[Closed] When you realise your friends are nobs

I'd have forgiven the bigotry, misogyny and evolution denial. However, I'd draw the line at golf and F1.

Where the f!c5 do you live? Sunderland?

Lol, + 1 on the golf. 🙄

Hang on, loads of my essex mates play golf. ****ers 🙄

*sends hate mail*

read the title and thought 'nah - likely you're just being the nob', however you've got me convinced with the body of your post. find some new friends. seriously. or get a dog. or both.
run. run far away.

They are generally bigoted, not very bright - all don't 'believe' in evolution, but believe in god - misogynistic, casually racist and think people who ride bikes are weirdos

Apart from not believing in evolution, they seem alright to me - what's the problem ?

And not believing in evolution isn't that big a deal imo.....I know plenty of people who refuse to believe that the history of all societies is the history of class struggles, despite the overwhelming evidence.

They like golf and F1... and here lies the problem.

golf, football, fishing, and f1, all nobber occupations.

You rarely see women involved in any of them,

Sometimes, you just need to move on. I've found that with some people recently. So I'm gradually moving away from that. It's just the way it is.

I had a laugh at this post , I went through the same ( awakening )2 years ago and basically binned them all !! Took up triathlon and mtb'ing and have met far better people with it , I now see my old friends every now and then but they bore me stupid !! Still living their boring lives and still either moaning or talking s**t !!

Ditch them and move on, friends come and go.

I made some close mates at uni in my late teens. but when they were still ingesting a vast amount of class A's and womanising 5 years later I knew it was time to move on.

You rarely see women involved in any of them,

Yeah - and mountain biking is like a totally women-dominated sport, or at least totally equal man.

I'm sorry - I believe your logic to be flawed.

Nobs or Knobs ?

You have a lot in common with them - 10 years of shared experiences and bro-ship. If it's got to where you can't stand being in the same room as them in case the stupidity is contagious, then maybe it's time to move on. I doubt it though, takes more than the low level beaut behaviour you're describing to trash ten years of friendship.

Just wind down the socialising with them for a bit if they're doing yer swede in.

I made some close mates at uni in my late teens. but when they were still ingesting a vast amount of class A's and womanising 5 years later I knew it was time to move on.

Some of my oldest friends still cane it a bit too much. They have grown up a bit and do other stuff apart from class A's and drinking.

In my youth I was friends with some right tools. Thankfully I got rid of them.

What do you do when you've know people for that length of time and are part of their social circle but you don't have anything in common?

think people who ride bikes are weirdos

What have you talked about for 10 years?

When you're stuck in a rut with friends and getting on (I'm assuming you're near middle age and with kids if you're on here at 9 at night) it's sometimes tricky to imagine where you'll find a new circle of friends but despite my tendency to rant and ability get thread deleted through my complete inappropriateness at times, I actually met a group of guys, husbands of my wifes friends, all hardened singlespeeders, and its ticking along nicely.

You never know whats round the corner and theres always STW if you're lonely.

If we were all the same the world would be boring place but on the golf front:
My house is virtually on a golf course I walk my dog, run and sometimes bike around the edge of the course, its such lovely place to be. The amount of blokes I have seen having hissy fits even throwing clubs into the trees is unreal I just dont get it, why do something which costs a fortune and makes you that unhappy. leave the clubs at home as your ruining a nice walk.

Where the f!c5 do you live? Sunderland?

How very un-bigoted.

People drift, move on. All that crap about mates being for life is not necessarily true.

I know what you mean, but in different circumstances. I found it profound when I connected with some of my current friends in much less time than the entire 'friendships' I had allegedly forged over years.

You appear to have long outgrown them, move on. Crap friends are easily humoured too, you may never to break up. But get to know new people and by being yourself immediately you can cut out the bullsh*t stage. Not easy though!

I am the nobber in the group that everyone thinks is a dick 🙁

i've a group of 5 "mates" like that back in the UK. still living in the same area they grew up (not a bad thing in itself, but have you ever been to Chadwell or canvey Island in Essex?), going to the same shit awful bars and clubs we used to frequent when we were 17, still rate the quality of their weekend by how much they drunk, have never read anything more challenging than the Sun and are generally a bit narrow minded.

i don't miss them. i doubt they miss me, but i'm glad in a way that i no longer have contact to them.

what alpin says.you've grown up,it's time for a bigger pond.
I really should write for a living,me.

Move on

hahah "hardoned singlespeeders", I'll save that one along with power rangers and stormtroopers

You know what I mean TJ, they could have ridden 150 mm travel round the bridleways of North Leeds, instead they like riding and tearing legs off, works for me.

I know plenty of people who refuse to believe that the history of all societies is the history of class struggles, despite the overwhelming evidence.

have you ever been to Chadwell or canvey Island in Essex?

I'm from Chadwell Heath. I haven't been back there since I left for Uni in 1988.

BenHouldsworth - Member

You know what I mean TJ

It wasnae me Ben

Apologies, who is this randomjeremy? Is it like the episode of KnightRider when there was the evil Michael dopplerganger?

I think the name says it all

buzz-lightyear - Member

have you ever been to Chadwell or canvey Island in Essex?

I'm from Chadwell Heath. I haven't been back there since I left for Uni in 1988.

nah, sorry, Chadwell St Mary... although it's probably on a par with the Heath...

and then you've got places like Ockendon and Aveley.... arrgghh! used to hate driving through there at night.

I know plenty of people who refuse to believe that the history...

Maybe they just refuse to listen to yet another excerpt from your prized Che biography 😀

They think riding bikes is for weirdos? They seem very clued up. 😆

To the OP - are your friends all ramblers? Weren't they on a video here yesterday?

I class myself as a luck lad to have kept my school friends into my 40's. We don't see each other as often as we should but its like it was yesterday when we do.

All that growing up we did together cannot be ignored, they are a part of what made me the man I am today. I have made new friends since then, some through my clubbing years and now some through bikes. You can have both 🙂

Have you noticed though that no matter how old you get and no matter how much you have changed, when you get together you all slot into the roles you have had since childhood! 😯

OP, is that why you don't like your old mates?

Apart from the Golf bit...

Sometimes, you just need to move on. I've found that with some people recently. So I'm gradually moving away from that. It's just the way it is.

+1

I had a group of friends I'd been close with for 10 years +. then i realised I didn't really like them anymore (or was it they didn't like me!). always me making the effort to include them, them bitching about each other (and no doubt me) behind backs, always doing drugs, and then lying to their wife's, and friends about doing them. final straw was when I had my son, not one of them made any effort to come and see him. Haven't spoken to them in a year.

But they will be in the pub complaining that having a kid changed you.

Perspective innit?

What he said.

I deliberately disassociated myself from most of my friends from my late teens and twenties, we were all up to no good and I've since moved on, quite a few of them still haven't and now in late thirties. Now have a very small group of mates and we've all known each other since we were 4-6, it'll always be thus. Proper friends I can trust through thick and thin.

It's definitely the golf and F1 bit, isn't it.....?

Yeah mainly the Gold and F1 that tipped me over the edge. As someone else suggested, maybe I'm the nob. 🙂

Sorry to come across all Sheldon like, but the friendship dynamic is often based on shared interests, attitudes, experiences etc.

You have changed and grown up from the sound of it. I think you only really keep friends if the above remains true. Nothing wrong with expanding your social group. Try and take the good ones with you !