If you see someone pushing a shitload of trolleys don't stop and stand in front of them in dumb amazement and ask if you can have one, as they have considerable momentum and no brakes. Also, don't assume cos someone works in the supermarket they know where your ****ing special sauce is. Also, if you are a bit miffed at the person banging stuff through a checkout too fast, consider the fact they have a target they are required to meet. In our store it is 20 items per minute, in aldi it is 30. If you are not inpressed, ask to speak to a manager. Checkout people love it when customers get arsey. HTH.
I got married so I don't have to do this shit.
i love it when they say "do you need help with packing " i say "no she will be right " and then look for ice cube bags while the wife packs ?
#real man
It's hilarious the comedy gold people think they say to checkout staff, when in reality it's about the 30th time you heard that crazy quip today. Ha ha very good, very original. You read the mail sir, very interesting, and your diet is apalling if I may say so. Some of the checkout bunch I work with are seasoned worldly pros and some are very intelligent young graduates, and many would slam dunk your general STW bod in a second in Real Life!
I take a route that starts with the heaviest items (booze) and ends with the lightest ones (croissants, bread etc) so that none of my stuff gets damaged.
Nothing worse than squashed plums, for example.
Tough shift Kevevs?
All supermarkets should be required to employ trolley mechanics. The things never go in a bloody straight line.
The shopper in front not being ready to pay is annoying as hell.
The person in front continuing the conversation with the check out staff once paid and keeping everyone waiting is also annoying.
Blocking aisles by leaving the trolley in the middle is annoying....move to the side.
Old people in general should be taken outside and shot.
As others have done, i amuse myself by putting items in other's shopping.
Last thing, I know what I'm going to buy when I go to the supermarket and I presume most other people do too?....therefore I go straight to what I want and use the overhead signs, the idea being to spend as little time there as possible....yet a huge number of people seem to collect a trolley at the entrance and slowly cruise up and down each aisle (both sides naturally) and look at every bloody product!....like its a nice day out or something?....don't they have homes to go to?....better things to do with their time?....they are the human equivalent of sheep.
Blocking aisles by leaving the trolley in the middle is annoying....move to the side.
Or more annoying - when women (and it is only women) go shopping with their friends, and they have a trolley each, bringing the entire supermarket to a standstill.
[url= http://yougottobekidding.wordpress.com/2010/02/11/more-wal-martians/ ]Wallmartians[/url]
If only our shops were this entertaining...
You can have fun though, my favourite trick is to casually collect the apparently abandoned trolley and move it into the next aisle. Double back quickly and you're treated to the several stages of the imbecile, first bemusement as they can't locate it, followed by increasing panic then utter bafflement when it appears in the previous aisle. Extra comedy points if the dost mare has left her handbag in the trolley!
The major rule is dont use tesco.
Checkout people who talk too much, i always seem to get the one telling me their lifes story.
Aldi know how to charm money out of you, 18" long drill set you'll never use sir only £5! Or you end up with "i went in for apples and ham, ended up with screwdriver set and welder. Genius!
[i]You can have fun though, my favourite trick is to casually collect the apparently abandoned trolley and move it into the next aisle[/i]
Do you leave your own trolley whilst you do this?
Why don't those superior being on here complaining about how inept everyone else is at going to the supermarket shop online? It's the modern way, if you were as intelligent and organised as you appear to be then that's what you shod be doing. Only idiots still go to physical stores to do their weekly shopping.
Where do you think all the zombie films come from?
Shoppers= zombies
Wallmartians
If only our shops were this entertaining...
I'm just loving the black bars they put across the eyes of the people with distinctive tattoos and hairstyles, so that you can't identify them.
Or more annoying - when women (and it is only women) go shopping with their friends
its not [i]only[/i] women
And this thread is why I do my shopping online!
I write a list, go in, get the things in order of my list, which isn't necessarily the order of the shop, get stuff, go to the tills and pay.
Edit: my wife does the big shop online. I'm more like a specialist milk/loo roll assault unit.
Trolleys aren't for pushing, they're for riding. Mon, people.
Back from Morrisons. Open from 7am on a saturday morning.
Stoner Jrs up from 5am. Far too early for the proles to clog the aisles. In, out, bishbashbosh. Fresh croissants for breakfast.
And Thornton choccies on special....
Back from Morrisons. Open from 7am on a saturday morning.
Surely it's worth waiting until 8am for Waitrose though?
Home shopping, so I don't have to mix with you plebs
Trolleys aren't for pushing, they're for riding
This is correct.
Absolute classics there, so funny and observant.
anyone else a lot of supermarkets make you go clockwise round them, going anti clockwise when in results in you hitting a wall.
£3.50 for the shopping to be delivered is the best £3.50 we spend every month!
i can't believe this has'nt been said already.. but self service checkouts, surely there should be a pre-requisite that you've got to be at least mildly intelligent before you are allowed to use one. i mean, if you have to spend 10 minutes looking for a barcode, seroiously, should you be on one..? and people who scan, pay then bag, are you really that stupid? and finally if you then don't know where the slot is for your credit card you should be banned for life.
oh, and people who when asked if they want their bags packed for them and say yes!
and also the idiots who stand watching the cashier scan there stuff and wait for the total before, this one always gets me, starting to rummage through their bags for their purse, then another rummage then to find cash or cards.
cornwall specific one... flippin tourists mooching around, dawdling, during peak 5pm shopping hour when all us locals want to do is grab tea and get home.
Real men dont buy conditioner, tofu,humus, yogurt, or vegetarian foods,
As a long haired vegetarian, that's me screwed.
Trolleys aren't for pushing, they're for riding
Caveat: the small trolleys have a different centre of gravity, as I once found to my cost in the carpark of Cardiff's Tesco Extra; built up speed across the carpark, jumped up holding the trolley handle and locked my arms out, and the front of the cart squirted out and up in the air, depositing me full length flat on my face to the cheers of about two dozen Welshmen. Graceful.
As a long haired vegetarian, that's me screwed.
As a long haired vegetarian being screwed must come as a bit of a novelty 😉
I think a lot of ****s on here have ****ing way to much time on their hands and **** themselves up over thinking shit. This is a pushbike forum. Away and ****ing ride yer bike and stop posting pish on here. Fuds.
Not wishing to upset you further but I think you'll find its a chat forum to talk about non bike related pish. Now who's the fud.
I think a lot of * on here have * way to much time on their hands and * themselves up over thinking shit. This is a pushbike forum. Away and * ride yer bike and stop posting pish on here. Fuds.
Whay aren't [b]you[/b] riding [b]your[/b] bike?
Oh!... A pushbike forum la de dah
Supermarkets have all walks of life using them.
Some patience needs to be exercised, unless the person using the self service tills has a trolley full of stuff.
These people need shooting.
Awesome. I'm away out on my bike now.
if you like looking at bums go with the flow, if you like looking at boobs shop against the flow
I really wish I hadn't read that before going to Sainsbury's.
Ya fuds.
It's good to see those that take themselves too seriously, aren't being taken so!
[img] 
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I really wish I hadn't read that before going to Sainsbury's.
I've just come back from Asda, there are some boobs I wish I hadn't seen. 😕
As a long haired vegetarian being screwed must come as a bit of a novelty
Bastard.
(-:
supermarket rules? how about making them stock english f^$!ing apples in season? pay a fair price for milk to the farmer? not sell strawberries in ba$7ard december from the other side of the £u(+ing world? Grrr.
I like strawberries, why shouldn't I be able to buy them in December 😐
from the other side of the £u(+ing world?
what about all the cute polar bears?[img][/img]
Kids that are more than big enough to walk in the bloody trolley!!! You idiots!!! I want to put my food in there and not where you're flaming kids dog crap ridden feet have been!!
Spud = fun spoiler.
I went with the flow, then round in circles 😯
IMO the biggest rule that should be enforced is that if you can't keep your disgusting brood under some sort of control, don't bring them to the ****ing supermarket. Or better still, stop breeding.
