[Closed] Road rage/car horn - can't help myself

If it helps, I don't think we beep enough here. Maybe if we did it more it wouldn't get the crazy reaction.

Are you sure it's just the driving that's winding you up - take a look at the rest of your life too and see what you can do to ease it all

As you say, you could well end up being very sorry for being confrontational

Usually, if someone has done something stupid or dangerous, it means you have to take.evasive action or respond quickly. If you have to take evasive action or respond quickly, then you really need both hands for driving. If you have a spare hand and spare concentration to hit the horn, then the manoeuvre probably wasn't that dangerous

nickewen

Anyone left the red mist/road rage mindset behind and what was the turning point? Also - can car horns run out?

It depends what I'm driving/riding but generally it happens less and less as I get older. When I used to own an old hilux with big tyres it went slow and I rarely got any sense of "rage". Saying that, no one ever cut me up or did anything naughty around that thing.

In something small or fast it seems to be elevated somewhat. A bicycle being the ultimate in that regard. I sometimes find it very easy to lose my shit with drivers when I'm on one of those things.

My wife is maimed from a Transit going into the back of our car years ago and tailgaters gave me red mist in a way that kinda worried me sometimes.

I have had my collar felt in regard to expressing my pugilistic rage (Raffles ref.) and have realised that I'm then the loser. Better to be calm and really show how you feel.

Example: bloke followed me so closely for several miles of A road that I couldn't see his bonnet in the rear view. I ignored him best I could and concentrated on the road in front. When we got to a small roundabout I stopped, opened his door, took his keys out and chucked them over the hedge. Told him the error of his ways and that he was lucky I was reformed, then I drove away, whistling.

Cheers for the replies all. In terms of the rest of my life I'm very happy, easy going and don't do confrontation.. I will caveat that by agreeing with Jimjam! I do lose my shit on the bicycle sometimes mainly (I think) because I know the consequences are lethal in many cases. Only last week I had a lass in a corsa brake check me several times as I tried to keep up with traffic through a set of roadwork traffic lights (to keep the flow) after she'd already close passed me earlier. She then thought it'd be awesome to show me th raw power of her piece of shit 1 litre car by horsing off to a red light. She got the hairdryer treatment

Heavy bag gloves and a bag.

You need a louder horn..

Sorry to hear about your wife and the rear shunt Lazlo, that's horrendous. Tailgaters are another of my pet hates. Well played with the keys/hedge move! I would have LOVED to see that.

Haha I have recently put a bag up in the garage a dug out my old bag gloves! And yes I think the loud horn is an excellent idea. Or maybe a comedy "fail" type horn?!

I installed a klaxon (awooooogaaaaa) horn in my old van.
Do it- it will definitely stop you tooting in anger, as it just made people smile.
Just make sure you swap it back at MOT time.

It's something I also think about, driving standards and courtesy are pants. However like you Ive slowly realised that if they're nobby enough to do what they've done hitting the horn won't have the desired effect, what we really want in that situation is a grovelling apology and that isn't going to happen, instead of getting satisfaction from using the horn you'll get even more wound up. I also feel the duty to show people the error of their ways but again have realised my intervention will only make things worse. I'm trying with some succes to modify my behaviour, think superior thoughts and let I go having realised there is a good chunk of society that are really selfish ********. Other thing to remember is actually most drivers are fine, how many vehicles do you pass daily who give you no issues.

Only time for the horn is if someone is drifting into your lane or manouvering without looking.

Bottom line is only you can change but it feels like you've done the hardest bit and realised the change lies with you, now just work on it.

I use my horn fairly regularly - it's there in the centre of your wheel right infront of you for a reason. To warn people of your presence or danger etc.

Here in Italy, horns are used regularly, cars will hoot at cyclists to warn them that there isxa car behind, nothing aggressive.. Italians do park anywhere. But if you are hoggong the motorway lanes then god help you

I have recently become calmer with these sort of incidents. A few months back a gentleman in a car beeped me and gesticulated angrily because I had the audacity to be stood in a keep clear box waiting to cross the road. There was just about room for one car next to me, three cars from a red light. He wasn't there when I originally stepped out

He proceeded to drive around the back of me, missing my leg by an inch or so. I gave him the classic V and he then wound down his window and started having a go. It was fine until he came out with "you don't pay road tax, you shouldn't be in the road". I've grown used to people trying to kill me when I'm on the bike, but I thought I was still safe walking. Needless to say I completely lost my shit, which I shouldn't have done

He got out of the car and I told him to get back in. After some more harsh words from both of us I began to walk off. He said something else, honestly can't remember what, but it really made me angry. I turned and kicked the hell out of the back of his car. It was either the car or him. Long story short I called the police when I got home because I felt terrible about the whole thing. Ended up paying for the damage and it was dealt with as a civil matter.

Made me think about stopping and calming down before reacting. Seems to have worked so far. My actions were foolish and ended up spoiling two people evenings. I just hope he learned a valuable lesson too.

[b]I'm very happy, easy going and don't do confrontation.. [/b]

Road rage/car horn - can't help myself

I feel a responsibility to at the very least beep at them and if they're within earshot let them know what they've done wrong

Without even thinking I beep at them.

I've lost it by this point and I'm trying to get out my car and my GF is NOT happy and stops me.

If my lass wasn't there I'd probably have either been chinned or got done for chinning someone else.

😀

i have honestly never sounded my horn in anger, ive tooted if someone in front hasnt seen the light turn green, or ive spotted someone i know but thats it.

i find it quite funny when someone gets the rage towards me, i just smile and wave, tens to wind them up more! i almost feel embarrassed for them.

as an aside, ive only ever had people raging when im in the car, never ever when im in my white van! folk are infinitely more tolerant...?

In the car park, was there room to just drive around the stationary car?

Were you annoyed because he was holding you up? If so, you cause yourself more of a delay by hanging around to argue than by just getting around the obstruction and carrying on with you journey. If you don't care about the delay then why are you angry?

Is it more that you get annoyed when you see people doing driving "wrong"? Again, you need to think about it. People doing silly things while driving makes you angry. Why? Because it's dangerous and it causes delays? You're making both of those things worse by reacting in the way you do.

practice acceptance, then you'll just laugh which is much better for you, your health and anyone sharing the car with you.
No amount of 'rage' is going to change the behavior of anyone, it's about the most futile waste of energy I can think of, and life is way too short to spend it angry at strangers however stupid they are.

I generally only beep when some idiot drifts across lanes on a motorway or cuts across them on a roundabout (as they're alongside me in both circumstances). I do gesticulate a lot though at the general stupidity of most drivers and get more wound up than I should do...

I regularly horn to wake up pillocks at traffic lights staring into phones. In general though driving is an absolute burden and it brings out the worst in me probably the only time I really get wound up.

Roll a fat one? It seems to work for some on STW. 😉

Beep when people are drifting or being vacant, couldn't care less if the are being morons and not really affecting me. Tail gaters can just stay behind me and get wound up (can understand the poster aboves reaction considering the circumstances though).
I just enjoy winding people up when they get stroppy over nothing, pulled in front of someone at the petrol station to fill up, he got all passive aggressive in his car because a van had blocked his exit, stupid people so i just take the view it has shortened their life a little so less time for me to put up with them

Don't get mad in the car, why would I I'm in a big metal box plus it's all being recorded on the dash cam.

On the road bike however I do struggle not to say something, it's hard not too when they've just used their 1.5/2 ton killing machine against you (particularly when it's actually on purpose, thankfully police around). But I have found a solution to that, a pollution mask! I can full on shout at the top of my lungs and no one can hear what I've just said. 🙂

i was indicating trying to merge into slow moving traffic and the **** in the lorry behind wasn't slowing down. once i finally made it into the slow lane i gave him a ****er signal. resulting stand up shouting match with a lorry driver on an off-ramp - yeah thats me. no not anymore.

in my 20 mile commute i see all sorts of crazy shit.. not just middle lane hoggers, but 3rd lane hoggers. people texting, talking on their phones, doing makeup.. obviously hungover/still intoxicated.. so involved in singing their heart out their eyes are closed..

i've learned chill, take my time. i don't have time pressures to be at work on the dot and its better for fuel economy too 🙂

I avoid diving as much as I can cos I get wound up by everything.
It's not the "rest of my life" or any of that crap, it's just people's driving is so arrogant, ignorant, incompetent, stupid, discourteous and annoying!
Indicating particularly! It's got to be one of the SIMPLEST (sorry Cougar) things in the world - I'm going [i]this[/i] way, I've got a little stick next to my little finger, I just push it. There's nothing to it, yet.. 1 in 5, maybe less drivers are capable/bothered to do it, particularly on roundabouts.
Anyway, I no longer have to drive to work, so that's good.
Even if you chill and take your time, someone will take that as you're waiting for them to cut you up, tailgate or generally be a ****er.

@ OP.
Thank you!
I have 3 people just pull out on me on the school run this morning, which makes me think there was some sort of cloaking device was engaged (its a bright blue renault scenic FFS). Sent me into a bit of a rage, such that the other half start giving me grief for being angry!

I stopped somewhere yesterday and this bloke get out of his car "wanna move your car, I've got a dog to get out the back?". No please, thank you or kiss my arse. My reply? "Seeing as you asked so nicely yes I'll move" then im given veiled threats of physical violence. FFS

I think I should live in the middle of a field miles from anyone else. People = Hell.

I got hit head on by a gent exiting a blind bend on the wrong side of the road several years back.

My tolerance for people cutting corners into oncoming traffic is very limited. That tends to be my horn-happy time.

[i]However[/i], living on the Isle of Wight I do have to remember that it's full of people that drive like my beloved Grandpa did - he was the kind of driver that was never in a crash, but saw several in his rear view mirror. As the OH reminded me too - I slow down when being tailgated which, was she pointed out, is a very good reason not to get too close when in a hurry.

Here in Italy, horns are used regularly, cars will hoot at cyclists to warn them that there isxa car behind, nothing aggressive

I think that's a big cultural difference. I noticed horns being used a lot more on the continent, but there was no apparent malice behind it. In the UK that seems different.

Roll a fat one? It seems to work for some on STW.

Just not in Austria. 😉

Aye, some really good points above cheers. For the record, there was no way round him. It's a weird 1 way system with a curb and bollards to the left in front of the shop (a good thing otherwise the lazy fat shit would probably have driven straight into the shop itself) and another curb to the right and a trolley park.

Last night's incident (I think) was a driving standards/selfishness/ignorance thing more than holding me up.. although I couldn't quite believe I got stuck behind some moron in an otherwise empty car park so maybe that was the ignition.. Anyway, great example for their daughter. Mam shouts/swears at people, Dad shouts/swears at people, Dad does what the **** he likes is his car, Mam never has to walk more than 20ft ever, etc. etc. The audacity of it! And he wasn't even driving a proper 4x4.. Just a FWD hatchback with a hat on. At least if he was in a Rangey I could have expected it.

I've been toying with the idea of a dashcam.. Might be a good preventative measure in not recording the wiping of my own bonnet with my dial by some nutcase. Or a comedy horn.. Either way I'm going to challenge myself not to use my horn for a while!

Drive a Grey Mini cooper? X4C** In Oakington after just having driven down a road you were allowed on?

If you did and you shouted at my wife for her sheer audacity to use a bike on the road today then I'd like a word.

I'm steaming and I wasn't even there at the time.

In the car these days I try to be as zen as possible, however, it doesn't always work.

The older I get, the less I feel the need to antagonise. In your situation I would have reversed and gone out another way. Life's to short to get involved in petty nothings. Move on.

[i]I'm steaming and I wasn't even there at the time.[/i]

Know how you feel - when my 13 year old tells me someone's had a go at him for using a crossing on his bike on his way to school, I just want to destroy them!

To be honest, I am exactly the same. I keep thinking I should go to the docs & discuss some kind of 'talking therapy' to re-program my brain & how I assess this stuff.

I am for the most part a calm & relatively competent driver. I know my limits, I know how to drive & try to be considerate to other road users, I don't leave it to the last minute to swerve across for a slip road, I use my mirrors when joining from a slip road, I indicate, let people out of junctions etc....

But......I get a real rage on when people do stupid stuff. I do 400 miles/week commuting & see selfish, impatient behaviour on a daily basis.
People see you coming round a roundabout, you are indicating that you are coming round, they know they should wait but you can just see the 'meh' in their eyes as they slowly pull out.

People who can't get over to the inside & sit in the obvious queue waiting to leave at the next slip who charge up the outside & squeeze their way in...

I was following a bloke in the outside of a dual carriageway a while back; it was obvious from the way he was surging (car zooming off, then slowing down repeatedly) that he was debating whether to pull into the inside or keep chancing it and hope to get a gap closer to the slip road. He leaves it way too late & indicated to pull between two cars that are way too close to get in between. Matey boy on the inside closes the gap even further, so now the bloke in front is stuffed.....he's running out of road before the slip road & has no way of getting across so starts braking to make an emergency swerve....I'd seen this developing so had backed right off, but decided to give him a toot as I went past to try & indicate that his driving was a bit shit & inconsiderate.....he then gesticulated at the car that had prevented him from pulling in, when really it was his impatience that had caused the last minute panic in the first place. As it was, he perhaps gained 3-4 seconds over just pulling over into a decent space further back down the road.

The thing is - most of this stuff doesn't really affect me. Chances are I see it coming and have already reacted to it. I know in my head that I can't control other people's action & that people are going to be morons but I can't help getting annoyed by it.
I want to stop them & have a rational chat with them to see if they are even aware that their driving is crap & inconsiderate to others.

My Dad used to be a black cabbie in London & just tells me to chill out & relax. I'd really love to be able to, but telling me to chill & relax is the same as telling someone who's scared of flying to just chill & relax or someone who hates spiders to just chill out & relax when they see one.....

Anyway - I've gone on a bit. Time for my Weetabix.

I have a little electronic keyring thing that plays a selection of random soundbites from Fawlty Towers on a crappy little speaker - "Right, well don't say I didn't warn !" "Please try to understand before one of us dies" etc. God knows where I got it from, but I put it in the centre console years ago and when I get angry behind the wheel (which is surprisingly often given my otherwise calm demeanour) I press it and laugh and feel calmer.

thenorthwind - Member

I have a little electronic keyring thing that plays a selection of random soundbites from Fawlty Towers on a crappy little speaker - "Right, well don't say I didn't warn !" "Please try to understand before one of us dies" etc. God knows where I got it from, but I put it in the centre console years ago and when I get angry behind the wheel (which is surprisingly often given my otherwise calm demeanour) I press it and laugh and feel calmer.

Funnily enough - you used to be able to get a Homer Simpson one of those that I kept meaning to buy that sticks on the dashboard and says something every time you whack it.

I think the only time I ever see my wife get angry, is when an oncoming vehicle overtakes a cyclist and thus forcing her to take evasive action, she is the most careful and considerate driver and I wish I shared her outlook. When I am a passenger I feel myself thinking "don't let that idiot in, he is pushing you out of the way" and she always lets them in and smiles.
It is very dodgy to get involved with other motorists physically and I think a previous response suggested looking at other areas of your life, as often they all seem to come to a head when we get behind the wheel.
As a cyclist, I often find myself shaking my head when wronged, but I know I am so vulnerable on a bicycle that its just not worth it.

Apart from the Weetabix, I could have written your previous post stumpy01!

I had a woman do the late cut across me onto the slip road last week, I glanced across just as a van then switched from the right sliproad lane to the left lane right in front of her (van had no way of knowing she's just arrived there). She gestures and shouts at the van! Made me laugh, but it just shows these ****ers have no idea what they're doing wrong.

Too much of a boring motorist to sound the horn out of anger. I do try, occasionally, but usually end up washing the rear window instead.

If I see someone chatting away on their phone on the motorway they'll tend to get a long blast as I get alongside. Occasionally if an HGV flicks their indicator on while I'm next to them with someone in lane 3 it'll get used for what it's designed for.

I only use the horn when they are actually going to hit me these days.

Motorists just seem to turn to instant rage if you sound the horn at them, even when they are in the wrong. A lot of the time it's just deliberate acts, others it's them not having a clue.

I've calmed down a hell of a lot these days, but I still have my moments when I have a word with other motorists.

The other day, a guy towing a caravan decided on a multi lane roundabout to leave at the same exit as me, despite him being in the lane to continue round. I had anticipated this but it still shocked me as he did it that late I thought he had committed to going round. As he missed the front of my van by a couple of feet, I sounded my horn.

On the dual carraigeway I passed him and he gave me a hand signal that you won't find in the Highway Code. This wound me up as, if I had done something wrong fair enough but he was just like that because I'd sounded my horn. At the next lights, I was turning left and was at an angle were I could see this clown so I opened my door, hung out and told him not to tell me to ...... Off when he was incapable of staying in lane.

I got no response, him and his wife just sat there as if they were in a police photofit. If you are big enough to tell me to ...... Off when I'm passing, say it to my face.

My parting message was to his wife saying that she must be really proud of him.

Perhaps I overreacted and should just have let it go, but that's the first time in a long time I've spoken to someone despite being on ten road 10 hours a day sometimes and being cut up a lot.

Best reaction I had ever was some guy who pulled out on me when I was on a national speed limit road doing 50-60 mph. I really had to slam on and I actually thought I was going to hit him as he had just glanced and not judged my speed. Luckily there was nothing coming the other way so I went round him.

Scared the ...... Out of me. At some lights, I got out and asked had he seen me. The guy hadn't got a clue it was a national speed limit road and told me he thought I was doing " about 30 " we left on good terms and hopefully I saved him from it happening again.

I used my horn this morning at the stupid woman that had dumped her 4x4 on the zigzags (and right up to the actual pedestrian lights) in a 20 zone right opposite school gates (both a primary and secondary school) at 9.10am so she could go to the door of a house opposite (and the house had a big and empty drive too).

Such utter disregard for others infuriated me.

+1 stumpy01.

TBH OP, what you're describing is someone who wants to get annoyed in the car. That's a bad attitude to have behind the wheel - it makes you a worse driver, not a better one.

It's clearly doing you no good. It doesn't sound like it's doing your relationship much good. Why don't you go and see someone about it. Life's too short to get angry every time you're behind the wheel.

DezB - Member

Apart from the Weetabix, I could have written your previous post stumpy01!

Pleased it's not just me!!

I tend to roll my eyes and tut.

There are a number of occasions where I've thought, actually if I don't brake quite so hard I'll hit you and it'll be your fault, but then I think I really don't need the hassle.

I'd love to have a car that roadworthy and pretty tough, like an old Rover from the 60's and just not give a shit and clatter into people when they do stuff they shouldn't to make them realise. Kind of like falling down in a car.

I honestly don't think I've beeped in anger, as in "here's a button I press to let people know that I'm cross". I know others do precisely this, the funniest being cross car horn conversations: "beep" "beeeep" "beeep beeeep" "BEEEP". I'll beep if someone's gone to sleep in front of a green light, or whatever, but this is pretty rare.

This doesn't mean that I don't get cross, obviously, I'm a middleaged man for christ's sake, I just don't feel the need to press a button to let everyone know. I feel even less need to press a button to somehow educate bad drivers in the error of their ways. I tell myself that people who drive stupidly are more likely to come a cropper and leave it at that.

When we got to a small roundabout I stopped, opened his door, took his keys out and chucked them over the hedge

this is exceptionally good stuff

Nearest I've ever come to a heart attack was a couple of years ago when some idiot undetook me then cut in in front of me. I saw red and hit the horn and headlight flasher for a good ten seconds and he must have been so shocked at the reaction that he suddenly swerved left and shot down a sliproad. I had pains in my chest for 24 hours afterwards.

Same thing happened a couple of days ago when a weasly-looking young gent in a cream Mercedes came shooting up on my left and tried to cut in in front of me. I normally keep an eye in my left mirror for this kind of stunt so I stayed cool and managed to move forward, hit the horn and shut him out, while the woman behind me saw his intention and moved up as well so he ended up blocked by the slower-moving vehicle we were all overtaking. It doesn't give me pride to admit I did it but I felt better for shutting the idiot out.

There are no Police on patrol nowadays so the fear of a random catch has gone and certain types of drivers feel the law doesn't apply to them so they are free to use the roads as their own race track. Driving has become more dangerous because of idiots and you have to exercise even more caution and assertion than ever nowadays.

Highway Code - Rule 112

The horn. Use only while your vehicle is moving and you need to warn other road users of your presence. Never sound your horn aggressively.

bigyinn - Member

There are a number of occasions where I've thought, actually if I don't brake quite so hard I'll hit you and it'll be your fault, but then I think I really don't need the hassle.

I'd love to have a car that roadworthy and pretty tough, like an old Rover from the 60's and just not give a shit and clatter into people when they do stuff they shouldn't to make them realise. Kind of like falling down in a car.

I have, ahem, never had that very same thought.....

some idiot undetook me

A game I play is to wait until they're in my blind spot and put my left indicator on...

It's not big or clever, but it is quite fun.

Highway Code - Rule 112

The horn. Use only while your vehicle is moving and you need to warn other road users of your presence. Never sound your horn aggressively.

Yes, never break the highway code to warn dimwits that they are breaking the highway code. Verrrry useful that.
I bet you never flash your lights to let someone out of a junction either.

Colleague of mine clattered off a dozy numpty who cut him up.

2 problems.
1. The engine and gearbox in the car were one of less than 10 prototypes in existence. The car was booked up about 90 hours a week for the next 6 months for testing. Was of the road for 2 months. Potential bill of millions. Literally.

2. It was a directors daughter who cut him up. In a company car. We self insure.

It's weird how people are so utterly stupid though - drove home from Brighton quite late Tues night, not many cars on the road... 2 I overtook left their headlights on full beam until I slowed down and flashed them, another, a newish Jag I think, had every single fog light lighting them up like a Xmas tree (it was a clear night). They were sat in the outside lane of an empty dual carriageway as I approached - I flashed my lights a few times. Not only did they not turn off their fog lights, but they stayed in the right lane, showing no intention of moving over.. so I drove past (not undertook as I never changed lanes!) on their left. Still never moved into the left lane, well after I'd gone past.
I just find it absolutely baffling!!

I believe that you are taught to pass your test nowadays, not taught to drive.

In the last few years I've turned into a really nervous driver due to selfish, inconsiderate drivers. I feel bullied.

Regarding tailgating, an advanced motorist instructor advised me to move over.

I haven't had the raging horn in a car since 1995.

When I first started driving a million years ago my first car had the horn on one of the indicator stick things, and being a new driver I was all full of aggression and hooting towards all these other idiot bad drivers all the time.

When I got a new car with the horn activated by pressing the centre of the steering wheel my instincts/reflexes refused to acknowledge the change, so someone cutting me up, braking hard for turns without indicating, pulling out in front off me or any other bad road behaviour would lead to me mashing the stick on the steering column where the horn "should" be, then watching them drive away oblivious while I sit there in a mess of indicators, windscreen wipers, and screen wash going off. After a few times of this happening I took to just physically shouting "BEEEEEEEEP" as loud as I felt was appropriate inside the car. I found this to be much more satisfying than just pressing the horn button, but it did sometimes unnerve my passengers who weren't expecting it.

Eventually I ended up driving a Nissan Almeira, only for a year or so, but it's impossible to get angry driving an Almeira, you just slowly float along without the worry of having acceleration or cornering ability to think about and just watch all the other idiots playing silly buggers with each other, since that car I've never got "the rage" back

Regarding tailgating, an advanced motorist instructor advised me to move over.

I think there should be a psychological element to the driving test, as I feel that people who do things like lean on the horn at every opportunity aren't mentally stable enough to handle the responsibility of driving a car. This would have the effect of reducing traffic on the roads by about 95% so would solve a number of problems in a single stroke!

I'm generally quite relaxed when driving but am far more, erm, assertive, on he bike. I will always, if I get the chance, usually several minutes later at some lights, challenge anyone I have seen using a phone at the wheel, and there are literally dozens. I get to talk to a small proportion...
Had a couple who have scared me, van driver who tried to drive into me afterwards, reported to his boss, and then someone who sent her boyfriend to start a shouting match the following day (regular commute). Said the Exposure Joystick on my helmet was a camera and I had already reported her and any violence from him would also be reported. Lights save lives 🙂 But yes, slightly concerned that I will get a thump one day but much more concerned about some arsehole crashing into me while sending his text, if an ear bashing stops them doing it again, even if it's just when I'm on that bit of road with them, it helps keep me alive.

[i]Anyone left the red mist/road rage mindset behind and what was the turning point?[/i].

During nearly 3 decades of driving, some years hitting 40K+ miles. I have had the opportunity to offer my opinion to other road users, numerous times...

However, quite soon after starting to drive, esp when using the big road and witnessing just what does happen out there. I came to understand there's no point remonstrating or whatever, with any other road user.
I realized that no matter how much I may object or the manner in which I choose to do so. The other person isn't likely to change their ways. If they are an inconsiderate, selfish, asshat, nothing I can do will change that, in any constructive way.

So now I pretty much just ignore the muppets. That as well as being very good at seeing an outcome on the road before it happens and so avoiding in the first place. Not always, but often.

So there, perhaps realize you are powerless to "educate" AND that it isn't actually your job, change the way other road users behave.
Just chill.

Regarding tailgating, an advanced motorist instructor advised me to move over.

It's the safest way.

Me, I have a pathological intolerance for bullies, so I usually take my foot off the accelerator for a few seconds then drive back up to the speed limit again. They generally get the message (especially if they're in an 18-wheeler). Though it'll probably get me killed one day.

Some sage advice about it not mattering one hoot what I do, it won't change the behaviour of said nobbers. Think that's my key takeaway. And in response to an earlier post - I don't need to "see" anyone about this.. that's what STW is for innit?

Regards tailgating - best I seen was a monster of a man get out of his RR Sport at a roundabout like he was squeezing out of a Micra and walk up to the van behind him and shout "Stay the **** away from the back of my car!". The van who had previously left a good 6" gap extended that to about 1/4 of a mile thereafter.

But you'll die knowing you were right.

Regarding tailgating, an advanced motorist instructor advised me to move over.

Yes it is but...

once the road in front is clear changing down to 4th and disappearing up the road is a lot more fun

I used to do a lot of miles (40k a year) and I was terrible for road rage. I'd have several sessions on long trips until it'd reach boiling point and I'd be out the car ready for a punch up. I also have an amazing ability for picking the wrong car/bloke to have a fight with. Not one for stereotyping, but if you see a van towing a caravan or its a builders van with a crew cab, or any vehicle that indicates the driver could be fairly handy, put aside your rage for a bit and go to your quiet place. Or do what I did and find yourself being launched over your bonnet followed by a pretty thorough kicking and your door mirrors being punched off. I drive a lot less now, but I've also learnt my lesson in that you never know the type of person driving.

As for being on the bike, every single day without fail I have someone pull out on me or get way to close (#becauselondon). You can yell and shout and kick off but all it does is ruin the rest of your morning as you fester on it.

You'll never 'win' in a situation like that (although you'll come up with some amazing come back lines afterwards as you fester). You won't suddenly teach someone the error of their ways or change their driving style so why bother.

But you'll die knowing you were right.

That's all that really matters, after all.

Years ago I had a gun waved at me after beeping at someone and sticking my fingers up at them. In a country where life was cheap, and a telling off from my wife, I learned to stop.

I'm not surprised - a telling off from your wife!

[i]Regarding tailgating, an advanced motorist instructor advised me to move over.[/i]

[i]This is what I do, it's really the only safe thing you can do in the circumstance where someone is properly tailgating you (actually quite rare IME) rather than just driving a bit close.[/i]

I spray the windscreen washers and the car too close behind gets a good soaking. After a while they realise it isn't raining and that the water is coming from the car in front. They usually get the message and back off.

Regarding tailgating, an advanced motorist instructor advised me to move over.

Getting out of their way is definitely the safest option. The best place for someone so ignorant that they don't realise they have no way of stopping if you do is far away from you.

People are not properly taught how to drive, simple as. Someone who has just passed their test can parallel park and know what some signs mean but that doesn't mean that they know how to read the road and traffic or handle a ton or so of machinery when things don't go how they expect. Hell you can't even go on a motorway until you have a full license, by which time all compulsory training has ended. It took me longer to qualify as a tree surgeon than as a car driver and many times the money. I was a bad driver and I am not qualified to call myself a good one now but I am infinitely better. Experience can't be taught but but the roads are full of people young and old who are unsafe at any speed, it's not right.

I feel the need to inform poor drivers what they've done wrong, to my wife's despair. I don't get angry, but, I can't help myself.

Last year or so I was driving towards the M1 on a dual carriageway I was aware of some guy in a car weaving between both lanes to quicken his journey. As he was, maybe two thirds past me he cut into the left lane and forced me onto the grass verge to avoid a collision. Seconds later, when he leant over to his glovebox I seized the opportunity to repay the skills and cut him off. He was Livid. As he tried to carve a third lane I blocked him continously. When we finally got to the roundabout he accelerated into the roundabout and made a shooting motion at me. Me, I just waved and laughed. What I'd have done if he'd have followed me I don't know.

A tip I recently heard for tailgaters is to leave a large gap in front - 4 secs rather than 2. Seems to make sense. Don't get bothered by them myself anyway.

Oh definitely, if you only have to brake gently it at least gives them a chance to stop. 2 seconds is an absolute minimum anyway.

I don't get half the tailgaters I used to. I got a boring middle aged Jaguar this year and the attitude I get compared to driving my old boyed up VWs, 205s and such is a world apart.

Anyone left the red mist/road rage mindset behind and what was the turning point? Also - can car horns run out?

Yes. It was the realisation that the anger I expressed had a bigger negative effect on me than it did on the people I was angry with. I would get disappointed that I had let someone else goad me into bad behaviour, that they likely did not care one iota and wouldn't change their behaviour and even worse that they might get a kick out of winding me up.

I never got tailgated in my ancient diesel peugeot.

Probably as it smoked immensely as soon as i put my foot on the throttle. Not helped by the unkmown mileage (a previous owner had disconnected the odometer when it hit 100000km) and a rather casual approach to servicing (never). It had a clean spot. 1800rpm ish and about 50% throttle. Spent my entire ownership of that car trying to keep it in that zone.

Got it in part payment for a weeks labouring........