[Closed] weird things you do, even though they're weird

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Talk to farm animals I pass when I'm out riding.

That's priceless. I shall do the same, hence forth.

I'm quite wierd, so there must be things I do, too *dons thinking cap....*

i do the same.

most enjoyable when the male presenter is having a perve as the female talks important news

I talk to myself in my head when I'm on the bog or in the shower. Proper conversations about nothing in particular. Every now and again though I'll say the odd word out loud which can be a bit embarrassing if someone is in the trap next door at work.
I don't consider myself as mental, but then we would say that wouldn't we.
Nice one.....
Thanks.

wipe my bum standing up. I only found out it was wierd after 29 years, in a discussion with some mates a couple of months ago..

i reply to elfins e-mails 😉

My friend, a chippy, coaxes screws and hammers nails in with soft words.
"In you go now this won't hurt a bit"
"Just a little tap and you'll be all snug"

BONKERS!

Pull faces at myself in the mirror.

Find random marks on my windscreen and make them the crosshairs of my imaginary gun and 'shoot' other drivers/birds/pedestrians/cyclists 8)

wipe my bum standing up. I only found out it was wierd after 29 years, in a discussion with some mates a couple of months ago..

*I won't anymore - I will now forever feel uncomfortable standing to wipe.

Throw my shoes at the sky, Muslim-insult stylee, to protest about the weathe.

And lick my own eye-balls. Apparently not everyone can, and for this reason alone, its now somehow deemed as weird

Sometimes when I'm walking the dog and we're walking down a singletrack trail. I will often pretend i'm holding my handlebars and run down as if I was riding the trail. It's good fun.

Go into the garage to work on my bike without having a piss first.
I know as soon as the door shuts behind me I'm going to need one.
But I never bloody do it first.
I'm a idiot.

Spin my knife once in my fingers whenever I sit down to eat.
Have the car radio volume in even numbers or multiples of 5. My GF always puts it on to 13 and I have to change it.

Phone in to talksport?

(might not actually be me)

i talk to myself all the time. i had planned to pack it in before the kid's got old enough to notice but it never got sorted. ah well.

daddy you talking to yourself again. 😕

I always talk to sheep, say hello, pass the time of day.
But not to cows. That would just be odd.

Have the car radio volume in even numbers or multiples of 5. My GF always puts it on to 13 and I have to change it.

I do this too, no idea why

talking to animals as you ride past +1

Wow this thread is making me feel quite normal, though I've alway talked to animals (dog/cat/cows/sheep) & think nothing strange of that...

Lay out clothes on the bed (including undies) before dressing. Even I think it's odd, can't stop though.

I talk to my dogs a lot. More than a lot. All the time, often having quite in depth conversations with them. A lot of people would think that was strange.

I also use rifle/pistol cleaning as a form of meditation, but I again think there is nothing terribly unusual about that.

talking to animals as you ride past +1

+2 🙂

Rearranging coins into stacks according to size.

wipe my bum standing up. I only found out it was wierd after 29 years, in a discussion with some mates a couple of months ago..

Err, I am with you there. I still* think it is normal.

*I won't anymore - I will now forever feel uncomfortable standing to wipe.

Also, whenever I have a pack of sweets (wine gums, fruitella etc) I can't just have one and leave the rest. I HAVE to finish the pack. Doesn't matter if I have 2 packs, I will finish one asap but can leave the other for hours / days

I'm a stander too...never knew I was that weird!

LOOK AT ME MY NAMES DARCY AND I'M SO RICH I HAVE HEATED WING MIRRORS AND SPARE COINS TO STACK!

I also say hello - really enthusiastcally - to animals I happen across. Just being friendly....and weird at the same time.

When I enter the brew room at work I always start singing the same song. It's starting to piss me off now. It's like somebody presses PLAY>

I'm a stander too

So was I. I used to have an itchy arse too.

Love that joey: "You sound like you've swallowed the internet"

I have favourite parking spaces in every car park I use on a regular basis
Edit: And get really annoyed when they're taken

I'm writing a book on the art of weird.

It's called the great big book of nnnggggyaaaaaarrrrghgibberhnnnnnwombattesticulatoratory adventures in D minor.

I'm not even remotely weird though so I've got nothing to add to this thread.

[i]Rearranging coins into stacks according to size.[/i]

ohhh, I spin 50p/20p coins in the pub, weird, never the round ones

Emsz - Do you yawn loudly while spinning your coins on the table? And constantly look at your watch while checking your texts?

Have they not got the message yet? 😉

The single most weird thing I do is talk to strangers on an internet forum.

I also stack coins, but only when I'm on the phone.

I also doubt my Awesomeness occasionally, that's definitely weird.

Binners...*nods*, yeah, sometimes 😉

Apparently not...

Standing to wipe is wrong unless you squat, you need the cheeks open to get a good clean. I'm glad I've never met you, I'll bet you smell.

Right, that's enough poo wiping comparison thanks, some of us are trying to eat, OK?

I'll be you smell.

😯

Oh, that's a whole world of weird. 😛

EDIT: Ninja edit by toys19 😀

Stop modifying my words DD. You'll do anything to get at me, just jealous because I can pull off being rich without being despised.

I'm used to being despised at this stage.

Is this weird, or common:

I click on a window where I have work going on. "Right I'll get on with that"... look at the screen, then after about 2 seconds click back on the STW window.
Not only is it weird, but it bloody annoys me cos there is nothing interesting on here.

I post something then click on a window of work, click back here, think "oooh more posts", just to realise it was my post.

See.

one hand to spread the cheeks, the other to wipe, surely?

i am confused about this sitting business

Get naked more than I probably should.

I was competing with a starling this morning. In the whistling / strange bubbling noise stakes. That's a bit weird.

As there was no judges and no prize.

I talk to myself, stand up to wipe and every volume control in the house is set at an even number. Perfectly normal behaviour.

Internal monologue in my head a bit like in scrubs. Sometimes I imagine I'm being filmed and act more like the kind of person I'd like people to think that I am (though this has quite positive outcomes as I tend to become more confident and try harder at things).

I also speak to animals in their own language, mooing at cows, baaa'ing at sheep. I have quite long conversations with my cats too.

meehaja... I like to think you're a psychopath.

[i]I always talk to sheep, say hello, pass the time of day.
But not to cows. That would just be odd. [/i]

but do you do it in sheep ? 😳

I cycle to the top of glentress red, find the [i]Follow-Me[/i] soundtrack on my iPod, stick it on and then pedal my heart out down spooky wood as fast as I can imagining I'm Gee Atherton in the final scene shot in New Zealand with Stevie Smith closing in on me. Sometimes I try and work out where the helicopter is filming from so I can do my all best moves in prime shot. In my head it's awesome but in reality it's obviously very, very mediocre. 🙁

I do the internal monologue thingy as well!

when listening to music on the train or as a car passenger, I can only keep the rhythm if I can tap the time in between passing telegraph poles. If the beat falls on a telegraph pole, I have to miss the beat.

I count odd numbers two at a time as I climb stairs. 1, 3, 5, 7....

My foot jiggles as I fall asleep.

I have to take all the knives and forks that mrs deadly puts in the dishwasher the WRONG WAY and turn them upside down. And rearrange the plates/dishes/cups into an optimal packing arrangement.

(I have a feeling I may not be alone on this one)

you have a dishwasher?!

oh how the other half live!

[img] [/img]

Not done this for ages but we used to have a long shelf full of toiletries at my mum and dad's house and I would have to read out (just in my head thankfully) each bottle - ie 'Old Spice, Chanel, Denim...'

Then it moved on a notch and I would have to read each one out but punctuated by the first one in the line ie ' Old Spice, Old Spice, Chanel, Old Spice, Denim, Old Spice...'

Then I went through a long period of having to read out (in my head again) every registration plate I saw when driving. I stil find myself doing that one occasionally.

when I turn the TV volume up or down, I always have to land on an even or round number......don't know why

One thing I never do though is cup my hand over my arse when I fart then smell the results.

Nope, never, ever have I ever done that.

you have a dishwasher?!

oh how the other half live!

Mine works with the door open... bidet.

On registration plates, I try to make a word using the three letters - has to start with the first. I congratulate myself on anything containing ten letters or more.

@ philly:

[img] [/img]

I tend to have to tap stuff with my knuckles that I'm walking past - fence posts, lamp posts, office furniture - sometime if I'm feeling lively I'll give them a double tap 😕
.
doesn't everyone do stuff like this? is there anyone who doesn't have a little habit or minor episode of OCD? I'm sure everyone does, and those who don't are just afraid to admit it.

[i]I try to make a word using the three letters - has to start with the first[/i]

I do that. The ruder the better.

(My plate is JVJ.)

I walk along garden walls if they're less than 2ft off the ground.

My wife says I'm too old for that sort of activity.

Also, I was checking the video files of my commute this morning (probably, pretty weird in itself) and I heard myself say "Well that was shit, wasn't it?" to my bike(?) as I was about to lock it up. I don't remember saying that.

I can't get to sleep unless I am lying on the opposite side of the pillow to the one used the night before.

If I use a hotel or b&b, I'll carry on this, by deciding which side is the one I'd have slept on the previous night (e.g. if I slept on the patterned side at home, I'd look to sleep on the non-patterned side at the hotel/b&b)

I appreciate this is a little odd.

I describe my bum wiping position and method to complete strangers on a [s]scat[/s] mountain biking forum.

I walk along garden walls if they're less than 2ft off the ground.

I sometimes guess how many footsteps it will be to my destination, usually on the way home.
I change my gate if I feel like I've misapproximated.
As a sub-game, I pick a point in the near distance (manhole covers normally) and guess whether I'll step on it with my left or right foot. I get it right about 3/4s of the time.
.
walking is dull.

I really love the beauty of a virgin tub of margerine and so have to preserve its untouched surface for as long as I can.I just cannot understand people who just lunge the knife in anywhere, taking the contents sporadically and horror of horrors, take too much then scrape the excess back in, often leaving bits of toast/jam/marmite with it too...
To this end,I extract the margerine from one end, inserting the knife vertically with the tub upended and work my way along the tub until finished. It actually works better this way too as the knife is presented at such an angle so as to get a better load on its edge, rather than the unproffessional and shallow angle used by indiscriminate tub-divers....

Sadly, my girlfriend and her two kids don't share my view of buttery perfection and it pains me deeply...

[i]So do you just guess that they will be less than 2ft tall or do you actually measure them[/i]

just guess. I get dizzy if I pick a high one.

I think it started when my kids were toddlers and always wanted to walk along walls - I used to follow them. They've grown up and stopped, I haven't.

I sometimes pat the car on the dashboard when I arrive home after a particularly arduous journey (obv not when there's someone else in the car)

Have also been know to hug my MTBs/motorcycle when I get home after a holiday without them.

I also rub noses with the cat virtually every day 🙂

walking is dull

I have also done it whilst driving.

I have also done it whilst driving.

me too 😳

similar to turning your lights off at night on a pitch black road and seeing how far you dare drive...
but that's more stupidity than weirdness

rather than the unproffessional and shallow angle used by indiscriminate tub-divers....

Seeing somebody spell unprofessional wrong has a twisted beauty about it.

I play the Ukulele.

Sadly, my girlfriend and her two kids don't share my view of buttery perfection and it pains me deeply...

I play a game called moonbeams with my haloperidol.

Whenever I pick up a can of deodorant I flip it in the air like a cock[s]tail barman[/s]. It really annoys me too. Would never dream of doing with a real bottle of booze though

Seeing somebody spell unprofessional wrong has a twisted beauty about it.

Ha ha.....oops. you're right of course.

I used to do a little rhyme under my breath whenever I saw a lone magpie, after 25 or so years of doing it Mr Toast mocked me so relentlessly I stopped. So far I haven't experienced any chronically bad luck...so far.

I also chew paper, another habit I've had since I was a kid (although I was worse in my teens, actually used to swallow, would get through entire sheets of A4 in a day). I tend to idly rip little bits out of notebooks, and chomp away.

Also, whenever I have a pack of sweets (wine gums, fruitella etc) I can't just have one and leave the rest. I HAVE to finish the pack. Doesn't matter if I have 2 packs, I will finish one asap but can leave the other for hours / days