When it is all over...
 

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[Closed] When it is all over and done with...

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For years I've teased my nearest and dearest that when I die I want my ashes to be launched off the summit of Cadair Idris in a rocket. It started off as a bit of a silly joke that then became what I really did want for a while. Older and wiser I can see that this would be a real pain in the neck for all involved, so my plans are changed. I still want to be cremated, I still want my ashes to remain here in Wales although whereabouts exactly I'm not certain.

Weirdly, I'd quite like to design and make my own coffin beforehand too, to save a bit of faff for those who will eventually end up dealing with what's left of me after my organs have been harvested. Am I a bit odd?


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 12:33 am
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I'm thinking of this place

http://www.cairngormsnaturalburials.co.uk/

though there are a few other wilderness places I'd also like.

However, I know that there are concerns over ash scattering at popular spots like Ben Nevis as the minerals are affecting the local ecology.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 12:39 am
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Am I a bit odd?

Nope, on a personal level you should do whatever you fancy, but on a practical level one of the most difficult aspects of planning a funeral is doing what you believe the deceased would have wanted. If you've made your own coffin, then your next of kin have one less decision to make as they know that you want to be cremated inside the crappy old box you made.

Basically the more precise a guide you can leave the easier it is for all concerned and making that task easier is one last gift you can leave behind.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 12:42 am
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seems like a sensible plan. Having to unfortunately arrange 2 funerals myself I know it really helps to leave detailed plans plus coffins cost a fortune.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 7:45 am
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To me it is a little strange to be concerned about what happens to your remains but I accept I may be in the minority. I wouldn't want to become some sad looking grave anyone felt obliged to tend to so I say scatter my ashes to the four winds and try not to get a face full 🙂


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 7:59 am
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Cremation is problematic on several environment levels.

To address that I've arranged instead to be mulched. Much the same ceremony as a cremation but with a chipper instead of a furnace - the only real difference is as the coffin slides behind the curtain the mourners will all be handed ear defenders.

Later they'll take a barrowload of my remains to a favourite local beauty spot to be [s]scattered[/s] forked in.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 8:09 am
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Well done for at least thinking about it.

In my recent experince death in the UK is fairly shite with the blame split equally between individuals who dont make provision, funeral providers who have commercialised the after death bit and the nhs which has industrialised the dying bit.

I would think about your preference pre death and others afterwards.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 9:42 am
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Oh..and I dont believe those coffins arent frequently re sold which given the completely bonkers process of making an elaborate box then burning it should actually be encouraged.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 9:48 am
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Told the wife that I don't want a funeral. Just get new burned and put the ashes where she wants. Don't want to saddle anyone with any costs other than my cremation.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 9:58 am
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Loving the way that I am now getting adverts for Simba mattresses and Oak Furniture 8)


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 10:00 am
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been singing this in my head all morning thanks Op.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 10:01 am
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You've got to plan, do it now. Don't let anyone else plan it for you, it'll be a disaster and they'll end up being lazy and putting no thought as to what you actually want.

I'm going here, it's already planned..

[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 10:02 am
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I'd be quite happy for my nearest and dearest to dump my mortal remains in a skip. What difference does it make? I'll be too dead to notice anyway.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 10:14 am
 myti
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Past doing the most environmentally sound thing at the least expense possible I couldn't care less what happens to me as I'll be gone.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 10:17 am
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I have left strict instructions that, after my untimely demise, my body is to be stuffed and posed on the end of the sofa clutching the TV remote as a constant and lasting reminder of our marital vows.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 10:17 am
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I have friend whos daughter works in a crem. I asked the question about getting your ashes back and would they really be yours?

Answer, not a chance. Unless your some really important.

Anyway, I had my Nans back (well somebody anyway) but they are scattered in a nice place now.

Gives good memories.

Ps Direct funeral is all you need, straight to the crem. Good night, frcking Irene!


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 10:20 am
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Tempted by one of these...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fantasy_coffin

[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 10:20 am
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when we got my mum's ashes I was surprised how much there was. It took over 10 minutes with everyone having a go to get them scattered.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 10:35 am
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binners - Member

I'd be quite happy for my nearest and dearest to dump my mortal remains in a skip. What difference does it make? I'll be too dead to notice anyway.

I'm not quite as glum as that, but as far as my corpse goes I couldn't care less, whatever is cheapest / most useful for whoever I leave behind really. In my mind I've always separated the person from the body after death. I loved my grandparents dearly, but I've never visited their graves after they were buried.

jekkyl - Member

when we got my mum's ashes I was surprised how much there was. It took over 10 minutes with everyone having a go to get them scattered.

They don't always give you all of them either - they fill whichever vessel you want and dispose of the rest. It's quite a lot, about 2.5Kgs or 3 litres in volume for a 12 Stone person.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 11:38 am
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Yes I'd like a sky burial on top of the London Eye please.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 12:11 pm
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Isn't cremation a waste of potentially good food source or is that bad science and our value finds its way back into the food chain even after burning?


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 12:18 pm
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I really don't give a s*** what happens to the rotting meat shell once it quits working. Boot it in the river Irwell or something.
Or one of them feed a tree pods seem a good idea.
It seems a total waste to blow all them nutrients and minerals up a chimney or fill them full of formaldehyde and make them unavailable to the ecosystem


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 12:42 pm
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TBH it won't make any difference to me! But part big lebowski and part childhood holiday, I've requested that my ashes be scattered off a big rock outcrop at Portnaluchaig. It's a lovely place and the family all remember it, it just feels right to me.

Alternatively, mix me into a barrowful of type 2 and use me to fill in a braking bump.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 2:01 pm
 DezB
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I used to think, oh, I must have a non-religious ceremony, bury me in the woods, whatever, but really, it doesn't matter - funeral is for the people left behind, so they can do what they want.
Particularly realised this after my Dad's funeral, where we had some stories told and no religious stuff whatsoever, even though in his later years he'd been going to church. We played Free's Alright Now when the coffin went in the furnace, he liked that song, but I don't think he knew! 🙂


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 2:17 pm
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...and try not to get a face full

Happened to me when we scattered my mum, she would have laughed. 🙂

Is it expensive to get buried at sea?


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 2:35 pm
 km79
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Is it expensive to get buried at sea?

Depends on how worried you are about the legality.


 
Posted : 29/12/2016 3:31 pm