[Closed] Who fancies a crisp butty?

Unless they have Gammon Tudor, i'm out.

It's set to be the first pop-up UK 'restaurant' of its kind and is due to open for one night only in Bristol on August 30.

GET IN THE ******* SEA!!!!!!

All those crisps are in my local Asda/Morrisons.

They were wrong then and are still wrong'uns now. Crisp = potato/oil/salt.

I bet Binners(crisp aficionado)is looking for flights to Bristol right now.

There's only one reason you'd find Binners at a "pop-up 80's crisp restaurant"

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Cotswold massif trip up the Avon, night of the 29th. anyone?
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Arse, I've just eaten a bag of ready salted walkers, and I've got some thick white bread in the kitchen.

Right in the mood for a crisp sandwich now.

Roast Beef Monster Munch and mayo is nice, or blue squares + marmite.

Worst without a doubt for me are (or were) sweetcorn flavour crisps by Seabrook.

They would not make a good butty.

Used to work with a guy who was 6ft 5 and could eat like a horse. A 48 bag box if crisps was not out of the question....

Highlander Ayrshire bacon and brown sauce flavoured crisps on a buttered roll...marvellous!

Crisp butty's are the best thing in the world.

Specifically....

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And controversialy

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However, anyone who uses the word 'pop up' with regard to crisp butty's should be forced to watch other people eat them while being force fed bran flakes and vegan cheese and being periodically tazered

You're a really becoming so much of an anti purist, that you're becoming a purist yourself Binners.

I'd taser you for that.

I don't like crisps. The
Flavourless chip scrapings or disgusting, hurty, artisan toss.

Anything almost, but not actually a crisp is far superior.
It's all about Monster Munch, Quavers, Wotsits, Hula Hoops, Space Invaders innit?

Crisps are hanging.

I'd taser you for that.

I'd taser him for funsies 😉

We do lots of cool things in Bristol, but this is just silly.

Who TAF could eat £9.50 worth of chipstix anyway!?

Two slices of nice soft white bread, healthy smearing of dairylee on each (no butter) and a bag of salt and vinegar chip sticks.

Nearly the same as binners, but dairylea holds it together much better once scrunched 😆

And one for the 'new school' - Cheese topped rolls with frazzles. No spread or anything, although it's a bit messy and you need a drink.

Wrong again binners, Seabrook's sea salted FTW, and I'm now going to have to walk round to Morrisons to get some !

Pfft, always with the cheese singles...

A few facts from 70's kid:

Any crisp is better between thick slicesof soft white bread that has been spread with lashings of cool, creamy butter. Once assembled be sure to hammer them flattish with the heel of a fist*. You may have to lick some stray butter from your hand.

Walkers brand crisps are greatly improved (even superior) if consumed in this fashion.

The most buttie-friendly crisp-flavours are salt and vinegar or basic cheese and onion. None of that 'soured cream' or 'chives' nonsense. Tyrells 'naked' crisps are a great base to add yr own salt and vinegar to suit taste. Corn-snacks (as much as I adore beef Space Raiders) are right out, with the partial exception of Frazzles**

I don't like crisps.

Yes you do. Everyone likes crisps. Silly talk.

* I once hammered a back of particularly over-sized and rock-like pork scratchings in this fashion with the intention of breaking them down into manageable/shareworthy pieces, only to pierce hand with a freak pork-splinter! Never saw that coming.

**If you don't mind the resulting effect of tongue cleaving to soft-palate in attempt to remove sticky-gak.

bacon crisps (frazzles, or supermarket own-brand variants thereof) added to a sandwich makes a bacon substitute that is actually better than bacon itself.

They are also suitable for vegetarians. Just sayin'

*Edit - just read OP linked 'article' and it appears to be a blatant 'special offer' ad for Asda?

For balance - '6 meaty' multipacks of Lidl's own Snaktastic ridge-cut crisps are only 75p and taste 'just like the good old days'. I tried them. V good bacon, chicken and beef crisps. Just like the old days!

Anyway, am v excited about this 'glue it with Dairylea' thing. I'm going to do it! Possibly today! (Flaps arms runs in circle)

As an aside, I have a sliced loaf of brown bread and so just envisaged building a crisp sandwich with it. Both brain and stomach revolted in unison. Curious.

If it was genuine 80s retro crisps I.e. They had the factory knock up some Tomato Sauce monster munch (the zenith of crisps which will never be bettered) I would be driving the 200 miles to Bristol and setting up camp so as to be first in the queue.

However, as pointed out, you can buy them all in the supermarket and actually it sounds a bit shit.

If it was genuine 80s retro crisps I.e. They had the factory knock up some [s] Tomato Sauce monster munch[/s] Smiths 'Horror Bags - cheese and onion 'Fangs' flavour (the zenith of [s]crisps[/s] corn snacks which will never be bettered) I would be driving the 200 miles to Bristol and setting up camp so as to be first in the queue.

(Fixed)

However, as pointed out, you can buy them all in the supermarket and actually it sounds a bit shit.

Agreed, it does. In fact it sounds like so many of these 'pop-up' doodads - they are simply daft things we used to talk about do/cook-up when we were bored students ie 80's nights, endless over-reverent chatter about best snacks (!), cheesy TV shows, weird recipes, pointless treasure hunts for pointless prizes, etc etc - but certain super-self-conscious millennials (ironically) seem to demand someone else organize their fun with added 'authenticity' in the shape of 'ticketed event' that costs lots of money. Sounds 'awkward' and aching' rather than simple fun.

Anything almost, but not actually a crisp is far superior.
It's all about Monster Munch, Quavers, Wotsits, Hula Hoops, Space Invaders innit?

While these things are all indeed things of joy and wonder, they have no place between two slices of Warbies. That needs to be the traditional potato based variety in 'traditional' flavours

They had the factory knock up some Tomato Sauce monster munch (the zenith of crisps which will never be bettered)

That does indeed sound like the holy grail and would seem to prove the existence of God

Off the back of this, i will be breakfasting on a double fried egg sandwich with a large amount of frazzles added into the mix today.

Seabrook's

Talking of these, I always wondered how they got their crisps to taste mostly of air and oil? They have this un-crispy, slightly crispless-ness, ie a bit soft and airy. Then the oilyness/oil-taste is definitely up-front, with the advertised flavourings (and even the taste of potato) taking a back-seat while the ever-so-slightly-burned oil-taste prevails.

Definitely an inferior crisp on every attempt (IMO of course). As a result it is a crisp I rarely visit, and if I do it is simply to check if they have improved of late.

You're all so close yet oh so far. The king of the crisps, both for direct and intra-bread delivery, was, and will always be:

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Definitely an inferior crisp on every attempt

GET IN THE ******* SEA!

The Sandor Clegane of the crisp world.

Will mercilessly kick your head in but you'll enjoy it nonetheless.

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Mrs Binners recently returned home with a 6 pack of those beauties PP. The crisp worlds equivalent of a 3am fight in a kebab house. Brutal!

I'd also recommend tracking these babies down...

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Smiths 'Horror Bags - cheese and onion 'Fangs' flavour (the zenith of crisps corn snacks which will never be bettered)

Hmm, Claws were also very tasty and have yet to be bettered, though Roast Beef Monster Munch (original) was a good stand-in if Horror Bags weren't available.

I could easily neck a few bags after a swim in the Central in Reading. Obviously followed by a hot Bovril...

Mrs Binners recently returned home with a 6 pack of those beauties

Every self-respecting crisp-addict should know instinctively that brannigans multibags only come in 5 packs.

brannigans multibags only come in 5 packs.

...because the sixth bag will kill you.

bearnecessities - Member
Mrs Binners recently returned home with a 6 pack of those beauties
Every self-respecting crisp-addict should know instinctively that brannigans multibags only come in 5 packs.

I am starting to wonder if binners is really just an internet construct and is actually some fixie riding chap in a set of tweed jodphurs who eats artisnal vegan lid only pies served on slates whilst drinking over hoppy £13 a "glass" craft beer from a jam jar trolling us all.

You could be right, every so often the mask slips... I bet he really lives in Brighton and can't even draw...

I bet he really lives in Brighton and can't even draw...

One of those things is definitely true 😉

I'm actually a Tory Peer in the House of Lords

Well stop that, it'll stink the place out and someone will have to mop it up.

binners - Member
I'm actually a Tory Peer in the House of Lords

That's clearly nonsense too. Everyone knows there are no peers in the house of lords by this point as they've already clocked up their minimum hours to claim full pay and expenses.

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It's all well and good trying to post photo evidence but we all know he's in the white house not the lords...

Cheese XL with margarine on white bread.

The continental version includes peanut butter.

Oh and a peanut butter sandwich with mini cheddars is great too.

Finally. I'd climb a mountain for a cannae bag o Tudor...