MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
We will be in touch
So, walking to work this morning listening to music at random and Dexy's Midnight Runners Jackie Wilson comes on and I immediately think of that classic Top of the Pops appearance many years ago.
The props department at the BBC must have misheard the instructions, clip below, look out for a very large poster in the background of a very famous (at the time) Scottish Darts player and definitely not Jackie Wilson.
This still makes me laugh now after nearly 30 years, anyone else got one?
Lego Death Star Canteen
"This is not a game of 'Who The **** Are You?'"
Spaced - can watch it over and over and there's a) there's all the bits I know make me laugh and b) there's always the odd gem I don't remember.
That and the Ali G in America talking about weed...
Some Like It Hot.
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Phoenix nights.
Dozens of simpsons/family guy quotes.
Tom & Jerry
Roadrunner
Gilligans Island
Brady Bunch
Top Cat
Plenty of scenes, too little time to remember them all.
"don't tell him, Pike!"
Many of the above & "Fork Handles" 😆 Making me smile as I write this.
Profanisaurus.
Robert Chantler's farts during the final half hour of the GCSE Maths exam in 1995. Hard plastic chairs, an acoustically sublime school hall, and 200 boys who'd nearly all finished the paper. I don't there's ever been so much muffled guffawing and poorly disguised shoulder shaking in one room since. Even Mr Roberts was amused. Mrs Brimicombe not so much. Parp.
Greig's piano concerto by Greig with him and him.
Though might have been the drunken nights at uni watching this that still makes me chuckle so much.
Wild? I was absolutely livid!
Wild? I was absolutely livid!
Also that.
Mickey's Monkey Spunk Moped.
Farts
During the first day at college, we were doing the indtroductory round in our group.
It came to the turn of the rather attractive blonde at the front. The lecturer asked the usual questions of name, where from, etc, and then came to the hobbbies/free time question.
"I ride horses." She replied.
"Anything else?" He asked.
After a short pause she responded, "No.... Just horses."
😆
Just the opening music is all it takes.
Planes, trains and automobiles, the "those aren't pillows".
Not the Nine O Clock News, the Young Ones and series 2 of Black Adder
Frau Blucher
My Dads mate Steve telling us how when he had got home from the pub his elderly neighbour had come round saying that his wife had fallen and couldn't get into bed. Drunk Steve popped round and lifted her into bed. Steve went home and jumped in his own bed. Was telling his own wife about it and she said, 'Was she heavy' to which Steve replied, 'Yes, she was a dead weight.' Then the penny dropped....!
and this
Some schoolfriends still discuss the antics of a prolific farter twenty eight years after the event. Apparently, the bassy bum blast reverberated so loudly against a wooden chair that the teacher in the next classroom stopped by to express his amazement.
At forty-two years old, it remains the high water mark of this particular individual's achievements to date.
Oh and Jockey Wilson says... 😆
Mighty boosh, want some Baileys?
StewartC, >shamelessly lifted from Mark Lamarr/Never mind the buzzcocks< Jockey Wilson's photo being mistakenly used as a backdrop was nothing when compared to a similar gaff when they returned to perform "Come on Eileen"...
The closing credits of All of Me with Steve Martin and Lily Tomlin dancing 😀
Wabbit season!
Who's on first?
Unless it has many vegetables
Many of the above & "Fork Handles" Making me smile as I write this.
You know there's a sequel, right?
"[i]Och, deed you smeel that?[/i]" eminating from one of the waitresses serving me and some mates in the Bridge of Ken Hotel one night after hitting the Stanes.
I think you had to be there but it still makes us laugh after all this time.
Joss Ackland's spunky backpack, Cake and the doctors 'your knee' scene from Jam.
Wild? I was absolutely livid!
Surely it's [b]mad[/b]?
As in:
[i]Are you mad?
Mad? I was livid![/i]
(Rowan Atkinson in the headmaster sketch - I forget where from)
Morph. Just genius, and the offspring likes it too.
Jonners and Aggers Test Match Special leg over incident.
Are you mad?Mad? I was livid!
(Rowan Atkinson in the headmaster sketch - I forget where from)
Gerald the gorilla was definitely wild.
Jonners and Aggers Test Match Special leg over incident.
and in a similar vein Roddy Forsyth has an problem with a pigeon while working for Radio Scotland
Matt Bianco (and I think Five Stars) appearance on an early Saturday morning kids show (the one after Noel Edmunds Swap Shop I think).
Caller: "Hi there, is that Matt Bianco"
Matt Bianco (in best giddy pop start voices): "Hi, yes it is!"
Caller: "You're all a bunch of w*****s"
Wild? I was absolutely livid!
This one:
The Rowan Atkinson line is from Gerald the Gorilla sketch on Not the Nine O'Clock News:
Prof. Timothy Fielding: I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Can I put this into some sort of perspective? When I caught Gerald in '68 he was completely wild.
Gerald, the Gorilla: Wild? I was absolutely livid!
Another one was Pamela Stephenson (as Janet Street Porter) interviewing Billy Connelly
This, plus all of Holy Grail.
This is also genius...
Vic Reeves' floating Lloyd Grossman on Masterchef
The Swedish Chemist from Not The Nine O'clock news never fails to raise a chuckle for me
Its not really something old but its something i return to a lot to make me laugh out loud
Gerald the gorilla was definitely wild.
Ahh okay then – this is the one I mean. Struggling to find out which one came first....
Headmaster: Well now, Mr. Perkins. It was good of you to come in. I realise that you're a busy man, but I didn't think this matter could be discussed over the electric telephone.
Mr Perkins: No. No, absolutely, Headmaster, I mean, if Tommy is in some sort of trouble, then I'd like to nip it in the bud.
Headmaster: Well, quite frankly, Tommy is in trouble. Recently his behaviour has left a great deal to be desired.
Mr Perkins: Dear.
Headmaster: He seems to take no interest in school life whatsoever. He refuses to muck in at the sports field. And it's weeks since any master has received any written work from him.
Mr Perkins: Oh, dear me.
Headmaster: Quite frankly, Mr Perkins, if he wasn't dead, I'd have him expelled.
Mr Perkins: I beg your pardon?
Headmaster: Yes, EXPELLED! If I wasn't making allowances for the fact that your son is dead, he'd be out on his ear!
Mr Perkins: You mean he's dead?
Headmaster: Yes... He's lying up there in sick bay now, stiff as a board and bright green, and this is, I fear, typical of his current attitude. You see, the boy has no sense of moderation: one moment he's flying around like a paper kite, and the next moment he's completely immovable. And beginning to smell.
Mr Perkins: Well, how did he die?!
Headmaster: Well, is that important?
Mr Perkins: Why, yes, I think so!
Headmaster: Well... Well... Well, it's all got to do with the library, you see. We've had a lot of trouble recently with boys taking out library books without library cards. Your son was caught, and I administered a beating, during which he died. But you'll be glad to know... You'll be glad to know that the ringleader was caught, so I don't think we'll be having any trouble with library discipline. You see, the library card system...
Mr Perkins: I'm sorry...
Headmaster: ...was...
Mr Perkins: You beat my son to death?
Headmaster: Yes, yes, so it would seem. Please, I'm not used to being interrupted. You see, the library card system was introduced...
Mr Perkins: Well, exactly what happened?
Headmaster: Well, apparently, boys were just slipping into the library and taking the books!
Mr Perkins: No, during the beating!
Headmaster: Oh, that? Well...well, one moment he was bending over, the next moment he was lying down, I mean, er...
Mr Perkins: Dead?
Headmaster: Mmm... deadish! ... Mr.Perkins, I find this morbid fascination with your son's death quite disturbing. What I'm talking about is his attitude! And quite frankly, I can see where he gets it from.
Mr Perkins: Well, it wasn't me that beat my son to death!
Headmaster: Well, that was perfectly obvious to me from the first day he arrived here. I wondered then, as I wonder now, if he might not have turned out a very different boy indeed if you had administrated a few fatal beatings earlier.
[b]Mr Perkins: Are you mad!?
Headmaster: I'm FURIOUS! In order to accommodate the funeral, I had to cancel afternoon school on Wednesday![/b]
Mr Perkins: This is preposterous!
Headmaster: Yes, it is. Or at least, it would be...if it were true.
Mr Perkins: ...What?
Headmaster: I've been joking, Mr Perkins. Pardon me, it's my strange academic sense of humour. I've been pulling your leg.
Mr Perkins: Oh, thank God!
Headmaster: I wouldn't cancel afternoon school to bury that little shit!
One of the best Simpsons clips EVER!
The April Fools edition (watch the whole thing):
EDIT: to add the best:
Jonners and Aggers Test Match Special leg over incident.
Reminds me of the Liz Hurley one I heard live.
Can't remember the exact words or had the mic but:
"Oh look there's Liz Hurley in the members enclosure."
"Have you come across her before?"
"No, but I'd like to..."
Then silence and you just about hear them s****ing.
Yes Minister — Why Britain Joined the European Union
Farting still gives me the giggles.
Probably my oldest brother seeming to take genuine offence at being stared at by a sheep around 20 years ago while we were climbing at Burbage. It still seems as silly as it did when it happened.
🙂
Superb. Was bored at work today - won't be tmrow.
Farting
Loads of great ones above that have me laughing.
Early Red Dwarf has to be another contender and I often think Holly got more of the prize lines
"I'm Holly the ship's computer with an IQ of 6000, the same IQ as 6000 PE teachers"
Rimmer: Step up to red alert.
Kryten: Sir, are you absolutely sure? It does mean changing the bulb.
Rimmer: There's always some excuse, isn't there?
TV - Father Ted, Black Books, Angry Boys, Flight of the Concords and Look Around You.
Internet - emails from an areshole, the American news anchor reading out the made up names of that Chinese flight crew and the Eddie Izzard Lego Deathstar Canteen posted on page one.
Books - timewaster letters and universally challenged.
Film - Weekend at Bernie's, The Big Lebowski and most of John Candy's output.
Music - Concords and Arrogant Worms
This still makes me laugh
And to follow a theme. A school football match at primary school that for some reason Mrs Evans was refereeing despite having no notion of the laws or conventions of the game. A goal was scored, the ball was returned to the centre spot and the other team kicked off without waiting for her signal. 'Stop! Stop! Come back. I haven't blown off yet!'
22 eleven year olds have never laughed so much
Microsoft Windows 🙂
Derek and Clive
South Park
Miranda, any episode..
I know it's really clichéd, but how ever many times I watch it, I can't help laughing at Del Boy falling through the bar hatch.
I know it's really clichéd, but how ever many times I watch it, I can't help laughing at Del Boy falling through the bar hatch
or trigger and his broom and his continual use of Dave when addressing Rodney.
This still makes me spill tea and spit biscuits:
Porridge. I dozed off laughing, watching it last night.. 🙂
paton - Member
www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkpS-yBj7gY
Yes Minister — Why Britain Joined the European Union
Yes Minister had many funny things to say about Europe (and quite accurate)
The Simpsons' finest moment.
Chortle?
What, with these feet?