Wild? I was absolutely livid!
This one:
The Rowan Atkinson line is from Gerald the Gorilla sketch on Not the Nine O'Clock News:
Prof. Timothy Fielding: I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Can I put this into some sort of perspective? When I caught Gerald in '68 he was completely wild.
Gerald, the Gorilla: Wild? I was absolutely livid!
Another one was Pamela Stephenson (as Janet Street Porter) interviewing Billy Connelly
This, plus all of Holy Grail.
This is also genius...
Vic Reeves' floating Lloyd Grossman on Masterchef
The Swedish Chemist from Not The Nine O'clock news never fails to raise a chuckle for me
Its not really something old but its something i return to a lot to make me laugh out loud
Gerald the gorilla was definitely wild.
Ahh okay then – this is the one I mean. Struggling to find out which one came first....
Headmaster: Well now, Mr. Perkins. It was good of you to come in. I realise that you're a busy man, but I didn't think this matter could be discussed over the electric telephone.
Mr Perkins: No. No, absolutely, Headmaster, I mean, if Tommy is in some sort of trouble, then I'd like to nip it in the bud.
Headmaster: Well, quite frankly, Tommy is in trouble. Recently his behaviour has left a great deal to be desired.
Mr Perkins: Dear.
Headmaster: He seems to take no interest in school life whatsoever. He refuses to muck in at the sports field. And it's weeks since any master has received any written work from him.
Mr Perkins: Oh, dear me.
Headmaster: Quite frankly, Mr Perkins, if he wasn't dead, I'd have him expelled.
Mr Perkins: I beg your pardon?
Headmaster: Yes, EXPELLED! If I wasn't making allowances for the fact that your son is dead, he'd be out on his ear!
Mr Perkins: You mean he's dead?
Headmaster: Yes... He's lying up there in sick bay now, stiff as a board and bright green, and this is, I fear, typical of his current attitude. You see, the boy has no sense of moderation: one moment he's flying around like a paper kite, and the next moment he's completely immovable. And beginning to smell.
Mr Perkins: Well, how did he die?!
Headmaster: Well, is that important?
Mr Perkins: Why, yes, I think so!
Headmaster: Well... Well... Well, it's all got to do with the library, you see. We've had a lot of trouble recently with boys taking out library books without library cards. Your son was caught, and I administered a beating, during which he died. But you'll be glad to know... You'll be glad to know that the ringleader was caught, so I don't think we'll be having any trouble with library discipline. You see, the library card system...
Mr Perkins: I'm sorry...
Headmaster: ...was...
Mr Perkins: You beat my son to death?
Headmaster: Yes, yes, so it would seem. Please, I'm not used to being interrupted. You see, the library card system was introduced...
Mr Perkins: Well, exactly what happened?
Headmaster: Well, apparently, boys were just slipping into the library and taking the books!
Mr Perkins: No, during the beating!
Headmaster: Oh, that? Well...well, one moment he was bending over, the next moment he was lying down, I mean, er...
Mr Perkins: Dead?
Headmaster: Mmm... deadish! ... Mr.Perkins, I find this morbid fascination with your son's death quite disturbing. What I'm talking about is his attitude! And quite frankly, I can see where he gets it from.
Mr Perkins: Well, it wasn't me that beat my son to death!
Headmaster: Well, that was perfectly obvious to me from the first day he arrived here. I wondered then, as I wonder now, if he might not have turned out a very different boy indeed if you had administrated a few fatal beatings earlier.
[b]Mr Perkins: Are you mad!?
Headmaster: I'm FURIOUS! In order to accommodate the funeral, I had to cancel afternoon school on Wednesday![/b]
Mr Perkins: This is preposterous!
Headmaster: Yes, it is. Or at least, it would be...if it were true.
Mr Perkins: ...What?
Headmaster: I've been joking, Mr Perkins. Pardon me, it's my strange academic sense of humour. I've been pulling your leg.
Mr Perkins: Oh, thank God!
Headmaster: I wouldn't cancel afternoon school to bury that little shit!
One of the best Simpsons clips EVER!
The April Fools edition (watch the whole thing):
EDIT: to add the best:
Jonners and Aggers Test Match Special leg over incident.
Reminds me of the Liz Hurley one I heard live.
Can't remember the exact words or had the mic but:
"Oh look there's Liz Hurley in the members enclosure."
"Have you come across her before?"
"No, but I'd like to..."
Then silence and you just about hear them s****ing.
Yes Minister — Why Britain Joined the European Union
Farting still gives me the giggles.
Probably my oldest brother seeming to take genuine offence at being stared at by a sheep around 20 years ago while we were climbing at Burbage. It still seems as silly as it did when it happened.
🙂
Superb. Was bored at work today - won't be tmrow.
Farting
Loads of great ones above that have me laughing.
Early Red Dwarf has to be another contender and I often think Holly got more of the prize lines
"I'm Holly the ship's computer with an IQ of 6000, the same IQ as 6000 PE teachers"
Rimmer: Step up to red alert.
Kryten: Sir, are you absolutely sure? It does mean changing the bulb.
Rimmer: There's always some excuse, isn't there?
TV - Father Ted, Black Books, Angry Boys, Flight of the Concords and Look Around You.
Internet - emails from an areshole, the American news anchor reading out the made up names of that Chinese flight crew and the Eddie Izzard Lego Deathstar Canteen posted on page one.
Books - timewaster letters and universally challenged.
Film - Weekend at Bernie's, The Big Lebowski and most of John Candy's output.
Music - Concords and Arrogant Worms
This still makes me laugh
And to follow a theme. A school football match at primary school that for some reason Mrs Evans was refereeing despite having no notion of the laws or conventions of the game. A goal was scored, the ball was returned to the centre spot and the other team kicked off without waiting for her signal. 'Stop! Stop! Come back. I haven't blown off yet!'
22 eleven year olds have never laughed so much
Microsoft Windows 🙂
Derek and Clive
South Park
Miranda, any episode..
I know it's really clichéd, but how ever many times I watch it, I can't help laughing at Del Boy falling through the bar hatch.
I know it's really clichéd, but how ever many times I watch it, I can't help laughing at Del Boy falling through the bar hatch
or trigger and his broom and his continual use of Dave when addressing Rodney.
This still makes me spill tea and spit biscuits:
Porridge. I dozed off laughing, watching it last night.. 🙂
paton - Member
www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkpS-yBj7gY
Yes Minister — Why Britain Joined the European Union
Yes Minister had many funny things to say about Europe (and quite accurate)
The Simpsons' finest moment.
Chortle?
What, with these feet?
So many from Father Ted.
Cougar - when I saw your comment but before the YouTube image loaded, I fully expected to see that scene. You have not disappointed.
Another one of my faves is the Fast Show sketch with Unlucky Alf getting a parrot and saying 'knowing my luck it won't talk or nothing'...
[b]Cu%t! Fu£k! Tw£t![/b]
🙂
Or Ming the Merciless doing the vacuuming at home on his day off (Peep Show)
Just finding the link for this and I'm giggling like a 5 year old -
Seeing as its December 1st ...
We watch this every year as part of the Christmas celebrations in this household.
Holy Sprog Christmas Nativity - Fast Show's Chanel 9
Oh-whoaah-oh! Oh, heth-eth-eth Beth-etheth-ethlehem.
Or Ming the Merciless doing the vacuuming at home on his day off (Peep Show)
Sorry, Big Train. My bad.
Not that many years, but this has got me s****ing again now...
turn the sound down if at work
When I was about 16 a group of us got ourselves into a constant situation where just looking at one another would make us burst out laughing – sometimes at the silliest ever things and often at very inopportune times (such as the time we were at a 6th Form induction day and listening to a talk from the head.
But the worst one was at my house – my mate had started me laughing again so I locked him in the porch whilst I had my lunch. I had the misfortune to look at him as I was drinking a glass of milk and saw him goose stepping up and down the porch – milk shot out of my mouth and nostrils and all over the kitchen and I was doubled over laughing so much my sides really were in pain.
33 years later and it still makes me laugh when I think about it.
[i]A fire at a Sea Parks[/i]
Beautifully written, brilliantly acted, hysterically funny scene 😆
