[Closed] Stag dos. Bloody daft priced

You are correct...

I guffawed at the invites to stag dos skiing and 'beefa.

That's a holiday, NOT a stag do...!

DrP

A couple of the groom's oldest mates are not minted but doing ok - families, mortgages etc but this just stops them even being able to entertain it.

I totted it up - you're looking at a £300 weekend easily, and that's not going mad with booze.

Spent a week in Verbier for a mates last year.

Hiking, climbing, Mountain biking and boozing with my best buds.

It was $$$. It was also bloody brilliant.

£300 is cheap for a stag!

A friend of mine recently commented on me not having a stag do - which I did, but clearly some folk don't consider a curry and a few beers worthy of the title of stag do!

I would rather a ride and a few pints in the local.
I do not get the spend more and total P*ss up culture.

£300 is cheap for a stag!

Curry, beers and whichever Star Wars film had just been released for me, with a couple of proper good mates.

Shame really, 15 years on and still never been paint balling or to a strip club ...... 😛

I would rather a ride and a few pints in the local.
I do not get the spend more and total P*ss up culture.

1st time was a mtb ride and bivi in mid Wales in the mide 90's . Last time was camping and walk in the north Wales hills. I decided what I wanted and those who wanted to play did.

The idea is that you do something which you won't really have the opportunity to do once you are married.

Really? Do some men expect to give up things like trips with male friends when they get married?

I'm fairly dull so mine was a walk across a hill to a pub and back then onto pub in town for the evening. Deliberately cheap.

I decided what I wanted and those who wanted to play did.

14 of us climbed the Old Man of Stoer for mine then pints in the Am Fuaran bar in Altandhu which some of the non climbers attended.

That's the thing ojom. I made mine deliberately cheap to include my mates (same ones in fact).

Mine was 2 days mtbing in Wales. Far more enjoyable than the actual marriage 8)

Like so many other things it's become expensive and commercialised. The industry (like the whole wedding industry) plays on our feelings that we should mark these life events with extravagant gestures and we justify them by saying its a special occasion or a one off.

I am with you Pook.

Curry and a few beers would suit me, may be a mtb ride during the day for those who wanted to give it a go.

I like to be able to get up the morning after a night out, not worrying if my head is going to fall off and explode.

Totally ridiculous. You are not wrong Pook.

Didn't go wild on mine but was still going to come in about £100 each so I paid for everyone. I didn't see why anyone should be too out of pocket for my wedding - being a guest is expensive enough.

Pook..we must be getting old and grumpy!!

I'll happily drop £300+ on something MYSELF, that I feel I wouldn't do after marriage (boy, was she worth it... the hospital weren't happy though.. 😉 ) but I wouldn't expect friends, wealthy or poor, to do the same...

DrP

Mine was curry, beers, nasty lap dancing bar.

Kept it traditional.

It's a stag do, not a quiet night down the local.

The thing is for the groom to look back at it fondly many years from now when he remembers how much his friends liked him, and proved it by dressing him as a woman, cable tying him to a lamp post and leaving his old chap exposed.

i'm having my stag in Norway it's 12 quid a pint whose round is it?

Isn't going climbing or riding a mountain bike just as selfish and still excluding some mates that don't/can't do that?

Op is not wrong.
Mine was a few pints in a pub.

he remembers how much his friends liked him

Like is measured in the amount of £ spent then?

The idea is that you do something which you won't really have the opportunity to do once you are married.

I would be reconsidering my impending marriage if I was going to be restricted like that - or reconsidering my attitude to life if it was me squeezing in one last naughty moment...

My purpose of my stag do was to spend time with some close pals and thank the, for thier friendship.

Don't get the 'get drunk, go to a strip club' thing at all, the mates make it not the venue!

All of my mates are now married so have been on a few stag do's (and one or two hen do's too 8) ) and they've ranged from a cheap night down the pub to expensive weekends away. One groom didn't want anything so the weekend before the wedding we took him down his local and just had a night in there, a cheap pub meal and a drink or two over two hours. As he and I are teetotal the drinking never got out of hand, still didn't stop the friends ripping him apart for the duration with stories 😀

The best one, by popular consensus though was where we all just went and stayed in a youth hostel in the Beacons for a weekend and went for a walk to some amazing waterfalls then a meal in a local pub. So relaxed it just flew by.

£100 on food and drink for a weekend. Are you staying in on the Saturday?

Like is measured in the amount of £ spent then?

Nope, and I didn't suggest that. Covering someone in swarfega and bird seed can be done for a surprisingly small sum of money.

Joking aside, the point here is that an effort is made to make it memorable, and that will most likely incur a cost. I agree that a weekend in Ibiza is costly, over the top and lazy thinking, but something more creative and personal may be a bit costly too. It's about balance

mine was just a few pints with old mates in our home town

Although I did have to travel back to the UK to do this and my home town is Bolton - so not exactly exotic in any sense

Mine was, like others a quiet affair. I never even had a formal best man such is the retarded nature of my friends circle/males in my family. So it was about as pared back as it could be. Still had a brilliant time. The best stag i went on was a bit pricier but involved a 'Wilderness Skills weekend' in the Cairngorms. It was excellent fun and a real laugh. Ex military guy teaching a group of 'lads' how to best use their wood, at night, in a forest. As it happens I'm sadly not mates with the groom any more, but his effort was perfect and I think it was only about £150 a head.

I have to say, I don't get the issue with £300 for a stag unless it's someone you don't like. The fact that it includes "including paintball, karting and zorb footy hotels + club entry spread over a full weekend" and so you're only paying for beer makes it a bargain in my eyes.

Yes, he could have just gone to the local but where's the fun in that? He can do that every weekend.

Plus, if you don't like it, don't go. Easy.

Really? Do some men expect to give up things like trips with male friends when they get married?

There is a trope
[quote=awful jokes thread]Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends?

Because he got married.

And it dates to a recognition that when a fella get married, his life changes as he needs to take on more responsibility and grow up a hit and so he is less able to take part in 'irresponsible' activities like getting drunk or visiting strip clubs, hence this kind of activity is seen as one last night of freedom.

I have to say, I don't get the issue with £300 for a stag unless it's someone you don't like. The fact that it includes "including paintball, karting and zorb footy hotels + club entry spread over a full weekend" and so you're only paying for beer makes it a bargain in my eyes.

Yes, he could have just gone to the local but where's the fun in that? He can do that every weekend.

Plus, if you don't like it, don't go. Easy.

I think this nails it. Personally I'd have to really like someone to afford that, but then I am a ****. I have turned down Ski trips before (I've never skied for starters) for a good mate of mine though as that was north of £500. He ended up having two stags... ridiculous.

Joking aside, the point here is that an effort is made to make it memorable

Well lots of people above seem to remember their 'cheap' stag do, so I still don't get why you have to spend hundreds on it.

Im of the less is more ilk....I basically didn't want a stag do at all! I was forced into a day at XScape in Castleford, which in fairness I enjoyed as id never tried skiing before, a curry and a few beers. This was plenty enough for me. I had enough to fork out already for the wedding without some overblown silly stag trip away.

What is a zorb footy hotel?

I would be reconsidering my impending marriage if I was going to be restricted like that -

So you don't think your social activities will change much once you are married?

I would rather a ride and a few pints in the local.
I do not get the spend more and total P*ss up culture.

The idea is that you do something which you won't really have the opportunity to do once you are married.

These will all go once he is married.

Edit. a mate just got back from a Birthday party (!) to Amsterdam, it was £8 per pint... 🙁

So you don't think your social activities will change much once you are married?

Mine didn't.

We had a HAG do ,hen /stag and went out for a Chinese with friends and lots of cider .My social life and my hobbies involve my wife as we always walk and cycle together

So you don't think your social activities will change much once you are married?
[b]Mine didn't[/b]

That's a shame

So you don't think your social activities will change much once you are married?

Married, no, children maybe.

So you don't think your social activities will change much once you are married?

They didn't. Have most people not lived together for ages before marrying these days? If you expect a partner to radically change their activities or behaviour on marriage then you're probably setting yourself up for a fall.

Mine was an afternoon doing stuff and an evening that was curry and beers. Some folk did everything, some just came for food and drinks. One lad just joined for the meal then went home again, total cost sub-£20. Attending absolutely everything isn't mandatory, you can just show your face for an hour and it'll be appreciated.

That's a shame

Outstanding comeback.

They didn't. Have most people not lived together for ages before marrying these days? If you expect a partner to radically change their activities or behaviour on marriage then you're probably setting yourself up for a fall.

In which case you were essentially married already. Did your social life change after you moved in together?

richmars - Member
Joking aside, the point here is that an effort is made to make it memorable
Well lots of people above seem to remember their 'cheap' stag do, so I still don't get why you have to spend hundreds on it.

Nice bit of selective quoting there

In which case you were essentially married already. Did your social life change after you moved in together?

No.

I guess for some people they do quite often go for a night at the local with their mates, or for dinner etc, so to do something memorable they need to do something unusual, hence ibiza or zorbing or T bagging or whatever

I had enough to fork out already for the wedding without some overblown silly stag trip away.

Why would the stag have to pay anything for the stag do? Their costs are split between everyone else.

In which case you were essentially married already. Did your social life change after you moved in together?
[b]No.[/b]

That's a shame

In which case you were essentially married already. Did your social life change after you moved in together?

That's a different point from the one you initially made about marriage and quite a trivial one, of course your social life changes when you meet someone.

I'm not in a great place to comment on stag do costs. For mine, 12 of us went to the LeMans 24 hour race in France (most of us live in a Bristol - so a decent time travelling).

Less cost in drinking than the average stag do as most if it was done in a field by the tents / by the race track and we bought most of the drinks in the supermarche.

Probably was a £250 all in sort of cost - but it was epic. Even the few less petrolhead mates enjoyed it because it was so laid back and mellow and they like camping anyway and it was mostly warm and sunny.

Well lots of people above seem to remember their 'cheap' stag do, so I still don't get why you have to spend hundreds on it.

Indeed, my wife still has the photos of her hand mark on our naked backsides where she slapped us all.

Not quite sure why we thought it'd be a good idea to go outside and moon at the moon, but it seems we did and she has the proof........

That's a different point from the one you initially made about marriage and quite a trivial one, of course your social life changes when you meet someone.

Well,for most

But I was talking about more than just meeting someone, I was talking about making a commitment to someone,by agreeing to make your lives together. Whether that is socially signified by marriage or not.

Having a stag do if you are already living together is a bit meaningless

I personally fall in the side of just go out for a good meal, drinks and a dodgy tittie bar stag do - worked for me and my brother's do's.

Brother in law wanted to go to Amsterdam for a weekend. Cost a fortune.

Both were equally memorable ... esp regarding bananas in amsterdam .... :-/

So to conclude:

Spend what you like on your stag do.
Some people change their social life.
Many others don't change their social life.

Fascinating.

Just been discussing this, i was invited to mate's stag do, when i say mate, i've met him 6-7 times and our kids go to same school and we both like a decent beer.
His Stag do is a weekend in Bournemouth with the usual clubs, strip bars, "sports" etc, they want a deposit of £200 to secure a place, then there will be additional charges for the activities, plus travel from East Anglia to South Coast, drinks, hotel etc.

Thankfully it is same weekend as my wife's birthday, so i said so on the Whatsapp group that they had set up, that i was sorry but i couldn't go, i'd stick £50 in kitty for stags drinks and i'd take him up for drinks another time, which i thought was fair? Cue a whole raft of messages about how my wife has me by the balls, was i man or a mouse etc from a group of blokes of whom i've not met 90% of them!!

I'm glad wife's birthday clashes, despite having been both a rugby lad and a soldier for a large part of my life, i still hate the whole strip club/crap club/warm beer and jeering thing.

My stag do was basically a pub crawl by canadian canoe, had a great time, went to some great pubs with some good friends and i enjoyed it, instead of feeling like i had to pretend to be a "lad" all weekend.

The idea is that you do something which you won't really have the opportunity to do once you are married.

So to conclude:

Spend what you like on your stag do.
Some people change their social life.
Many others don't change their social life.

Fascinating.

Excellent, should do this for all threads! But only when concluding.

😀 @alexsimon

I had to turn one down this year, several days on the lash in Europe, it sounds bloody brilliant but I'm too old and poor.

Bit gutted tbh but if the rest of the lads can afford it and keep up, then good luck to them.

Might have to think about this myself next year. First time round had a quiet dinner with a few mates, which was a bit of a fail on the part of the Best Man...

However - going on a mates stag in a few months... to New York. £900 before we eat and drink 😯 Should be good...

@Alexsimon.
After that, watch a terrible but 'manly' war type film too. Rambo or something.

That's what I'd do...

DrP

I went to one similar to the initial post a few years back, although it was karting, airsoft/bb stuff and a casino. Cost a similar amount, good fun weekend, none of which stuff I'd normally do.

For mine I dragged all my mates camping in the Lakes for a weekend, in a terrible 12 man teepee tent we got from Argos for next to nothing. The weather was brutal, lots of memories, whether they like it or not. Even managed to drag them all out there for the subsequent 3 or so years before they broke and refused to come anymore 🙂

Best stag do I ever went to was 20 or so cycling mates of the stag doing a pub crawl on bikes. Highlights include riding at full speed into a bouncy castle and seeing who flipped the furthest, arriving at one of the pubs to be told we were not muddy enough so a vodka chaser became mandatory and a decent curry at the end. Simple pleasures made memorable by the people there.

I don't know if it was the price, the gradient or the racing that put people off mine.

6 of us raced Enduro2. It was bloody marvelous.

As to did my social activities change after i got married? Well, there's 8 of us off to Davos this year 😀

Bargain price if good mate. If a bit iffy about 'em just say no.

My stag was a brewery tour at Hawkshead, beers in the beer hall, curry at Starlys then pub crawl round Windermere and bowness. Night in the YHA. Didn't want any more than that and everyone seemed to have a good time.

I've heard it's quite standard to have one stag do abroad followed by a UK one for those that can't afford the trip.

So you don't think your social activities will change much once you are married?

Everyone's ideas of what & why is a Stag Do vary. Life rich tapestry of shite and all that. I wanted to gather most of my mates in a location for a weekend of share experiences and talking bollox. It was great. They are the ones who will support me through difficult times in the future and enjoy the great times to come. Any idea that this was my last hurrah before marriage would have had me running for the hills instead of walking down the aisle.

For another POV - My stag we rode bikes on one day and paintball on the other. Some of my friends/relatives went on a road ride instead of joining us on the MTBs, they had a great time and contributed to the weekend. An e-bike would have been a great leveller to help my little bro join us on the MTBs, but I don't think you could hire them at Grizedale either then or now.

I believe the costs were also massaged to make it affordable for the student/s.

scud - sounds like you've dodged a bullet there. Reckon it'll be a load of middle aged frustrated guys having their one weekend off a year 'avin' it laaaaaaarge.

Just helping to organise one now. Saturday afternoon shooting clays then into London for curry and drinks. We may find a club afterwards.

My own was a very quiet affair; curry and beers with a few close mates. My life only really changed after kids came along, the days of all night benders and being on the 'pull' didn't survive much past university as my first job was shift work and I had a mortgage/bills to pay.

Turned one down this year because I'm broke. And that was before I found out it was going to be £250 for a weekend in Macclesfield including Hooters, a stripper for the groom and a white water rafting session (in November.....).

Much as I'd enjoy a weekend with mates and beer, the groom wasn't even the strippers'n'boobs type!

I had an invitation to a 5-day Stag in Vegas for... £2k. Needless to say, I have decided not to go to that one!!!!!!!

I think there's an unfair amount of pressure on the Best Man, which might result in 'bells and whistles' instead of 'curry and pints'.

Mine went out of his way and got twelve of my best mates up to a snowsports and music festival in Aviemore. It was awesome, but I do feel bad about how much it must have cost them all!

I just make a point of being a fully involved invitee at any stag-do I've been invited to since, be ready with the cash up front and don't drag feet or take ages to respond to emails...

I am organising one at the moment. I talked to the groom and worked out what he wanted from the weekend, we have decided on a rugby match (London Irish vs London Scots), beers and a curry. He wanted to keep the costs down, and I reckon most people are happy enough, there will be 24 of us, if it had been a weekend on poland etc I reckon half that number would have been able to attend! A far as I am concerned it gives all the men who will be attending the wedding the chance to have a common experience to chat about come the big day.

I'm sharing best man duties for a friend in the summer, yet to decide on stag do, but don't think it will be too extravagant, I just don't think these really OTT trips are worth it.

Most I've been on have been 2 nights in a UK city, Friday and Saturday, with some sort of activities on the Saturday and both nights on the beer. Even if just doing that though, I've always been the wrong side of £300.

Last year I went to Munich for one, same sort of capers as above, zorb football, beer bike tour, ate lots of fatty pork products and salty bready stuff. Was definitely over £500, I don't want to add it up properly, but that included getting charged 60 Euro to be able leave a bar we popped into to have a piss by some scary Romanians.

I have to say though, I've enjoyed all of them and would regret missing a good mate's stag do, money comes and goes, your mates are your mates, nice to share the memories, even if some are never to be spoken of!

I went on one to Majorca last year, weekend which was actualyl a good laugh. Not many of us but all mates who have been dispersed around the world so 2 nights and days of sitting in the sun driking beer and talking pish was good. Did Pasha one night and Magaluf the next which for 13 40 somethings was like a minefield - as a parent you despair! Wouldnt want to do it every year mind.

While we're on stag do's, the opening scene of this film is genius.
[img] [/img]