Based on recent experience, I'm going to nominate standing on a large slug in your bare feet. It's the slight unyielding [i]bounce[/i] that does it.
Honourable mentions for:
-Pulling on wet kit.
and (middleclasstrackworld response)
-Grinding coriander seeds with a pestle and mortar (imagine a million sets of nails scraping down a million blackboards).
For me it was waking up with a long legged spider in my mouth (having been dreaming I was eating a spider with long legs).
Taste.
Particularly the taste when you find the whole cardamom pod hidden in your curry.
I'm going to nominate standing on a large slug in your bare feet. It's the slight unyielding bounce that does it.
A good nomination but having done the same (in the dark) to a large frog I'll up it to that.
Standing in a wet patch on the kitchen floor while wearing socks.
Itchy clothes like wool. Especially in hot weather. 😯
While gardening, stepping back and discovering from the slimy crunch that a large snail had got inside your welly.
The dentists drill, both sound and feel.
1, Walking downstairs in the dark in the morning to find out your dog has s**t on the floor and you found out this has happened by stepping in it with your bare foot.
2, Cleaning up the dog s**t from the carpet.
3, Cleaning hair from blocked drain/plug hole.
4, Walking through a head height Spider Web and having it run across your face
Then removing the wreckage
1, Walking downstairs in the dark in the morning to find out your dog has s**t on the floor and you found out this has happened by stepping in it with your bare foot.
If you get yourself a diabetic dog you can recreate this every morning.
Baby sick down the back of your neck.
Belizian sand flies, not painful as such, more like your entire skin has become sentient and is trying to break free.
Sugar soap/water running down your arm and into your arm pit while prepping a ceiling for painting.
For me it's a very specific taste, peanuts. I have a mild allergy to them and the sensation when I accidentally eat them is just horrible.
Standing in a wet patch on the kitchen floor while wearing socks.
+1 .... for Touch
Listening..... to Mumford and Sons 😀
Taste.... Corriander.... Devils weed
Sight... Looking at Jimmy Carr smug boat.
Smell ... Tarmac being laid
Stepping in cat sick, in socks :/
High velocity fly to the back of the throat while cycling.
A good nomination but having done the same (in the dark) to a large frog I'll up it to that.
mine was a toad, but this ^
Enforced piped 'music'.
watching England play football
Panic attack
I did the barefoot slug one last week. horrible sensation, only topped by my next step being onto a snail. squidy, crunchy with sharp edges.
Enforced piped 'music'.
...the worst example being when you're walking through B&Q, hear the opening bars of a song you like then realising that it's not the original, but some neutered, factory-farmed cover, designed to allow them to avoid paying the publisher.
Grrrr...
Possibly too yucky even for this forum. Involved a then girlfriend.
Use your imagination... 😯 😳 🙁
the moment when you are following a great, interesting thread and someone mentions helmet wearing
Needing to wee really REALLY badly whilst in the middle of a long and important phone call.
Having said that, the relief is almost orgasmic!
Or,
Watching my sales director try and do anything using a computer...
following though
The moment just after you realise you've wiped dog sh*t off your glove, onto your face. And you have a good few days growth on your face for it to get really bedded in to. And you're at the furthest point from home.
Negative G
Mr Woppit - Member
Possibly too yucky even for this forum. Involved a then girlfriend.Use your imagination...
You found out she was a Christian?
Nerve function tests. Super fine acupuncture style needles that glide deep into your flesh effortlessly and entirely painlessly. Then they attach a set of jump leads to them and start pulsing increasing voltages between them until you involuntarily shout an expletive. Its not painful as such (especially as the nerves being tested weren't really working) but just a strange, elevating annoyance.
Panic attack
This for deffo..
High velocity fly to the back of the throat while cycling.
+1
The feel of a stray bit of banana getting into my mouth
The moment just after you realise you've wiped dog sh*t off your glove, onto your face. And you have a good few days growth on your face for it to get really bedded in to. And you're at the furthest point from home.
Once jumped over a style, slipped, fell on my arse, got up, dusted myself off and continued on my way... then had the creeping realisation that what had just happened was:
Jumped over a style, slipped in dog shit, fell on my arse in the dog shit, got up by putting my hand in the dog shit, and 'dusted myself off' by wiping dog shit all over myself.
: Case in point - Disneyland Paris. Actually, the whole experience is worse than pain.Enforced piped 'music'.
High velocity fly to the back of the throat while cycling.
Definitely - makes me vomit, literally.
Putting on a cold wet sandy wetsuit at sunrise, in a car park.. in february.
Standing in shit barefoot. Getting splattered in dog, fox or cow shit from your wheels (fox shit is the worst).
Mr Woppit - MemberPossibly too yucky even for this forum. Involved a then girlfriend.
Use your imagination...
She didn't know that Steely Dan were named after a dildo?
🙂
I'm going for a memory from younger days - waking up on the floor at a party, reaching out for the can next to your head then only realising once you've taken a swig that it's been used as an ashtray.
-Pulling on wet kit.
Ahem.
Main thing for me is hearing bad music. Two in particular come to mind - Robbie Williams 'Candy' and Natasha Bedingfield 'These Words'. 2 songs that make me want to stab a hot knitting needle through my head to stop the sound.
Not because I'm a music snob (Rusty!) - they just revolt me. Like the smell of dog shit up your nose, but in your ears.
Neptune's kiss.
Anyone who hasn't experienced this, you're a lucky, lucky person.
You think I'm going to click play?? Utterly pointless post roper!! 😆
Andyb39
😆
Neverheard it called that before.
And you are right !!
You think I'm going to click play?? Utterly pointless post roper!!
Just sharing the love. 😀
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you......
Clove oil, I've come to the realisation that intense toothache is preferable to sticking clove oil in yer gob
Bad acid in a tent in the rain at Glasto 😯
lemonysam - Member
I'm going to nominate standing on a large slug in your bare feet. It's the slight unyielding bounce that does it.
A good nomination but having done the same (in the dark) to a large frog I'll up it to that.
I'll see your frog and raise you a massive rat. Back when all this were just fields, and I had a paper round, I delivered to a mate's house. He had the biggest cat I've ever seen. I swear it was half panther. It used to leave dead stuff on his drive, and one day I stepped on a massive dead rat. I could feel its bones crunch individually, can still feel/imagine it to this day.
Or, I once stepped on an upturned drawing pin, in bare feet. The point stuck in my heel. No pain at all, but I could feel the metal scraping on my heel bone as it went in.
And then I had to pull it out, which was the same but worse...
It used to leave dead stuff on his drive, and one day I stepped on a massive dead rat. I could feel its bones crunch individually, can still feel/imagine it to this day.
At least yours was dead when you stood on it. Mine squirmed...
One thing that springs to mind is the time I had to have an emergency chest drain...
There was no pain as such as I was whacked up to the eyeballs on morphine, but it was a really strange sensation of discomfort as the wriggled the tube through my intercostal muscles.
Another...
That stomach lurch when you realise that you've:
a) ****ed something up very badly indeed.
and
b) Done so in manner which ensures that everyone will know about it.
Another...That stomach lurch when you realise that you've:
a) **** something up very badly indeed.
and
b) Done so in manner which ensures that everyone will know about it.
The sensation is like when the camera zooms in on Roy Scheider in Jaws as the kid gets eaten on the beach.
Playground roundabouts after your fortieth birthday.
When walking into your (5 yr old) child's bedroom to see if she is getting ready for school, only to be shouted at, hit and told to go away.
That made me very sad this morning 🙁
(TBF she's just had an operation so we are cutting her some slack this week, but...)
first 2 weeks of fatherhood - emotional high combined with levels of sleep deprivation only previously encountered in guantanamo bay puts your head in a very strange place indeed
Biting into a raw chicken drumstick was rough. It was 'breaded' from memory so thought it was ready cooked. Teeth slicing through raw flesh was vile.
Other than that pulling a whitey or what RaveyDavey said, that sort of thing when you just want to die from sickness / brain unpleasantness
That moment when you realise you've lost something precious or expensive.
At 16 yrs old I went to London for the first time with a friend to see the Freddie Mercury Tribute concert and I lost the camera we had been taking pics with throughout our whole trip to london and at the gig, would love to have those pics now. It happened to me another time pushing my bike up Keppel Cove (Helvellyn) and I put my hand back to my vest pocket for my phone to find it missing. Absolutely gutted for about 20 mins when another lad came up behind me pushing his bike and says 'hey mate have you lost your phone?'
Wet socks on a cold day.
The bit where they inflate your lower intestine during a [s]probing[/s] sigmoidoscopy. Not painful, but feels mighty weird, and I fully expected to explode.
I once hit a slug with a piece of wood and the eggy shrapnel went into my mouth.
Bikini wax
Freezing your ass off in some middle of nowhere bit of Wales trying to get out of sodden biking kit into something warmer. And the sensation when feeling comes back to your fingers and toes when the car heating is on full . Mega pain!! Lol
Suffocation / Drowning ?
howsyourdad1, mmm, whiteys, I'd forgotten the shear misery they've put me though.
The worst is where I took one just at the top of a hill that has a lovely gravelly decent. Normally I flew down that, that day I freewheeled the whole way, my mates thought Id crashed I was so slow coming down. Then had to sit at the side of the road for half an hour desperate to hurl, before I finally did and felt instantly better.
Bloody horrible.
Plus one on cardamom seeds.
Can I nominate the burning smell when you have your vasectomy cauterised with a soldering iron?
Other than that pulling a whitey or what RaveyDavey said, that sort of thing when you just want to die from sickness / brain unpleasantness
I've only had a whitey once and it's not an experience I want to repeat. Also the comedown after Reading festival this year was pretty horrific, on it for 4 nights in a row with work on the Tuesday was probably not the best idea in hindsight. I could barely keep my eyes open haha
1. Drinking Gastrografin prior to a CT scan.
2. The 5 megaton, 20 litre poo/fart combo that follows.
I thought I'd turned inside out. Horrible.
Oh and having staples [s]ripped out[/s] removed after varicose vein ligation.
27 of the ****ers pulled out with a pair of bastard pliers.
At university we used to (prior to having a whitey) play ' cardomon pod surprise ' This involved having a house Sunday lunch together , usually with roast potatoes. A cardomon pod would be stuffed in one of the potatoes as the surprise. Great days ??
Oh yeah, a whitey
Big blowback on a joint and then Your stomach drops. Bleurgh
I don't actually know what some of these things are, and I'm afraid to ask....
Had an MRI the other day, cant describe the feeling when you get moved into the tube, very claustrophobic, had to close my eyes throughout.
Yes, I know I should man up.
When everything seems to go into slow motion just before a crash, you know you are going to crash, you know its going to hurt, and there is FA you can do about it.
Seasickness. When there is no respite, and nothing you can do about it.
Witnessing someone else being kicked in the gonads.
Pushing your finger through the bog paper you are currently wiping your arse with....
Chomping on a cardamon pod - puts me off the rest of the meal
That feeling when your foot slips on the dry pavement and you realise you just trod in a dog turd. And your wearing those trainers with a really complicated tread pattern.
Properly biting your tongue, when you feel the flesh of your tongue actually being chewed by your own teeth.
The feeling when you massively mess up and your head goes a bit woooaaahhhhh and you get that sinking, bum clenching feeling inside as you know you have to explain it to someone.
The vibration of a dentist drill going through your head.
Looking at certain patterns in nature really sets me off - sets my teeth on edge and make me feel queasy, but in a fascinated by how nasty it is kinda way. Recent ones were a video of that toad who's babies are born through the skin on it's back and it ends up with loads of cavities in it's back where they were. And a cross section through a babies skull showing where all the teeth are sitting. Bleurgh - oooooh, that's amazing - but nasty - Bleurgh - ooooh, that's amazing etc......
The waves of nausea and cold embrace of porcelain as you body tries to wretch out its own stomach lining are pretty bad.
But not as bad as the self loathing that comes with the knowledge you did this to yourself and you can't hold your drink like you could when you were twenty.
Chewing on cotton wool.....eruuuuurrgghhhbleeeuutrghhh
The waves of nausea and cold embrace of porcelain as you body tries to wretch out its own stomach lining are pretty bad.
combine that with your body simultaneously emptying the contents of your bowel, the hideous clash of smells filling your nostrils and the bowl you are holding is full...
The vibration of a dentist drill going through your head.
I quite like that
for me, I'd say near drowning was pretty damn awful.
no pain, just fear, helplessness and panic.
pain would be preferable.
Stress. That intense dizzying feeling that completely stops you functioning, turns you in to a ****, anti social, argumentative, short fused, and normally results in head in hands, close to tears with feelings of "What am I doing? I need a change" etc.
Either that or treading in dog poo, one of them.
EDIT:
Some people love dog poo though
combine that with your body simultaneously emptying the contents of your bowel, the hideous clash of smells filling your nostrils and the bowl you are holding is full...
Yep, once did that after drinking a load of red dubonnet (mum's drinks cupboard raid). Puked in the tiny sink whilst sat on the bog exploding out of the other end. The poor little sink couldn't hold it, and the bog was reminiscent of an abbatoir afterwards. 😳
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Looking at certain patterns in nature really sets me off - sets my teeth on edge and make me feel queasy, but in a fascinated by how nasty it is kinda way. Recent ones were a video of that toad who's babies are born through the skin on it's back and it ends up with loads of cavities in it's back where they were. And a cross section through a babies skull showing where all the teeth are sitting. Bleurgh - oooooh, that's amazing - but nasty - Bleurgh - ooooh, that's amazing etc......
Trypophobia?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trypophobia