hate the term “Mid-life crisis” because for me it was overwhelmingly a positive, healing process.
It was precipitated by working in a toxic workplace that made me depressed. I had thought it was my dream job.
For me it was about letting go of all the baggage I was carrying about what I should and shouldn’t be, and learning to step outside my comfort zone.
I used to do things based on how I thought they would be perceived by others, these days I say and do what I actually want to do.
The younger girlfriends and sports cars etc were all experimentation, something that many people do when they were younger.
What matters is being with the right person, not how old they are, or how good they look in a bikini. And what makes them right is how we work together. I’ve not met her yet, and that’s also ok.
Sports cars are fun. IMV mountain bikes are funnerer and generally cheaper (as long as they’re not sat gathering dust in a garage), and are also better for my health.
One of the other major things that I’ve realised is that cutting outgoings is a far better way to feel richer than working harder to earn more money. I do realise that by being single and having no dependents I’m privileged to be able to do this, but that’s part of the swings and roundabouts of relationships. For people trapped in a toxic relationship I feel huge sympathy, because that must be hard.
Honestly though, my mid-thirties on have been some of the best times of my life. My health is good, I have an interesting job, and I earn enough money that I’m able to do some of the things I want to do, and save up for some of the others.
Not at the 'mid-point'. Had it aged 28. After what I now now was a significant accumulation of trauma, I was a ****ing weapons grade belter.
After some therapy and hard work I'm where I need to be with what makes me happy; no regrets, but no desire to experience dick-****tery like that again.
Well, I think I had one, possibly starting around 36 when my dad died, then an old friend killing himself a year later. It didn't feel like what I thought a MLC would be, so I never joined the dots, but lots of internalised anger, loss of confidence, feeling a bit lost for a few years. Ended up going to therapy, which helped figure a few things out and how they still affect me as an adult. No expensive purchases, or bucket-list stuff though
Similar to Cheekyget....sold sensible car, finally treated myself to an Abarth, big grins car, husband very rarely gets the chance to drive it 🙂 As for all the other midlife schizzle....well, menopause, accumulating weight around the middle regions, brain fog, angry Hulk moments....apart from that, all going well!!
