Just been out with the gf and dog for a walk round the local suburban country park (one of a few on old colliery sites in these parts). Just starting to get dark. Halfway up the small hill (the old slag heap) there's a man standing in the middle of the path. Pretty normal lookng - short, middle-aged, maybe slightly overweight. Dark clothes, black leather jacket, but nothing out of place. Could have been plucked straight out of a working men's club.
He doesn't say anything to us or acknowledge our presence, he's just kind of loitering, as if waiting for something to happen.
At his feet there is, to the best of my recollection (I didn't have long to look):
-A board, maybe a foot square, painted(?) creamy yellow, with a thin black diagonal cross, some strange symbols and, I think, the words "this isn't a lemon."
-A glass beaker in the centre of the board with a large orange, or maybe a grapefruit, or possibly blood orange, which I think had been cut into.
-A red liquid - blood, or fake blood, or maybe blood orange juice (outside bet) on the fruit and in the beaker.
You can walk past that sort of thing without making some kind of comment. He's seen me clearly staring at it anyway. So I said to the guy, fairly jovially, "what on earth is that then?"
He replied fairly quietly, somewhat dismissively, as if I were odd for asking, "It's a demonstration."
I considered leaving it at that, but instead asked "a demonstration of what?"
He quietly, a bit gruffly, but not aggressively, again dismissively, said "on you go then" or words to that effect, and sort of gestured up the hill.
I looked at him quizzically, but I was clearly going to get no further so we just carried on, though I had every right to be there and any normal person would question what he was doing.
[b]Anyone got the first clue what was going on?[/b] Were you the strange man?
Our walk took us along the bottom of the hill a few minutes later, and I could see him stood in the same spot, silhouetted eerily against the darkening sky. He raised an arm, I think waving at me because he saw me watching him. I didn't wave back.
What the **** did I just see?
I believe it's called clickbait. Others call it spam.
The HTML List error is with us 🙂
Fair point on the clickbait. Not sure how it can be spam on a chat forum where you decide what topics you want to read?
Tried to edit the list error but even the corrected markup renders like this.
It wasn't a lemon though, was it?
I see nothing strange in describing an orange as not being a lemon.
You're not wrong. It was perfectly accurate.
He was making an effective public demonstration of its accuracy.
I deduce that, ten seconds before you'd arrived, he'd stuck it up his arse.
A lemon-entry, my dear thenorthwind. 😀
A very cunning and subliminal game of "The Travelling Lemon?"
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blimey that's big!
I'm glad I saw the guy just for that perchy.
(But it wasn't a chuffing lemon, OK?)
That's what he wanted you to think.
You were up against a pro.
And you lost.
(But it wasn't a chuffing lemon, OK?)
I've just Googled "What lemon for chuffing?" 😯
Was it a lemon party?
He'd ritually sacrificed an orange for heaven's sake! I'd believe anything he wanted me to!
What lemon for chuffing?
Sherbert apparently.
Well done perchy. Did you both set that line up 🙂
Bullshit baffles brains, obviously!
And what the chuff has happened to the formatting of this page?
I didn't realise the list markup had a closing tag. I edited and added them in but its made no difference.
I'm pleased at the use we've got out of the word 'chuff' on this thread.
NW - you could say you are chuffed.
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I bet it really said "this is not a melon"
... and he was looking to get a PB on that segment
or else he's mapping ley limes ?
Is it just me or is the formatting on this post all weird? The site is running weirdly slowly, loading funny. Whatever you saw it has broken the hamsters!
or else he's mapping ley limes ?
Oh, well done!
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He's taking the pith.
And it's not even shrove Tuesday.
Dyslexic ritual magician mistakes l for d?
Is the circus in town?[img] 
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Is it just me or is the formatting on this post all weird? The site is running weirdly slowly, loading funny. Whatever you saw it has broken the hamsters!
Try logging out, then back in to Citrics...
scaredypants giving perchy a run for his money.
Perhaps he's put a curse on the internet hamsters.
with some quality work by zzjabzz there
Dyslexic ritual magician
Maybe he was trying to summon Santa?
maybe it was a demonstration of how many people stop to question or report obviously suspicious/occult behavior.
bloody psychology students.
maybe he was with the masons (or illuminati) 😕
Google "this is not a lemon". There are bloody t-shirts with it on!
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Might look like a diagonal cross?
maybe he was with the masons (or illuminati)
Satsumilati?
or possibly blood orange, which I think had been cut into.
Not surprised he was furtive, I think that's a Seville offence?
[shoots self]
with some quality work by zzjabzz there
Too subtle for me first time round, just thought he'd misspelt Citrix, but now you've pointed it out... quality indeed.
maybe it was a demonstration of how many people stop to question or report obviously suspicious/occult behavior.
This seriously crossed my mind.
Day 17 didn't go quite as well.....
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Just be grapefruit that he didnt pomelo yu(zu). You could've been finger limed or worse, burgamo'd. And that would've been oroblanco.
No-one around to come to your lemonaid, either.
"Lemon entry dear Watson" 😯
Are we any closer to finding out what OP did actually vitamin-c?
Satsumilati?
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I was gonna go with 'illemonati'
Perhaps he was mentally 'not quite all there'? A couple of my oddest encounters have been with people who've seemed like that.